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#1504: HULL CRUSH DEPTH

Wed, 2003 Aug 6

topical

                                        /                          
                                       ( .                   |\    
             .                         | I__        ___---~~~  |   
            .                   _i_---~~~~  \_---~~~        _-\|   
          :;.:                /~      ____--~           __-~       
          ;:         ___---~~~----~~~~             __--~           
        : :  __---~~~  _                      __--~                
       : _-~~  ___---~~_O                __--~                     
      .:(_            ~          ___---~~       I SHOULD HAVE NEVER
  *.::; ;;~~~------_____-----~~~~           JOINED THE RUSSIAN NAVY
**..;                                                              
  *   snafu                                                        

#1592: MARK MITSUBISHI

Sun, 2003 Nov 2

topical

                     MARK MITSUBISHI MARK MITSUBISHI MARK MITSUBISHI
     ____________    MARK MITSUBISHI MARK MITSUBISHI MARK MITSUBISHI
   .F............T.  MARK MITSUBISHI MARK MITSUBISHI MARK MITSUBISHI
   | .----------. |                                                 
   | |',' ',' , | |           _......_             .''''''''''.     
   | `----------' |        _+'        `+_        .'            '.   
  _|.-. _...._ .-.|_     _/.-. _...._ .-.\_     _|.-. _...._ .-.|_  
 (_)`-' __[]__ `-'(_)   (_)`-' __{}__ `-'(_)   (_)`-' __/\__ `-'(_) 
(....__|WATCHU|__....) (....__|SBAITA|__....) (....__|NDSWIT|__....)
 | |    ~~~~~~    | |   | |    ~~~~~~    | |   | |    ~~~~~~    | | 
 `-'              `-'   `-'              `-'   `-'              `-' 
                                                   _.--------._     
      .--------.            .----------.         ,'.----------.',   
    .'          `.         /            \       /='------------`=\  
  _`.-. _...._ .-.'_     _(.-. _...._ .-.)_   .F_______...._______Y.
 (_)`-' __)(__ `-'(_)   (_)`-' __()__ `-'(_)  |(_)(_) ______ (_)(_)|
(....__|CHYOUR|__....) (....__|EBAYAU|__....) (....__|CTIONS|__....)
 | |    ~~~~~~    | |   | |    ~~~~~~    | |   | |    ~~~~~~    | | 
 `-'              `-'   `-'              `-'   `-'              `-' 

#1902: FABRICATION

Tue, 2004 Sep 7

topical

      .-------.                                            
     _|~~ ~~  |_     IF I MAKE UP SOME COMPLETE LIE ABOUT  
   =(_|_______|_)=   A REPUBLICAN CROWD BOOING AT PRESIDENT
     |:::::::::|     CLINTON'S HEALTH MAYBE THAT WILL MAKE 
     |:::::::[]|     IT TRUE ?!?!?!                        
     |o=======.|                                           
jgs  `"""""""""`     WELP TRYING ANYWAY                    

#2192: A BRILLIANT PLAN

Fri, 2005 Jun 24

topical

      _____                    _____                      
  ---'   __\______      ______/__   `---                  
            ______)    (______                            
            __)            (__                            
           __)              (__                           
  ---.______)     VK         (______.---                  
                                                          
                                                          
OKAY I HAVE A BRILLIANT PLAN TO MAKE A LOT OF MONEY       
WITH NO RISK OR CHANCE OF FAILURE BECAUSE IT'S SO CLEVERLY
CONCEIVED                                                 
                                                          
THINGS I'LL NEED (FIRST THINGS FIRST, MAKE A CHECKLIST):  
                                                          
[ ] PLANE TICKET TO SAN JOSE                              
                                                          
[ ] $5 FOR A WENDY'S CHILI                                
                                                          
[ ] SEVERED FINGER                                        

#2261: HURRICANE KATRINA

Thu, 2005 Sep 1

am i right, blog, hurricane, topical

                       .....                                           
                    .'       '.    BLOGGERS RECORD KATRINA DESTRUCTION,
                   .           .     THEIR LOVE FOR BOBA FETT          
                   :           :                                       
                   '           '                                       
         ,.*====.   '.       .'   .====*.,                             
        .-`"/c)}}},    :...:    ,{{{(c\"`-.                            
    _.-'-6>   {{{{{'''`     `'''}}}}}   <9-'-._                        
   t         |}}}}}}           {{{{{{|         y                       
    \__.___.'{{{{{{{           }}}}}}}'.___.__/                        
        `[__/}}}}}}}}         {{{{{{{{\__]`                            
         {{{.'     `'-._   _.-'`     '.}}}                             
         }}/            ```            \{{   MORE LIKE WET TUESDAY     
         {{|                           |}}    AM I RIGHT FOLKS         
         }}|                           |{{                             
  .------{{{\    ,               ,    /}}}------.                      
 //.--------'    ;               ;   '---------.\\                     
((///  _          \             /          _  \\\))                    
 (((--' `''-------'`'"'-----'"'`'-------''` '--)))  jgs                

#2263: HURRICANE NAMES

Sat, 2005 Sep 3

hurricane, topical

   ),-.     /\                                           
  <(a  `---','  Q: WHY ARE HURRICANES NAMED AFTER BITCHES
  ( `-, ._> )                                            
   ) _>.___/    A: DUH                                   
       _/                                                
hjw                                                      

#2300: NECK AND NECK

Mon, 2005 Oct 10

hurricane, topical

      ,-'-.     _.,                                      
   . (    '("'-'  ').                                    
( ' ((  |.      )\/( )      HURRICANE KATRINA: 900 POINTS
 '(  )) | () |" |  | ')                                  
    ( . ,-. ,-.. __.)       STOMPY IRAQI FEET: 800 POINTS
      /)  /  ' /                                         
 PjP /   /) / /            IT'S NECK AND NECK PEOPLE     

#2314: BIRD FLU

Mon, 2005 Oct 24

topical

       __      ,-/    FRET NOT MY DEAR, I'VE TAKEN THE LIBERTY OF
    ." \ `.   / (     CREATING A STOCKPILE OF EMERGENCY PORN     
   ( \\`\\_|_;   \    (IN CASE OF THE BIRD FLU)                  
    \\ _,' // ) ``)                                              
     `/ // /// ',/    BIRD FLU REDUCES YOUR ABILITY TO BEAT OFF  
     (// /_,'_,-'     BECAUSE YOU CAN'T CHOKE YOURSELF           
jrei  `'-'.l_l_                                                  

#2317: BITCHES

Thu, 2005 Oct 27

hurricane, topical

               . '@(@@@@@@@)@. (@@) `  .   '                         
     .  @@'((@@@@@@@@@@@)@@@@@)@@@@@@@)@           KATRINA ??!?!?!?  
     @@(@@@@@@@@@@))@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@)@@` .                           
  @.((@@@@@@@)(@@@@@@@@@@@@@@))@\@@@@@@@@@)@@@  .     RITA !?!?!?!?? 
 (@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@)@@@@@@@@@@@\\@@)@@@@@@@@)                       
(@@@@@@@@)@@@@@@@@@@@@@(@@@@@@@@//@@@@@@@@@) `     WILMA ?!?!?!?!?   
 .@(@@@@)##&&&&&(@@@@@@@@)::_=(@\\@@@@)@@ .   .'                     
   @@`(@@)###&&&&&!!;;;;;;::-_=@@\\@)@`@.                            
   `   @@(@###&&&&!!;;;;;::-=_=@.@\\@@     '                         
      `  @.#####&&&!!;;;::=-_= .@  \\                                
            ####&&&!!;;::=_-        `    EVER WONDER WHY THEY NAME   
             ###&&!!;;:-_=               HURRICANES AFTER BITCHES    
              ##&&!;::_=                                             
             ##&&!;:=                                                
            ##&&!:-                                                  
           #&!;:-                                                    
          #&!;=                                                      
          #&!-                                                       
           #&=                                                       
   jgs      #&-   YES I KNOW THIS IS A DRAWING OF A TORNADO, FUCK YOU
            \\#/'                                                    
 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^                                

#2322: PLUTO

Tue, 2005 Nov 1

pluto, topical

                    ::: =,    ;    PLUTO HAS THREE MOONS !?!?!??!?!?!    
                ;;=;;===      M                                          
   ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=              MAJOR BLOW STRUCK TO GROUP OF AVID   
 :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======         AMATEURS WHO WISH TO DEMOTE      
=tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM       PLUTO FROM PLANETARY STATUS    
tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                                   
tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM                                 
=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM                                
,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM                               
,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM                              
...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM                              
.         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;                             
           .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM                              
           .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM   MEANWHILE .......          
             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM                                
              .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB   THE REST OF THE ASTRONOMICAL  
M               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=    COMMUNITY STILL COULDN'T GIVE A
M                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::    SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!                 
                      `,,,,,,,                                           
                                     THE MAP IS NOT THE TERRITORY        

#2326: ANNE RICE

Sat, 2005 Nov 5

hurricane, topical

                 /######\                                                   
               /##########\    ANNE RICE CRITICIZES KATRINA RESPONSE ?!?!?! 
              /   \###/    \                                                
             /     \#/      \    YOU KNOW I'D HAVE THOUGHT IT'D BE A        
          /\|               |/\   DIFFERENT ANNE RICE BUT NOPE IT'S THAT ONE
          | | \ ==\    /== / | |                                            
           \|  \<|>\  /<|>/  |/     /|   HEY I HAVE AN IDEA                 
    \__     |    -   \  -    |     /#|                                      
     \#\     |        |      |   /###|   LET'S GIVE THIS MICROPHONE TO A    
      \##\   |       \|     |  /#####|   MORON AND SEE WHAT THEY SAY        
       \###\  |   _______  | /######|                                       
        \####\ | / \/ \/ \|/#######|                                        
        |######\|        |#########|                                        
        |########\______/##########|                                        
        |#########\    /##########/                                         
        |##########\  |#########/\       WOW                                
        /###########\/########/###\                                         
VW  /################\######/########\     SOMETHING MORONIC, NOT WHAT      
   /##################\###/###########\     I EXPECTED                      
  /###################\#/##############\                                    
 /####################/#################\                                   
/###################/####################\                                  

#2359: LIVE 8

Thu, 2005 Dec 8

topical

         ,                                                       
    ,   |\ ,__       BOY I SURE HAD A GOOD TIME AT LIVE 8 !!!!!  
    |\   \/   `.                                                 
    \ `-.:.     `\    I FEEL MORE INTERCONNECTED WITH NATURE NOW 
     `-.__ `\=====|                                              
        /=`'/   ^_\   I REALLY CAN'T DECIDE WHAT I HATE MORE: ALL
      .'   /\   .=)   THE CORPORATE CONSUMER COMMERCIALISM OR ALL
   .-'  .'|  '-(/_|   THE CORPORATIONAL COMMERCIAL CONSUMERISM   
 .'  __(  \  .'`                                                 
/_.'`  `.  |`    CAN'T WE JUST ALL AGREE THAT HUGS ARE *GOOD*    
    jgs  \ |     AND *NUCLEAR EXPLOSIONS* ARE BAD !?!?!?!?!?     
          |/                                                     

#2368: BOBBY BROWN CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

Sat, 2005 Dec 17

bobby brown, bravo, christmas, topical

                   _                                              
           __     /,)                                             
      _,-""`'""-./,/                                              
      \ "-.  .  /,/    GREAT BRAVO HAS ANOTHER BOBBY BROWN SPECIAL
    /"\`.\ |;-\/\/"\    WHERE HE BEATS WHITNEY ON CAMERA (I GUESS)
   ;.  \_ `./\ X/.  ;                                             
   |:.:. \_\/_//;   |                                             
   |:..   ../  |/.  |                                             
   ;::. :   "\ /.  .;                                             
    \:::. ..|."|\ ./                                              
     `:::.: ` ./,,'                                               
..:::::"-:.__..-"-._                                              
  itz   `-._____,---'                                             

#2372: POOR LEO

Wed, 2005 Dec 21

topical, west wing

    _____                                                          
  /~/~   ~\    OH GOD LEO'S DEAD WHO WILL BE VICE PRESIDENT NOW    
 | |       \                                                       
 \ \        \     THIS IS GOD'S PUNISHMENT FOR STARRING IN L.A. LAW
  \ \        \     ALL THOSE YEARS AGO                             
 --\ \       .\''                                                  
--==\ \     ,,i!!i,   SHIT I FORGOT THAT MEANS SANTOS IS TOAST TOO 
    ''"'',,}{,,                                                    
                   I GUESS VINICK WILL BE RUNNING UNOPPOSED SHORTLY

#2374: PURPLE FINGERS

Fri, 2005 Dec 23

iraq, topical

  .-.                     .-.                                         
  |U|                     | |    ELEVEN MILLION PURPLE FINGERS BITCHES
  | |                     | |                                         
  | |-._                  | |-._                                      
  | | | |-.               |_| | |-.                                   
 /|     ` |              / )|_|_|_|                                   
| |       |             | | `-^-^-'                                   
|         |             |     ||  |                                   
\         /             \     '   /                                   
 |       |     VK        |       |                                    
 |       |               |       |                                    

#2401: HURRICANE THREAT

Thu, 2006 Jan 19

hurricane, michael moore, topical

                                                 
   ,(   ,(   ,(   ,(   ,(   ,(   ,(   ,(         
`-'  `-'  `-'  `-'  `-'  `-'  `-'  `-'  `        
                                                 
  THERE IS NO HURRICANE THREAT                   
                                                 
  THERE IS NO HURRICANE THREAT                   
                                                 
  YES THERE HAVE BEEN HORRIFIC ACTS OF HURRICANES
   AND YES THERE WILL BE ACTS OF HURRICANES AGAIN
                                                 
  BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT THERE IS SOME      
   MASSIVE HURRICANE THREAT                      

#2472: CANADIAN EXTRADITION LAW

Fri, 2006 Mar 31

canada, topical

 _                                                               
(_)                                                              
 |______________________________________                         
 |&&&&&&&                        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&                        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&                        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&         .\^/.          &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&       . |&&&| .        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&       |\|&&&|/|        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&    .--'&&&&&&&'--.     &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&     \&&&&&&&&&&&/      &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&      >&&&&&&&&&<       &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&     '~|/~~|~~\|~'      &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&           |            &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&                        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&                        &&&&&&&|                        
 |&&&&&&&________________________&&JGS&&|                        
 |~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~                         
                                                                 
   WE PROMISE NOT TO EXECUTE HIM IF YOU EXTRADITE HIM !!!!!!!    
                                                                 
   LOL THANKS PSYCH WE'RE GOING TO KILL HIM ANYWAY (DUMBASSES)   
                                                                 
   LOOK MAYBE IF YOUR PUBLIC POLICY WEREN'T SO GIRLY AND RETARDED
     WE WOULDN'T HAVE TO TRICK YOU                               

#2487: APRIL FOOL'S ON WIKIPEDIA

Sat, 2006 Apr 15

nerd boy, topical, wikipedia

WE'RE CATALOGUING ALL THE INTERNET-RELATED APRIL FOOL'S     
 PRANKS THIS YEAR ON WIKIPEDIA BECAUSE WE'RE TOTALLY NERDS  
  WHO NEED TO DIE                                           
                      _  \                 I MOLEST CHILDREN
                     |_|  \  __          /                  
                      |     #..#     \OO                    
                      |     .)(.      ||.                   
                    ________ || _____ dd _________/         
                    ------------------------------'     jg  

#2492: SOMETHING FOR NOTHING

Thu, 2006 Apr 20

immigration, topical

 _    _.--.____.--.__                                                   
( )=.-":;:\         \"-._          WE DEMAND THE RIGHT TO LIVE IN THIS  
 \\\:;:;:;:;   ( ,:. \$$$\         COUNTRY AND NOT PAY TAXES AND GET    
  \\\:;:;:;|    ):::  )$$$\        FULL CITIZENSHIP RIGHTS FOR FREE     
   \\\:;::;:\ \o(/)o/($$$$$\                                            
    \\\:;:;:;\ `-.-'  \$$$$$\      YES I'M SAYING THIS WITHOUT STOPPING 
     \\\:;::;:\ ' `    \$$$$$\     A BEAT BECAUSE I THINK IT MAKES SENSE
      \\\;;:;::,--:_:_:-^$$$$$\                                         
       \\\_.-""           `"""$\   I'M GOING TO SHOW MY LOVE FOR YOUR   
        \\                         COUNTRY BY WAVING THE MEXICAN FLAG   
         \\                        LIKE A HUGE FAT IDIOT FUCKWAD WHO    
          \\                       WANTS SOMETHING FOR NOTHING          
           \\                                                           
            \\                                                          
hh+geni+vk   \\                                                         
  +hrr                                                                  

#2493: TOUCHING AND STOPPING

Fri, 2006 Apr 21

topical

                      | | / /                                     
                    \         /                                   
                   \__   ____  /                                  
                  /   \ /    \  |                                 
  /|             /     |      \ \                                 
 / |____________/     /        | |_____________/////////          
<  |____________|     |        |(______________       ()          
 \ |           /   () | ()     | |             \\\\\\\\\          
  \|           |    __|__      | |                                
              _|___/___  \___  | |                                
        __----         ----__\---\_                               
       /                        __ |                              
       \____-------------______/  \                               
                /    /  /      / _/                               
               /     \ /      / /                                 
              /       $      / /   YOU'RE INAPPROPRIATELY TOUCHING
             /              / /      AND STOPPING ME              
            |              | /                                    
            \______________//                                     
               \________/                                         

#2516: HOLIDAY MEAL

Sun, 2006 May 14

topical, wishful thinking

                 .--.                                            
 {\             / q {\                                           
 { `\           \ (-(~`                                          
{ '.{`\          \ \ )     IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF HOLIDAY MEAL
{'-{ ' \  .-""'-. \ \               I'D BE A TURDUCKEN           
{._{'.' \/       '.) \                                           
{_.{.   {`            |                                          
{._{ ' {   ;'-=-.     |                                          
 {-.{.' {  ';-=-.`    /                                          
  {._.{.;    '-=-   .'                                           
   {_.-' `'.__  _,-'                                             
      jgs   |||`                                                 
           .='==,                                                

#2519: BRING YOUR ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT TO WORK DAY

Wed, 2006 May 17

immigration, topical

WHAT ABOUT BRING YOUR ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT TO WORK DAY
                                                   
SO WE CAN DEPORT THEM                              
                                                   
        _____                                      
     _.'_____`._                                   
   .'.-'  12 `-.`.                                 
  /,' 11      1 `.\                                
 // 10      /   2 \\                               
;;         /       ::                              
|| 9  ----O      3 ||                              
::                 ;;                              
 \\ 8           4 //                               
  \`. 7       5 ,'/                                
   '.`-.__6__.-'.'                                 
    ((-._____.-))                                  
    _))       ((_                                  
   '--'SSt    '--'                                 

#2526: WEST WING CANCELLED

Wed, 2006 May 24

topical, west wing

            ____                                            
          /`   )))                                          
         /    `6 6    WHY DIDN'T BARTLET LEARN              
         )   ,   >                                          
         \___\ _=/                                          
          __/ /__                                           
   ===.__/`)__ _|\     CRIPPLES CAN'T SERVE IN PUBLIC OFFICE
       \/ ,/ _)_)_\                                         
       /./\    ( \ \                                        
       \_\ )_,-'`-./_______                                 
       _( \======+________ \                                
        //|__    |      , ) \                               
        %'    `% |____/  /\  \                              
       %   '    %' \ /__/\ \/,\                             
       %  -o-   %   \ )/  \_ ) \                            
       %   '    %   ,'/  ,'  ,\ \                           
b'ger   %      %   / /\_'__,'  '-`                          
          %  %     \/( o )           WHO THE FDR WHAT NOW   
                      ```                                   

#2532: THE NASONEX BEE

Tue, 2006 May 30

immigration, topical

.                                                         
\'~~~-,                                                   
 \    '-,_             LOOK IT'S THE HISPANIC NASONEX BEE 
  \ /\    `~'~''\                                         
  _\ \\          \/~\      HE'S KIND OF FRIGHTENING REALLY
  \__ \\             \                                    
     \ \\.             \      GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO MAKE  
      \ \ \             `~~     ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS FELONS 
       '\\ \.             /                               
        L \  \            |                               
         \_\  \      o    |             _.----,           
               |           \           !     /            
              '._           \_      __/    _/             
                 \_           ''--''    __/               
               AM  \.__                |                  
                       ''.__  __.._   __\                 
                            ''     './  `                 

#2544: DAVE NAVARRO WE HARDLY KNEW YE

Sun, 2006 Jun 11

tattoo, topical

              .                                                        
           b   A                                                       
           $b  Vb.                                                     
           '$b  V$b.                                                   
            $$b  V$$b.                                                 
            '$$b. V$$$$oooooooo.         ..                            
             '$$P* V$$$$$""**$$$b.    .o$$P                            
              " .oooZ$$$$b..o$$$$$$$$$$$$C                             
              .$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$b.                           
              $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$                           
        .o$$$o$$$$$$$$P""*$$$$$$$$$P"""*$$$P                           
       .$$$**$$$$P"q$C    "$$$b        .$$P                            
       $$P   "$$$b  "$ . .$$$$$b.      *"                              
       $$      $$$.     "***$$$$$$$b. A.                               
       V$b   . Z$$b.  .       "*$$$$$b$$:                              
        V$$.  "*$$$b.  b.         "$$$$$                               
         "$$b     "*$.  *b.         "$$$b                              
           "$$b.     "L  "$$o.        "*"     .ooo..                   
             "*$$o.        "*$$o.          .o$$$$$$$$b.                
                 "*$$b.       "$$b.       .$$$$$*"   ""*.              
                    "*$$o.      "$$$o.    $$$$$'                       
                       "$$o       "$$$b.  "$$$$   ...oo..              
                         "$b.      "$$$$b. "$$$$$$$P*"""""             
                        . "$$       "$$$$b  "$$$$P"                    
                         L."$.      .$$$$$.  $$$$                      
          ..              $$$;      o$$$$$$  $$$$                      
       . $.l              "$$'    .$$$$$$$P  $$$P                      
     .I .$b b '.           "P   .P*""*$$$$;  $$$                       
   .$P  $$o ". ".  .        " ."      $$$$   $$;                       
  .$$;  $$$. "A "$. ".       '       o$$$P  .$P                        
 .$$$b  $$$$. *$. "$$$$o.          .$$$$P   $"                         
.$$$$$  $$$$$. "$$o."**$$$$o.'  .o$$$$P"    P                          
$$P"$$b $$$$$$o  "*$$$$boooooc$$$$$$$P"   .                            
$$  $$$."$$$"*$$.   "$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$C  .o"                            
I"  $P"$."$$b. "*$.    "**$$$$$*"*$$$$$$$"                             
'   $  "$."$$$.   ""'              "*$$*                               
    $.   "."$$$$o        mls                                           
    "I       "$$$$b. .                                                 
                "$$$b."$o.                                             
                  "*$$."$$$o.       DAVE NAVARRO SUCKS DICK HUH ?!?!?!?
                    "$$o $$$$b.                                        
                     '$$o'$$$$$b.                                      
                      '$$.'$$$**$o                                     
                       '$$.$$$. '$$                                    
                        $$; $$$o. "$.                                  
                        "$: $$ "*o  ".                                 
                     L   $$ $P    l  '.                                
                     $. .$$ $;                                         
                     ;$.$$P $                                          
                     "$$$$ P'    ALL THOSE TATTOOS CAN'T HIDE THE GAY  
                      $$$;:                                            
                      $$P                                              
                     o$P                                               
                     $P                                                
                     I'                                                
                     '                                                 

#2559: PARISIANS

Mon, 2006 Jun 26

french, topical

   ___ _______________________                                       
  |===|=======================|                                      
  |||||_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|   GAYS AND LESBIANS MARCHING ON PARIS
 [___[_________________________]  FOR GAY PRIDE ?!?!?!?              
  |---|-------|--_-_--|-------|                                      
  |[ ]| [:.:] |,'`. `.| [:.:] |   FIRST IMMIGRANTS THEN STUDENTS NOW 
  ====|========    ||:|========   THE HOMO BRIGADE !?!?!?            
  ||^||  {$}  |    ||:|  {$}  |                                      
  ||:|| (:..) |    ||:| (:.:) |   JESUS DON'T YOU PARISIANS HAVE JOBS
  ||:||=======|    ||:|=======|   OR SOMETHING                       
  ||:||_______|    ||:|_______|                                      
                                  OH                                 
jrei                                                                 
                                  RIGHT                              

#2580: HEZBOLLAH

Mon, 2006 Jul 17

topical

                     __                                                
                    [__]   COULD WE GET TOGETHER AND FORM A COMMITTEE  
                    |  |   OF SOME SORT TO FINALLY ONCE AND FOR ALL    
                    |  |   AGREE ON THE PROPER WAY TO SPELL            
                    |  |   "HEZBOLLAH" OR "HIZBOLLAH" OR "HIZBALLAH" OR
                    |  |   WHATEVER THE FUCK IT IS BECAUSE SERIOUSLY   
                    |  |   FOLKS THE LACK OF CONSISTENCY IS ANNOYING   
       ,----.      /`-. \                                              
      (      )    /-._|  \                                             
      |`----'|   |        |                                            
      \      /   |`-...   |                                            
       `.  ,'    |'` . |  |                                            
         ||      |`,'- |  |                                            
       ,-||-.    |`-...|  |                                            
jrei  (  ''  )   |        |                                            
       `----'     `-....-'                                             

#2585: ATLAS SHRUGGED

Sat, 2006 Jul 22

topical

           +  .        _            .-.    Q: WHO IS JOHN GALT   
                   3==({)_    .    (   \                         
  +  .             _  )`\-|      *  )   \                        
          .       /_`' // |\     .-'     `-a:f                   
.                B'/`-'M\_| )   /       .                        
        . *       //       (   /      .                          
                 B'         `-'              A: BRAD PITT I GUESS

#2588: THE LEBONESE-LESBIAN CONNECTION

Tue, 2006 Jul 25

topical

           ___,,                                          
          (()))))                                         
         ())    |   I LIKE WRITING IT "LESBIAN" INSTEAD OF
        ())c  6_6    "LEBONESE" BECAUSE THAT WAY IT MAKES 
        )(;\___/)     CURRENT EVENTS MORE INTERESTING     
      .'  \,/:\,/`.                                       
     /       :     \                                      
    |   Y    :   Y  |                                     
    |__ |    :   |  |   ___                               
    /_ \/-=:;,_  |  |  /.-.\                              
   (/ )/-..___/-.|__j__\\  Y                              
  _/ /== === =///\== === \ _\_                            
 / `Y== === === === === ==Y   \                           
( // )-------------------(  \\ )                          
 \__/hjw/wba              \___/                           

#2589: TOO HOT REDUX

Wed, 2006 Jul 26

topical

.----------------.                                              
|  _ _   MMMMM   |                                              
| ( " ) | o o |  |     HERE I THOUGHT IT WAS TOO HOT TO JERK OFF
|  `.'   \ - /   |                                              
|  |/  ---`W'--. |                                              
|  |\ |     .-') |                                              
|     |  .-'   ) |     BUT IT TURNS OUT I WAS WRONG             
|     .-'      ) |                                              
|  .-'      .-'  |                                              
| (      .-'     |                                              
| (   .-'  |     |                                              
| (.-'     | \|  |                                              
| '--.M.---  /|  |                                              
|   / - \   .^.  |                                              
|  | o o | ( . ) |    VK                                        
|   WWWWW   " "  |                                              
`----------------'                                              

#2592: PLUTO'S NEW MOONS

Sat, 2006 Jul 29

pluto, topical

                               ::: =,    ;   AND SO IT CAME TO PASS     
                           ;;=;;===      M    THAT PLUTO'S TWO NEWLY    
              ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=              DISCOVERED MOONS WERE    
            :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======      NAMED NYX AND FAGGOT    
           =tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM                          
          ;tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                       
          ;tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM                     
          ,=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM                    
      ..   ,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM                   
     ;;..  ,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM                  
   :;;:;=;,...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM                  
  ;.,:,.....         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;                 
  .......             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM                  
;t ...                .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM                  
,=..                    .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM                    
                         .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB                     
        :VMM               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=                       
       ,;VBM                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::     THAT IAU SURE IS    
   WT  ,,==                      `,,,,,,,        TAKING LIBERTIES LATELY

#2630: STEVE IRWIN WE HARDLY KNEW YE

Tue, 2006 Sep 5

topical

           .-._   _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _                                
.-''-.__.-'00  '-' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '-.     CRIKEY I GUESS I CAN'T  
'.___ '    .   .--_'-' '-' '-' _'-' '._   DANGLE MY INFANT SON IN
 V: V 'vv-'   '_   '.       .'  _..' '.'.  FRONT OF THESE THINGS 
   '=.____.=_.--'   :_.__.__:_   '.   : :   ANYMORE              
           (((____.-'        '-.  /   : :                        
 snd                         (((-'\ .' /                         
                           _____..'  .'                          
                          '-._____.-'                            

#2636: THE PATH TO 9/11

Mon, 2006 Sep 11

topical

                             __..--''\                 
                     __..--''         \                
             __..--''          __..--''                
     __..--''          __..--''       |                
     \ o        __..--''____....----""                 
      \__..--''\                                       
      |         \                                      
     +----------------------------------+              
  OS +----------------------------------+              
                                                       
WHY IS RICHARD CLARKE OBSESSING ABOUT A STAPLER ?!?!?!?
                                                       
  I ALWAYS KNEW THAT GUY WAS A USELESS SHITBAG         

#2642: POOR PLUTO

Sun, 2006 Sep 17

disney, pluto, topical

                               ::: =,    ;                                  
                           ;;=;;===      M                                  
              ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=               BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH         
            :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======         PLUTO BLAH BLAH BLAH     
           =tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM       BLAH BLAH PLANET BLAH  
          ;tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                           
          ;tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM                         
          ,=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM                        
      ..   ,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM                       
     ;;..  ,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM                      
   :;;:;=;,...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM                      
  ;.,:,.....         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;                     
  .......             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM                      
;t ...                .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM                      
,=..                    .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM                        
                         .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB                         
        :VMM               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=                           
       ,;VBM                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::     NOBODY CARES ABOUT PLUTO
   WT  ,,==                      `,,,,,,,         HE WAS A PUNK ANYWAY      
                                               JUST ASK MICKEY              

#2649: SOAP

Sun, 2006 Sep 24

topical

           /^\/^\                                                       
         _|__|  O|    I'M ONE OF THE IN-CROWD EARLY ADOPTER NERD FAGGOTS
\/     /~     \_/ \     SO I DON'T CALL IT "SNAKES ON A PLANE"          
 \____|__________/  \    INSTEAD I CALL IT "SOAP"                       
        \_______      \                                                 
                `\     \                 \                              
             BA   |     |                  \                            
                 /      /                    \                          
                /     /                       \\                        
              /      /                         \ \                      
             /     /                            \  \                    
           /     /             _----_            \   \                  
          /     /           _-~      ~-_         |   |                  
         (      (        _-~    _--_    ~-_     _/   |                  
          \      ~-____-~    _-~    ~-_    ~-_-~    /                   
            ~-_           _-~          ~-_       _-~                    
               ~--______-~                ~-___-~      WHAT DO YOU MEAN 
                                                       THIS JOKE IS OLD 
                                                                        
                             NO WAY "SOAP" WILL LIVE FOREVER !!!!11!1!! 

#2650: MEL GIBSON

Mon, 2006 Sep 25

mel gibson, topical

               .:::.     I'M GLAD MEL GIBSON (EVEN IF DRUNK)     
     .:::.    /:::::\    FINALLY HAD THE COURAGE TO STAND UP     
    /:':':\   |  _  |    AND SAY WHAT WE WERE ALL REALLY THINKING
    |  _  |   | (_` |                                            
    | |_) |   | ,_) |    EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE TO BE POLITICALLY   
    | |   |   |     |    CORRECT AND CONDEMN HIM PUBLICLY WE'RE  
jgs |     |  /`'---'`\   ALL QUIETLY THANKING HIM ON THE INSIDE  
   /`'---'`\ `'-----'`                                           
   `'-----'`             BECAUSE LET'S FACE IT IN OUR SOCIETY    
                         TODAY SUGAR TITS ARE A REAL PROBLEM     

#2657: BURNT COOKIES

Mon, 2006 Oct 2

topical

   .       .                                                       
 +  :      .                                                       
           :       _       A FEMALE ASTRONAUT *WOULD* THINK THAT   
       .   !   '  (_)        SPACE SMELLS LIKE BURNT ALMOND COOKIES
          ,|.'                                                     
-  -- ---(-O-`--- --  -                                            
         ,`|'`.                                                    
       ,   !    .          AFTER ALL SHE'S JUST PREOCCUPIED WITH   
           :       :  "      ALL THE COOKING FOR HER HUSBAND SHE'S 
           .     --+--       GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE UP FOR (BEING IN
 .:        .       !         SPACE AWAY FROM THE KITCHEN AND ALL)  
                                                                   
O!o                                                                

#2660: UNITED STATES HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES PAGE

Thu, 2006 Oct 5

topical

              .__=\__                  .__==__,              
            jf'      ~~=\,         _=/~'      `\,            
        ._jZ'            `\q,   /=~             `\__         
       j5(/                 `\./                  V\\,       
     .Z))' _____              |             .____, \)/\      
    j5(K=~~     ~~~~\=_,      |      _/=~~~~'    `~~+K\\,    
  .Z)\/                `~=L   |  _=/~                 t\ZL   
 j5(_/.__/===========\__   ~q |j/   .__============___/\J(N, 
4L#XXXL_________________XGm, \P  .mXL_________________JXXXW8L
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~YKWmmWmmW@~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                                             
    ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS BACK IN THE DAY WHILE *I* WAS       
    A PAGE FOR THE U.S. HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES AND MATT    
    FOLEY MOLESTED *ME* I KEPT MY MOUTH SHUT AND TOOK IT     
    LIKE A MAN                                               
                                                             
    NOT LIKE THESE DAMN BLABBERMOUTH KIDS THESE DAYS WITH    
    THEIR COMPLAINING TO AUTHORITY FIGURES                   

#2687: TRICK OR TREAT

Wed, 2006 Nov 1

topical

      ___      .-""-.      ___                           
      \  "-.  /      \  .-"  /                           
       > -=.\/        \/.=- <                            
       > -='/\        /\'=- <                            
      /__.-'  \      /  '-.__\                           
 jgs           '-..-'                                    
        ____                                             
      .' /  '.                                           
     /  (  .-'\      I CAN'T BEAT OFF WITH ALL THESE KIDS
    |'.__\/__  |      IN COSTUMES KNOCKING ON MY DOOR    
    |    /\  '.|                                         
     \.-'  )  /                                          
jgs   '.__/_.'                                           
            ____                                         
          .' /:::.                                       
         /  (:::-'\                                      
        |:\__\/__  |                                     
        |::::/\:::\|                                     
         \::'  )::/                                      
 jgs      '.__/::'      ................... OR CAN I     

#2696: BORAT

Fri, 2006 Nov 10

topical

                                       ___                                
                               __..--''    \                              
                      ___..--''             \   MAYBE IF I HEAR THE WORD  
             ___..--''                       \   "BORAT" MORE IT WILL MAKE
     __..--''                                 \    ME NOT HATE IT SO MUCH 
    \                                    __..--\                          
     \                           __..--'' __..--\-._                      
      \                  __..--'' __..--''          '-._                  
       \         __..--'' __..--''                       \                
   _..--\__..--'' __..--''                                |               
 /       \__..--''                      __..__          .'                
|                               __..--''      ''--..__.'                  
\                       __..--''    .:`    `:.    \                       
 \               _..--''          .:`        `:.   |                      
  `.         _.-'                              `:. \                      
    `-.___.-'                   .-=-.               |                     
         /          .-=.       / .--.\      .-=-.   /                     
        /  /       /.-. \     | /####\|    / .--.\  |                     
        |  |      | |  \      \ \####//   | /####\| /                     
         \/ /      \ |         `-.__.`    \ \####//                       
          |/ /      \ \                 `--._...--.                       
           \|  /     `.                            \                      
             \|  /                                 |                      
               \|                                  |                      
                 \        `-._                    /                       
                  `.          `-.._              /                        
                    `.                      _.:`                          
                      `.            __..--''         NOPE DIDN'T WORK     
                        \           /                                     
                   LGB  |          |                                      

#2706: WII

Mon, 2006 Nov 20

topical, wii

                   o                                               
          o       /                                                
           \     /                                                 
            \   /                                                  
             \ /                                                   
        ______________                                             
       |.------------.|  LOOK, I CAN STICK THE WII CONTROLLER UP MY
       ||            ||   ASS AND SWING THE SWORD WITH MY BUTT     
       ||            ||                                            
       ||            ||     WHISH WHISH                            
       ||            ||                                            
       ||____________||_      ISN'T THAT NEAT                      
       |OO ....... OO | `-.                                        
       '------_.-._---' _.'                                        
        _____||   ||___/_                                          
       /  _.-|| N ||-._  \      .-._                               
      / -'_.---------._'- \    ,'___i--i___                        
     /_.-'_  NINTENDO _'-._\  ' /_+  o :::_\                       
    |`-i /m\/m\|\|/=,/m\i-'|  | || \ O / ||                        
akg |  |_\_/\_/___\_/'./|  |  | \/  \ /  \/                        
     `-'              '-.`-'  ,      V                             

#2707: IN VINO VERITAS

Tue, 2006 Nov 21

seinfeld, topical

                     //                                           
                    //                                            
                   //                                             
                  //                                              
           _______||                                              
      ,-'''       ||`-.                                           
     (            ||   )                                          
     |`-..._______,..-'|    I WOULD SAY THAT THE ACTOR WHO PLAYED 
     |            ||   |    KRAMER ON SEINFELD'S CAREER IS NOW    
     |     _______||   |    CLEARLY OVER AFTER HIS LITTLE OUTBURST
     |,-'''_ _  ~ ||`-.|                                          
     |  ~ / `-.\ ,-'\ ~|    BUT THE FACT THAT NOBODY CAN REMEMBER 
     |`-...___/___,..-'|    HIS REAL NAME AND INSTEAD JUST CALLS  
     |    `-./-'_ \/_| |    HIM "KRAMER" KIND OF MAKES IT CLEAR   
     | -'  ~~     || -.|    THAT WAS ALREADY TRUE                 
jrei (   ~      ~   ~~ )                                          
      `-..._______,..-'                                           

#2741: MERRY CHRISTMAS

Mon, 2006 Dec 25

christmas, topical

  \`-  //-  ,   /                                              
 -|\ -'<__//;/`:_'|/   _            |'                         
\=-; |\_,\ [|, _|- _,':'.  .'`      '|  ||        .|           
/`/\-,\_\' `||L.`/|| '|'<|//        |;  ||         |           
 ||`|>=_,|\:_[,\'|\.-`'/,` _', /    '|  ||        ||           
/|.'|\`.-- .-. -,'||.|'_`'|:-/',-'  _j_ |'        |'           
 '| / \|\, [:-' ,/|'||\ |\:'`'-=:' '---''|        '|           
` '-\ ||-:\-\''._ '| ']'\ .\`'..-'''"'  |;-.      |;           
 ' `  -,''|\-:/\-/|.__   /|'.''  /'     '|  `.    '|           
   '/ `\'' ||' [,`'|._     /  //;'      ; .   \   _7_          
  `/| \| \\`.'|\,`_7_ '.  ; '|,        || \\:  \,'---'._       
      / `\'` _,--'---'-.  ; |;|         |  ;|  ; ' "''- `'.    
           ,'        ,  `.| '|;        ||      |      '\\. '   
          /`-'   /    ` .  \ .|       '|'  |:. ;        \\. `\ 
         ' ./   /        `  \  |.      '| ||| |         ''\\ `.
        ; //|   :         \ '.  '.     |;  /'/            ;|  |
        |.;||          |.  | |.        '|  ,' .|         ''   |
        ;\''    `      |'    | `-..___,_j-|`  |:.       .//'  ;
    /    \ \\         .'`   ;       _,'---',_  ||      ''    / 
  _-; -`  \` .      '      /     ,-`'         `. "|.   '    /  
\`-.__.-:' ':\|.,       _,'    ,`,.        .|.  `. '    _.-'   
 '|//-.. .=, '-..___..-'      / /,          ||\   '..--'       
 .\ /':_ ./__,.              .///`           ''\\  \           
; /|=-' `.:, '/_ ,/    .     ;||;               ;|.;           
  | ,` | / -:'::__.-:'       ||``             '' | |           
     /`; / '\'-/==::_<:-,    '`\\.           .//'' ;           
      .' _.'| \`.,-..,-]=.-   \  ``         /''`  /            
            ; ,'| \|.`=:,-..   '.  ._           ,'             
           '  '`|'`]| \_ '-''    '-._'-     _,-'mx             
                '  ' ` |\            `''--'`                   
                                                               
    MY DANGLY THINGS GET REALLY SWOLLEN THIS TIME OF YEAR      

#2744: GERALD FORD

Thu, 2006 Dec 28

jimmy carter, topical

                 _ _.-'`-._ _                 
                ;.'________'.;                
     _________n.[____________].n_________     
    |""_""_""_""||==||==||==||""_""_""_""]    
    |"""""""""""||..||..||..||"""""""""""|    
    |LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI|    
    |.. .. .. ..||..||..||..||.. .. .. ..|    
    |LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI|    
 ,,;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;,;;;,;;;,;;,, 
;;jgs;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
                                              
    FORD: NOT QUITE AS TERRIBLE AS CARTER     

#2746: SADDAM HUSSEIN, R.I.P.

Sat, 2006 Dec 30

topical

     |/|                                   
     |/|                                   
     |/|       BYE SADDAM                  
     |/|                                   
     |/|                                   
     |/|                                   
     |/| /.)                               
     |/|/\/                                
     |/|\/                                 
    (...)                                  
    (...)                                  
    (...)                                  
    (...)                                  
    (...)                                  
    /../\                                  
   / ,^./\                                 
  / /   \/\                                
 / /     \/\                               
( (       )/)                              
| |       |/|                              
| |       |/|                              
| |       |/|       SAY HI TO TOOKIE FOR US
( (       )/)                              
 \ \     / /                               
  \ `---' /                                
   `-----'    PhS                          

#2754: THE DAWN OF A NEW AGE

Sun, 2007 Jan 7

second life, topical, word

         _                                                             
        /\) _                                                          
   _   / / (/\      WANNA CONDUCT AN INTERVIEW IN SECOND LIFE HUH ?????
  /\) ( Y)  \ \                                                        
 / /   ""   (Y )                                                       
( Y)  _      ""                                                        
 ""  (/\       _                                                       
      \ \     /\)                                                      
      (Y )   / /    FROM THIS DAY FORTH WE SHALL HARKEN BACK TO TODAY  
       ""   ( Y)    AS THE DAWN OF A NEW AGE OF PENISGRIEFING          
 Krogg       ""                                                        

#2785: ASTRONAUT CHECKLIST

Wed, 2007 Feb 7

topical

                     <>                                               
       .-"""-.       ||::::::==========   OKAY KIDS HERE'S YOUR       
      /=      \      ||::::::==========   ASTRONAUT CHECKLIST:        
     |- /~~~\  |     ||::::::==========                               
     |=( '.' ) |     ||================     [X] MAPS                  
     \__\_=_/__/     ||================     [X] DIAPERS               
      {_______}      ||================     [X] TRENCHOAT             
    /` *       `'--._||                     [X] WIG                   
   /= .     [] .     { >                    [X] BB GUN                
  /  /|ooo     |`'--'||                     [X] PEPPER SPRAY          
 (   )\_______/      ||                     [X] STEEL MALLET          
  \``\/       \      ||                     [X] KNIFE                 
   `-| ==    \_|     ||                     [X] RUBBER TUBING         
     /         |     ||                     [X] EXTRA BIG PLASTIC BAGS
    |=   >\  __/     ||                                               
    \   \ |- --|     ||                     [ ] A BRAIN IN MY PRETTY  
     \ __| \___/     ||                         LITTLE HEAD           
jgs  _{__} _{__}     ||                                               
    (    )(    )     ||                   OOPS                        
^^~  `"""  `"""  ~^^^~^^~~~^^^~^^^~^^^~                               

#2787: ONE LESS RAFT

Fri, 2007 Feb 9

anna nicole smith, topical

                                                            ---\=,</         
..,.,.,,.,.,.,,.,._,,,____,,,...,.,.,,.....,....,.,..,,.  ,-=--'\\_\/        
""""""""""############z_ _`"""########################' ,---'>__,>,_`-.     |
       :  |  `"""V#######,,_ `-  ""##################' --z--;" /_/  `. `.   |
          |          `/"""".`|`|| } }|.""""""""|"""""  --'//`/'  `    \  '. |
    :          :      |:     ||   |  |  :   :  |   :   ,_\---_\._   :  `.\ |/
                   :  /  :   |  |   || :  :      :    //--'> ___ ``-,_   \  \
         `"^            :  ` ||   || |   :  :         '=-`',' / `-, __`-. |  
      :    :          : :  : |  |    ||    :     ---  //7;<\     / ,--._ ` | 
         .,      :        :  |   ||| || '       :     -/;\'/` -='/|(    \ \  
        %#'            :    `| |||    |  :   :      :  // '\   // | `    | | 
    :         :   `'   :  :  || # | |||    :            `    .        :  |   
                         :   | ||#|#| | ':    :    :             :       `   
         '#"      :   :    : | ||,|, ||   :      /        :           |:  || 
  ""'                    :  \\|\ X XX///`      :|   :    |   :      : |   |  
        :             :  / >\\> <\/\< </</==::_ |' ,`  ,.|_____|______|`--|  
   :         :   |    ,''{` /"^"/'/\^\'"\ --  """==;:zz,,_;__ ,; : , ,,hjm|  
        |'       |`--', ',`--,,_    -_ --.  `--.     __ ""`"=;;--=--=;;-==|| 
        |    ,,--' ''  ,` ,',' ,'`--,._    -=-  /%%\.___     ---          |  
  :     |---'  '  ' ,' ,`` , .'`.,,` , ';'--,._   `-=='  ~~  __ __ _,  ~~ |  
     :,-',' '` `` ,  .`, ,',' ', ` , ,','',`, `'"`--,,_____..__          / | 
,,---',  ' ' , , '  ', , ` ' ,' `, ,  , ` '` ',`,`,` ,',' ',, ,`""'--~',' /  
                                                                             
     ANNA NICOLE SMITH DIED HUH ?!?!?!                                       
                                                                             
     WELL THAT'S ONE PERSON I HAVE TO CROSS OFF MY LIST OF POTENTIAL         
     HUMAN LIFE RAFTS I CAN POTENTIALLY USE WHEN THE EARTH FLOODS            
     OVER COMPLETELY DUE TO GLOBAL WARMING WHICH I'M PRETTY SURE             
     IS GOING TO HAPPEN ANY SECOND ........................ NOW              

#2797: LACROSSE

Mon, 2007 Feb 19

topical

'-.____________________________________________________
                     .::::::::::::::::::::             
                   .::::::::::::::::::::::             
                 .::::::::::::::::::::::::             
               .::::::::::::::::::::::::::             
            |                   |:::::::::             
           .| I WAS RAPED BY    |:::::::::             
         .::| THE DUKE LACROSSE |:::::::::             
       .::::| TEAM !!!!! I MEAN |:::::::::             
     .::::::| NO I WASN'T (LIE) |:::::::::             
   .::::::::|   __         __   |:::::::::             
 .::::::::::|__(  )_______(  )__|:::::::::             
::::::::::::::::\ \ ,~~~~./ /:::::::::::::             
::::::::::::::::| ;`'`'`'; |::::::::::::::             
::::::::::::::::| ;;*( *;; |::::::::::::::             
::::::::::::::::| ;; @  ;; |::::::::::::::             
:::::::::::::::::\||    ||/:::::::::::::::             
::::::::::::::::::( \__/ )::::::::::::::::             
:::::::::::::::::::)    (:::::::::::::::::             
::::::::::::::::::/      \::::::::::::::::             
:::::::::::::::::/________\:::::::::::::::             
:::::::::::::::::/ /::::\ \:::::::::::::::             
::::::::::::::::/ /::::::\ \::::::::::::::             
:::::::::::::::/_/::::::::\_\:::::::::::::             
:::::::::::::(___)::::::::(___)::::::::smd             

#2809: AND NOW A PRESENTATION FROM THE JOHN EDWARDS SECOND LIFE HEADQUARTERS

Sat, 2007 Mar 3

election 2008, second life, topical

       VOTE FOR EDWARDS YOU FUCKING CUNTS
                                         
              /                          
    (   )    /                           
 (   ) (                                 
  ) _   )                                
   ( \_                                  
 _(_\ \)__                               
(____\___)) Krogg98                      

#2810: LIAR, LIAR

Sun, 2007 Mar 4

topical, wikipedia

CHECK ME OUT NEW YORKER !!!!! I'M A DISTINGUISHED WIKIPEDIA         
CONTRIBUTOR WITH FOUR ADVANCED DEGREES AND HAVE TONS OF HARD-WORKING
STUDENTS AND AM IN MY THIRTIES IN A STABLE GAY RELATIONSHIP AND AM  
SO RESPECTED IN THE COMMUNITY THAT I GOT HIRED TO WORK FOR WIKIA,   
THE FOR-PROFIT COUSIN TO WIKIPEDIA !!!!!!!                          
                                                                    
EXCEPT PSYCH !!!!!! NO ACTUALLY I'M A BIG FAT FUCKING LIAR AND I    
HAVE NO DEGREES, NO STUDENTS, AM IN MY TWENTIES, AND I'M NOT IN A   
LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP !!!!!!!!!! BUT I STILL AM GAY !!!!!!!!!!     
                                                                    
AND ALSO STILL EMPLOYED BY WIKIA FOR SOME FUCKING PUZZLING REASON   
                                                                    
IT'S ALMOST AS IF ....... WIKIPEDIA IS A PIECE OF STEAMING SHIT     
AND EVERYONE, INCLUDING JIMBO WALES KNOWS IT AND SO WHY BOTHER      
PRETENDING ANYMORE                                                  
                                                                    
P.S. GO FUCK YOURSELF RUNNING, LIAR                                 
                                                                    
                 _.---.._                                           
    _        _.-'         ''-.                                      
  .'  '-,_.-'                 '''.                                  
 (       _                     o  :                                 
  '._ .-'  '-._         \  \-  ---]                                 
                '-.___.-')  )..-'                                   
                         (_/                  MJP                   
                                                                    
(NOTE: NO ACTUAL MANATEES WERE HARMED IN THE CREATION OF THIS FART) 

#2817: DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME

Sun, 2007 Mar 11

daylight savings, topical

        _____                                                          
     _.'_____`._                                                       
   .'.-'  12 `-.`.   SINCE DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME ISN'T FUCKED UP ENOUGH
  /,' 11      1 `.\   LET'S KIND OF RANDOMLY CHANGE IT JUST TO         
 // 10      /   2 \\   MAKE THINGS MORE DIFFICULT                      
;;         /       ::                                                  
|| 9  ----O      3 ||                                                  
::                 ;;                                                  
 \\ 8           4 //                                                   
  \`. 7       5 ,'/                                                    
   '.`-.__6__.-'.'                                                     
    ((-._____.-))                                                      
    _))       ((_                                                      
   '--'SSt    '--'                                                     

#2818: RIP RICHARD JENI

Mon, 2007 Mar 12

topical

 _                                                                
|_t+.__________________......_  /;_                               
;________________/     :    \ t""o.\__                            
:---|------------------t-----^-`--'  /     RICHARD JENI DIES AT 49
 \__L___________________\____________\                            
              ""-. o .--. \--'/  l  .-t+.                         
                  \ (   l) ;""   : /                              
                   l `--" o;      Y                               
                    """""";:  .-. :\                              
                          ::  '-'  ;\      AMERICA SAYS, "WHO"    
                           ;;      : ;                            
                           :: bug   ;|                            
                           ;'-------';                            
                           '"------""                             

#2827: COMET MCNAUGHT

Wed, 2007 Mar 21

topical

                   .    |     .                                     
                    \   |    /                                      
                `.   \  '   /   .'      I'M A SUNGRAZING COMET      
                  `. .-*""*-. .'                                    
              "*-._ /.*"  "*.\ _.-*"                                
                   : <o>  <o> ; ____    MEANING I LIFT UP THE SUN'S 
              """"':    ..    ;         SKIRT TO SEE WHAT'S GOING ON
              _.-*" \ `.__.' / "*-._    DOWN THERE                  
                  .' `-.__.-' `.                                    
bug             .'   /   .  \   `.                                  
                    /    |   \          MAYBE I SHOULD BE CALLED    
                   '     |    `         PATRICK MCNAUGHTON          

#2830: PLAMEGATE

Sat, 2007 Mar 24

topical

    _                                       
   / }     T VALERIE PLAME SHOW US YOUR TITS
  /'.\                                      
_/ ) (`-                                    
  ( ,)                                      
   |/                                       
  /|                                        
 '  `         Elb                           

#2832: BATTLESTAR GALACTICA

Mon, 2007 Mar 26

battlestar galactica, topical

                                 ,-                                          
                               ,'::|                                         
                              /::::|                                         
                            ,'::::o\                                      _..
         ____........-------,..::?88b                                  ,-' / 
 _.--"""". . . .      .   .  .  .  ""`-._                           ,-' .;'  
<. - :::::o......  ...   . . .. . .  .  .""--._                  ,-'. .;'    
 `-._  ` `":`:`:`::||||:::::::::::::::::.:. .  ""--._ ,'|     ,-'.  .;'      
     """_=--       //'doo.. ````:`:`::::::::::.:.:.:. .`-`._-'.   .;'        
         ""--.__     P(       \               ` ``:`:``:::: .   .;'          
                "\""--.:-.     `.                             .:/            
                  \. /    `-._   `.""-----.,-..::(--"".\""`.  `:\            
                   `P         `-._ \          `-:\          `. `:\           
                                   ""            "            `-._)  -Seal   
                                                                             
    BATTLESTAR GALACTICA SEASON 3:                                           
                                                                             
      NOT JUST JUMPING THE SHARK, BUT SODOMIZING IT, PERFORMING MOUTH        
      TO ANAL, DOUBLE PENETRATION, TWO IN EACH HOLE, THREE IN EACH HOLE,     
      CUTTING IT OPEN AND FUCKING THE WOUND, THEN PUNCHING THE VIEWER        
      IN THE FACE AND FINALLY GOING BACK IN TIME AND DOING IT ALL OVER AGAIN 

#2842: THREE HUNDRED

Thu, 2007 Apr 5

topical

        __                                                                   
      .'  '\._                                                               
      \  @ /;      __                                                        
    ;::'--':;. _ .'  '.                                                      
      :;:: _.'._ \  @ /   I JUST SAW 300                                     
      ;;.-:/ | \:.'--;                                                       
      :___......._ '.     DUDE IT'S TOTALLY AN ALLEGORY ABOUT WHY I HATE BUSH
     {{__..--""-,_'-.:                                                       
    {{[_ _  _  _ _'--.}   SORRY I DIDN'T MEAN ALLEGORY I MEANT SCATTERGORY   
    {[| | || || | |-.]}                                                      
    {[\-'-':-::-:-'/ ]}   MAN SCATTERGORIES IS A FUN GAME                    
    {[  \ \ _\_/ /  ~]}                                                      
    {{[\ .-'    '-./]}}   WOW I'D REALLY LIKE SOME PIE RIGHT NOW             
     {[.:-"'\ /'"-'.]}                                                       
    {['  __/ \__  :]}     HMMM LEMON MERENGUE OR KEY LIME                    
    {[::' _) (_ ' :]}                                                        
   {{[:  : ] [  : :]}     WAIT WHAT WAS I TALKING ABOUT                      
   {[:  : (   )  :]}}                                                        
  {{[: :   '-'   :]}                                                         
   [ : :_.:';.   :]}                                                         
  {{[_.' _ _ _ '-._]}                                                        
   {|\\|~|_|_|_|~| ] }                                                       
jim{{  '""''~~~""--  _'                                                      
     ''""""""""""""''                                                        
        .   |   .                                                            
        -:--|--:-                                                            
        '   |   '                                                            
           _|_                                                               
          |   |                                                              
          \   /                                                              
          /   \                                                              

#2854: THE MORAL OF THE STORY

Tue, 2007 Apr 17

topical

                          _                            
                        _-' "'-,                       
                     _-' | d$$b |                      
                  _-'    | $$$$ |                      
               _-'       | Y$$P |                      
            _-'|         |      |                      
         _-'  _*         |      |                      
      _-' |_-"      __--''\    /                       
   _-'         __--'     __*--'                        
 -'       __-''    __--*__-"`                          
|    _--''   __--*"__-'`                               
|_--"  .--=`"__-||"                                    
|      |  |\\   ||                                     
| .dUU |  | \\ //     I GUESS THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS
| UUUU | _|___//                                       
| UUUU |  |                                            
| UUUU |  |                                            
| UUUU |  |                  DON'T CHEAT ON ME         
| UUUU |  |                                            
| UUUU |  |                                            
| UUP' |  |                                            
|   ___^-"`                                            
 ""'                                                   
 [Matzec]                                              

#2860: HUNGARIAN NOTATION

Mon, 2007 Apr 23

topical

          __..--"""""""""""""""""::|                                   
  __..--""                _..--""  |                                   
.:______________________.:| |      |   AFTER FOISTING THE HORRIBLE     
|       __________      ||| |    ()|   TRAVESTY THAT IS HUNGARIAN      
| __====::::::::::====__||| |()    |   NOTATION ON AN UNSUSPECTING     
||\_____________________||| |      |   AND INNOCENT WORLD I THINK      
|||                     ||| |      |   WE SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT        
|||                     ||| |      |   CHARLES SIMONYI IN SPACE        
|||                     ||| |      |   RATHER THAN BRING HIM BACK      
|||_____________________||| |      |   DOWN HERE SO HE CAN DO MORE     
|||---------------------||| |      |   ANNOYING THINGS IN THE NAME     
||| :-----------------: ||| |      |   OF COMPUTER SCIENCE             
||| |              32x| ||| |      |                                   
||| '"""""""""""""""""' ||| |      |   "HERE CHARLES CHECK IT OUT      
||| o = =       o [] [] ||| |      |   IT'S A NICE LITTLE AIRLOCK      
|||---------------------||| |      |   STEP IN"                        
|||"""""""""""""""""""""||| |      |                                   
|||    |==========|     ||| |      |   SORRY I MEAN                    
|||    | o """  ()|     ||| |      |                                   
|||_____________________||| |      |   "dHERE pnCHARLES vCHECK pIT lOUT
||/_____________________||| |      |   pIT'S iA aNICE aLITTLE nAIRLOCK 
||                      ||| |      |   vSTEP pIN"                      
|'.                    .'|| |      |                                   
| '--__           __--'  || |      |                                   
|      """""""""""       || |      |                                   
|                        || |      |                                   
|                        || |      |                                   
|       |_____|          || |      |                                   
|       (____(|          || |      |                                   
|       |     |          || |      |                                   
|                        || |      |                                   
|       ||   ||          || |      |                                   
|       ((   ((          || |      |                                   
|       ||   ||          || |      |                                   
|                        || |      |                                   
|                        || |      |                                   
|  .: : : : : : : : .    || |    ()|                                   
|  |: : : : : : : : |    || |      |                                   
|  |':':':':':':':':|    || |()    |                                   
|  | '.'.'.'.'.'.'.'|    || |      |                                   
|  |/""""""""""""""";.   || |     .'                                   
|  :      x          '.  || |   .'                                     
|  :      x:          :  || | .'                                       
| ."      x:          ". || :'                                         
|_:____________________:_|:'       grp                                 

#2864: VIRGINIA TECH SHOOTING

Fri, 2007 Apr 27

gun free zones, topical

 +-'~`---------------------------------/\--                 
||"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" \\\\\\  \/~)             
||                                  \\\\\\  \/_             
 |~~~~~~~~-________________-_________________\ ~--_         
 !---------|_________       ------~~~~~(--   )--~~          
                     \ /~~~~\~~\   )--- \_ /(               
                      ||     |  | \   ()   \\               
                      \\____/_ / ()\        \\              
                       `~~~~~~~~~-. \        \\             
                                   \ \  <($)> \\            
                                    \ \        \\           
                                     \ \        \\          
                                      \ \        \\         
                                       \ \  ()    \|        
                                       _\_\__====~~~        
                                                            
                                                            
      JUST THINK THAT IF THE VIRGINIA TECH CAMPUS WERE      
      A GUN-FREE ZONE THIS TRAGEDY WOULD NEVER HAVE ... OOPS
                                                            
      I THINK THIS WHOLE INCIDENT CLEARLY ILLUSTRATES THE   
      NEED FOR A COMPREHENSIVE BAN ON THE SALE OF GUNS AND  
      ALL OTHER POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS MATERIAL TO THE WRONG 
      KIND OF PEOPLE                                        
                                                            
      BECAUSE AS WE KNOW MOST CRIMES ARE COMMITTED BY PEOPLE
      OBEYING THE LAW SO CLEARLY THIS WILL BE EFFECTIVE     

#2912: ROSIE

Thu, 2007 Jun 14

topical

         _.--._                                                     
      ,'        `.                                                  
     /   __) __`  \                                                 
    (   (`-`(-')   )   CAN WE ALL STOP TALKING ABOUT ROSIE O'DONNELL
    /)  \   _  /  (                                                 
   /'    )-._.' .  \ ___     STARTING .......................... NOW
  (  ,--.,    `.)___(___)                                           
   )(   /-.,--'\   _ \X/`                                           
  '/ .'/        \ (  Uu")\                                          
    / /          \ `/,-'  )                                         
   ( ^      ,    ,^ )`._.'                                          
    ( `.   Y   .'  )                                                
     \  `. )\.'   / )                                               
     )`._.'=='._.' (                                                
    /               )   Ojo/VK/FS/ejm                               
   (                ."-.                                            
  /(`    -)        /    \                                           
 (  \`-.__    -'_."      `                                          
 |  \`-.__.--"v"          |                                         
 `.'      \   |,          ,                                         
  /        `._/           :                                         
 /           |           '                                          
/           /|          /                                           
           / |         /                                            

#2929: IPHONE

Sun, 2007 Jul 1

iphone, macintosh, topical

 __i                                                    
|---|                                                   
|[_]|  I'M WAITING IN LINE TO PUNCH PEOPLE WHO ARE      
|:::|   WAITING IN LINE TO BE THE FIRST TO BUY AN IPHONE
|:::|                                                   
`\   \                                                  
  \_=_\ jsm                                             

#2931: VBIED

Tue, 2007 Jul 3

topical

       ____          "VEHICLE-BORNE IMPROVISED EXPLOSIVE DEVICE" ?!?!?!    
    __/___/______                                                          
   |_ \__'   \"_"\   MORE LIKE "VERY BADLY IMPROVISED EXPLOSIVE DEVICE"    
PS `())--,())'-,,'                                                         
                     COME ON YOU ANIMALS SURELY YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THIS

#2976: DEAR JOSE

Fri, 2007 Aug 17

topical

---.----.__..----.----| _|_||___||___||___||___||___||___||_|_ |    
   |        |    |    | -.-..---..---..---..---..---..---..-.- |--.-
---'--.-----'----'--.-|  | ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   || |  | `| 
      |:           (| |  | ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   || |  |--'-
      |:.           | | _|_||___||___||___||___||___||___||_|_ |    
------'----.-.,----.'-| -.-..---..---..---..---..---..---..-.- |-.--
       ,/) |       |  |  | ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   || |  | |` 
----.---8--'--.----'--|  | ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   || |  | |  
    |   8     |:      | _|_||___||___||___||___||___||___||_|_ |-'--
    | ,)//    |:.     | -.-..---..---..---..---..---..---..-.- |:.  
----'-`=;'--.-'-.----.|  | ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   || |  |--.-
      //   /_ _( \    |  | ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   ||   || |  | /| 
---.-//----)/\,'_/----| _|_||___||___||___||___||___||___||_|_ | `| 
   |/|     `;=.(      | -.-..---..---..---..---..---..---..-.- |--'-
(  |`.`.   |`,-/      |,-'-||---||---||---||---||---||---||-'-.|    
-`-'-.`.`-.';'=`.-..--'-.--------.-------------.--.-------.----'--.-
     |  `-./.}{-'\.)    |        )             |   `)     |       \ 
     |    :`-}{-''||    |:.      |   ,_        |          |:.     | 
---'`'-.--|`-}{-'||)----'-.------'--'.,`--.----'--------.-'-------'-
       |  :`-`'-'/)|      |               |:.           |           
-.-----'--;`.}{,`.||----,-'--------.------'---.--------,'--.,-------
 |:     ,'/.`..'_(/(    |:         |          |             \       
 |:.  ,',' |`--`.('))   |:.        |          |             |:      
-'--,' <.._|__,. >`,----'----------'--------.,'-------------'----SSt
    ``----....(','                                                  
           _,'>'                                                    
           )/      DEAR JOSE PADILLA                                
           `'                                                       
                 HAVE FUN IN PRISON                                 
                                                                    
               HOPE YOU LIKE THE RAPE                               
                                                                    
             SIGNED, 300 MILLION PEOPLE                             

#2988: LUNAR ECLIPSE

Wed, 2007 Aug 29

topical

         ___---___                                  
      .--         --.                               
    ./   ()      .-. \.                             
   /   o    .   (   )  \                            
  / .            '-'    \    OH GOD OH GOD          
 | ()    .  O         .  |                          
|                         |                         
|    o           ()       |                         
|       .--.          O   |                         
 | .   |    |            |                          
  \    `.__.'    o   .  /    WHO STEPPED ON THE MOON
   \                   /                            
    `\  o    ()      /' jgs                         
      `--___   ___--'                               
            ---                                     

#2989: OWEN WILSON

Thu, 2007 Aug 30

topical

                                      POOR OWEN WILSON !!!!!!!!!111111111  
   emmmmmm~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\                                       
    """"""|_____                    )  I'M RICH AND FAMOUS AND WELL-LIKED  
Elijah          """""""""--------"""   AND FUNNY AND GET GIRLS !!!! BOO-HOO
                                                                           
                                      NOW IF WE CAN ONLY GET BEN AFFLECK   
                                      TO FOLLOW SUIT WE'RE IN BUSINESS     

#3009: DON'T TAZ ME

Wed, 2007 Sep 19

topical

                          __....__                                    
                        :._  .-:::::::::" .:                          
                        '::""::::::::::::::'                          
                      .-""":::_:::::::::::'/;                         
                     .:-._.::| ""-::::;'|:;/.--.                      
                   .:::::::-"'-._o.--.o-': . ':::.                    
               _.=::::::"  .-":  ":..::   .   ::::.                   
             -:::::::::|    .(     'T'  -._.  ::::::.                 
            -:::::::/::'      |T--"""""--:|  .:::::::::.              
     ...    .:::::'.::|       ':         :'  ::''':::::;.             
     ':::. .:::::' :::'                     :'     "::::;             
        :: ::::'   ::|                     .:        ::::.            
 .:::::. :::::'    ::|                     :'        '::::            
:::':::::::::' ... ::|               __.' .:          ':::.     ..:::.
 '    "::::::::::' :::.            ""     :'           ':::   .:::::''
        ':''::''   '::|                  .:            .:::..::::..   
                    ::|                 .:            .:::::''':::::. 
                    ::|                .:         ':::::''       '''  
                    ::|               .:'           '''               
                    :::.            .:'                               
                   .:::|          .::'                                
                   ::::|        .::::.                                
               ._.::::::.    ..:::::::.     DON'T TAZ ME, BRO!!!      
               '::::::::::'''':::::::::                               
                 '':::::'      ':::::::.                              
                 .::::'          ::::::'                              
                 '':::.         .::::'                                
            ....    ':::.      .:::'     ....                         
           ::::::::::::::'    '::::::::::::::::.                      
           '::::::::::'''       '''''':::::::::'                      

#3018: DAWN LAUNCH

Fri, 2007 Sep 28

topical

      |    DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH  
     / \    DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH 
    / _ \    DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH
   |.o '.|   DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH
   |'._.'|   DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH DAWN LAUNCH
   |     |                                                              
 ,'|  |  |`.                                                            
/  |  |  |  \          CORK IT GUYS, NO ONE CARES AT THIS POINT         
|,-'--|--'-.| l42                                                       

#3025: BASEBALL TEAM NAMES

Fri, 2007 Oct 5

topical

      _--_     dMb                                                    
   __(._  )   d0P   THE LOS ANGELES ANGELS OF ANAHEIM 3               
     <  (D)  .MP                                                      
   .~ \ /~```M-.    THE LONG BEACH ARMADA OF LOS ANGELES OF CALIFORNIA
 .~    V    Mo_ \   OF THE UNITED STATES OF NORTH AMERICA INCLUDING   
 (   (___. {:)-./   BARROW, ALASKA 2                                  
  ~._____.(:}                                                         
   /     .M\        COMMON SENSE 0                                    
  /      "" \                                                         
  |    /\   |                                                         
  /   /  \   \                                                        
 /   /    \   \                                                       
 \__/      \__/                                                       
 / /        | |                                                       
.^V^.      .^V^.                                                      
 +-+        +-+                                                       

#3057: THE FIFTH OF NOVEMBER

Tue, 2007 Nov 6

election 2008, ron paul, topical

         ,,,,,                                                          
         \ e e\                                                         
         C  _\/    |\\,   I HOPE WE'RE ALL TAKING TIME OUT              
          )\_)    \_ /     TO CONTRIBUTE TO RON PAUL'S CAMPAIGN !!!!!   
        _/|/_     _//                                                   
      ,'\ ~ /'-,_/  \                                                   
     /   \_/    /   /   BECAUSE THERE'S NO BETTER FEELING THAN          
    ,  |     \_._,-"     FLUSHING YOUR HARD-EARNED MONEY DOWN THE TOILET
   (  <     _'                                                          
   |   \     \                                                          
   ', -',-~.-'                                                          
   _/  )     |                                                          
    |//   |  '                                                          
      '   )  |                                                          
      |   |  |                                                          
   ._.,   -  |.,_ //                                                    
_\-'  )___|__|_    '-._                                                 
b'ger  /____\__\                                                        

#3060: DOG CHAPMAN

Fri, 2007 Nov 9

topical

    _"_ %                                        
    (<  ?                                        
     ` "      BOUNTY HUNTERS AREN'T SUPPOSED     
    __||___    TO FUCKING CRY LIKE LITTLE BITCHES
   |\___//_\                                     
   (' | ') \\                                    
 __|\ , /  |/                                    
/:  /   \  ::                                    
\| ######o /|                                    
  ######## \)                                    
  ########                                       
   \ :  /                                        
    \: /                                         
     --                                          
     %%%                                         
      %%                                         
       %                                         
      /:\                                        
     |/|, b'ger                                  

#3070: BEE MOVIE

Mon, 2007 Nov 19

topical

                                                                    
`>.___    o-.--.-o    ___,<'                                        
 /    `.   / ,, \   .'    \                                         
{       `.; ,__, ;.'       }                                        
 `._      }`.__.'{      _.'                                         
    `,=."'        `".=,'       BLAH BLAH FUCKING BEE MOVIE BLAH BLAH
   .'   /`-.____.-'_   `,                                           
   \_.';`-.______.-':`._/                                           
       `+-.______.-''                                               
         `-.____.-'                                                 
          /  ||  \                                                  
         ;   ;;   ;                                                 
         `-./  \.-'     fsc                                         

#3074: HAPPY THANKSGIVING 2007

Fri, 2007 Nov 23

topical

          ____                                        
         /    \                                       
        /______\                                      
    ___/___[_]__\___                                  
      (_/ _. ._\_)                                    
     (_/    _\  \_)                                   
    (_(   .___.  )                                    
       \_      _/                                     
     __/_\____/_\__                                   
   .'     \    /   `.                                 
   |       \__/      |                                
   |   |     |   |   |                                
   |   |     |   |   |                                
   |   |     |   |   |                                
   |   |     |   |   |                                
   |   |     |   |   |        ______________________  
   |___|     |   |___|       /                      \ 
   /  |      /    |  \       |  FUCK YOU FAGGOT I   | 
   \__|_____/\____| \/       | DON'T THINK YOU HAVE | 
      |____[__]___|\ \_/\    | THE STONES FOR THIS  | 
      |           | \/   |   \__  __________________/ 
      |     |     | / ()/       |/                    
      |     |     |/   /                              
      |     |     |\__/    _.--.                      
      |     |     |        \o   `      .-.-..-.       
      |     |     |        .'  .' .--. |      /       
      |     |     |       ;   (_.'    `|     /        
_____ |     |     | _____ .   .      . |    /___jro___
      |_____|_____|       `.   `.    ;  \  /          
      /    | |    \         `-.  `--'    .'           
   _[]     | |     []_         `-. .'. .'             
  /        | |        \          || ||                
  `----""--' `--""----'          /|\|\                

#3084: LOSER

Mon, 2007 Dec 3

islam, topical

  .._                                
 ;   ;                               
;     :                              
:\     ;                             
 \\    :                             
  :\    ;    _.--"""--.___           
   :;    '-.' ,="   "-=,`."-,        
    '.    ;="           " ;  '-.     
      '-.;      _..._      ;    '-.  
         :   .-. ___ .-.   ;       \ 
        ;    ;.-".-."-.;    ;       :
        ;   .'  '._.'  '.   ;`,__.-.'
        ;   ;    _,_    ;   ;  `--"  
         ;  '..-"   "-,.'  ;         
          '.  `-.___.-'  .'          
    __..--" `-.__   __.-' "--..__    
 .-"           /,\""/,\          "-. 
;  __..    ,  :",:@:=,"; ,    ..__  ;
'._   __.-,"  '.'/  \'.' ",-.__   _.'
   """   ;,     "    "    ,;   """   
         ; .             , :         
        ;   '   LOSER   '   ;        
       ;                    :        
     .-"".  `.   ',   ."  .""-.      
    /,""-.'.  '. ;  .'  .'.-"",\     
   :: '   ; ;  ; __ ;  : :   ' :;    
   ;;     ; ;  /'  '\  ; ;     ;:    
   :'.    : ;,'      ',: :    .';    
    \ '._/ ;            ; \_.' /     
     `-._.'              '._.-'   fsc

#3112: POST HOC ERGO PROPER HOC

Mon, 2007 Dec 31

topical

                      __,,,,_                                         
       _ __..-;''`--/'/ /.',-`-.     TIME TO MASTURBATE               
   (`/' ` |  \ \ \\ / / / / .-'/`,_     (TO KEEP THE TIGERS AWAY)     
  /'`\ \   |  \ | \| // // / -.,/_,'-,                                
 /<7' ;  \ \  | ; ||/ /| | \/    |`-/,/-.,_,/')                       
/  _.-, `,-\,__|  _-| / \ \/|_/  |    '-/.;.\'                        
`-`  f/ ;      / __/ \__ `/ |__/ |                                    
     `-'      |  -| =|\_  \  |-' |   IT'S ALWAYS WORKED BEFORE I SEE  
           __/   /_..-' `  ),'  //     NO REASON THIS TREND WON'T     
       fL ((__.-'((___..-'' \__.'        CONTINUE INTO THE LGHA LIHYSL
                                           OH GOD MY SPLEEN GLALIY SKH
                                             AGLZAIE ILKHR LKHSDFLKIS 

#3123: HEADBUTTS

Fri, 2008 Jan 11

soccer, topical

    _,...,_                                                   
  .'@/~~~\@'.    EVEN HEADBUTTS CANNOT KEEP ME WATCHING SOCCER
 //~~\___/~~\\                                                
|@\__/@@@\__/@|                                               
|@/  \@@@/  \@|                                               
 \\__/~~~\__//                                                
  '.@\___/@.'  jgs                                            
    `"""""`                                                   

#3131: BOBBY FISCHER

Sat, 2008 Jan 19

topical

                  +  \\^//       ~~                          
1 III  ,o/  </>  [#]  (#)  </>  ,o/  III 1                   
 _[#]__[#]__(#)_[_#_](_#_)_(#)__[#]__[#]_                    
      :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::     SEARCHING FOR  
2  _    _    _    _         _    _    _  2    BOBBY FISCHER'S
 _(#)__(#)__(#)__(#)_     _(#)__(#)__(#)_     CORPSE         
 :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                         
3:::::     :::::     :::::     :::::     3                   
 :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                         
      :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                    
4     :::::     :::::  _  :::::     :::::4                   
      :::::     :::::_(#)_:::::     :::::                    
 :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                         
5:::::     :::::     :::::     :::::     5                   
 :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                         
      :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                    
6     :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::6                   
      :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                    
 :::::     :::::     :::::     :::::                         
7  _    _    _    _    _    _    _    _  7                   
 _(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)_                    
                  +  \\^//                                   
8 III  ,o/  </>  [ ]  ( )  </>  ,o/  III 8                   
 _[_]__[_]__(_)_[___](___)_(_)__[_]__[_]_                    
   H    G    F    E    D    C    B    A                      

#3134: I CAN'T QUIT

Tue, 2008 Jan 22

brokeback mountain, topical

  I CAN'T QUIT Y--                        
                                          
               .-~*~--,.   .-.            
       .-~-. ./OOOOOOOOO\.'OOO`9~~-.      
     .`OOOOOO.OOM.OLSONOOOOO@@OOOOOO\     
    /OOOO@@@OO@@@OO@@@OOO@@@@@@@@OOOO`.   
    |OO@@@WWWW@@@@OOWWW@WWWW@@@@@@@OOOO). 
  .-'OO@@@@WW@@@W@WWWWWWWWOOWW@@@@@OOOOOO}
 /OOO@@O@@@@W@@@@@OOWWWWWOOWOO@@@OOO@@@OO|
lOOO@@@OO@@@WWWWWWW\OWWWO\WWWOOOOOO@@@O.' 
 \OOO@@@OOO@@@@@@OOW\     \WWWW@@@@@@@O'. 
  `,OO@@@OOOOOOOOOOWW\     \WWWW@@@@@@OOO)
   \,O@@@@@OOOOOOWWWWW\     \WW@@@@@OOOO.'
     `~c~8~@@@@WWW@@W\       \WOO|\UO-~'  
          (OWWWWWW@/\W\    ___\WO)        
            `~-~''     \   \WW=*'         
                      __\   \             
                      \      \            
                       \    __\    	KERPOW
                        \  \              
                         \ \              
                          \ \             
                           \\             
                            \\            
                             \            
                              \           
                                          
                                          
  HUHHHHHHHHHHHH (EXPIRES)                

#3136: THOMPSON '08

Thu, 2008 Jan 24

election 2008, law and order, topical

         ,,,,,                               
         \ e e\                              
         C  _\/    |\\,                      
          )\_)    \_ /     THOMPSON '08      
        _/|/_     _//                        
      ,'\ ~ /'-,_/  \                        
     /   \_/    /   /                        
    ,  |     \_._,-"                         
   (  <     _'                               
   |   \     \                               
   ', -',-~.-'                               
   _/  )     |                               
    |//   |  '                               
      '   )  |                               
      |   |  |             WHAT              
   ._.,   -  |.,_ //                         
_\-'  )___|__|_    '-._    OH                
b'ger  /____\__\                             
                           WATERSTON '08 THEN

#3148: RIGHTS REVOKED

Tue, 2008 Feb 5

election 2008, topical

      ___________                                                     
      \         /                                                     
       )_______(                                                      
       |"""""""|_.-._,.---------.,_.-._                               
       |       | | |               | | ''-.                           
       |       |_| |_             _| |_..-'                           
       |_______| '-' `'---------'` '-'                                
       )"""""""(                                                      
      /_________\   IN THE PRIMARIES LET'S VOTE FOR PEOPLE WHO'VE     
      `'-------'`    ALREADY CLEARLY DROPPED OUT SHOWING THAT WE'RE   
    .-------------.   NOT EVEN PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT'S GOING ON AND
jgs/_______________\   THUS SHOULD HAVE OUR VOTING RIGHTS REVOKED     

#3158: NORTHERN ILLINOIS UNIVERSITY SHOOTING

Fri, 2008 Feb 15

gun free zones, topical

  .---.   .---.                                                
,';'   `.';'   `..                                             
f               :Bo.        SIX SHOT DEAD INCLUDING GUNMAN !!!!
`               d88:                                           
 `\           /d88P'                                           
   `\     ; /d888P'                                            
     `.  ',d8&8P'                                              
       : ;d8&7'         LET'S HEAR IT FOR GUN FREE ZONES       
        | :8:             BECAUSE CLEARLY THEY REALLY WORK     
           |  qx                                               

#3163: TO MRS. OBAMA

Wed, 2008 Feb 20

election 2008, obama, please shut up*, topical

              __________                  __,___/  ",",       
       ___.--"          "\'.         ____/  l   \    ",'-,    
------f"               // \\\        \  (l\ \    \     \ \",  
      |                    |||       /   u       |      \ \ \ 
      |                    |||     _ )          /       | |  \
  ----L_-XXX-.             .|'    / U          <        | |  |
              "\   -<_____///     \           6 )       | |  |
                \___)     -"       '.       -.<"       / /   |
                                    |'.___  |       _._."   / 
  DEAR MRS. OBAMA                   |     ./     _."."   _."  
  PLEASE SHUT UP                   /      |"----"     _."     
  SIGNED, MR. OBAMA             jjs       \                   

#3164: TO MR. CLINTON

Thu, 2008 Feb 21

election 2008, hillary clinton, please shut up*, topical

              __________                  __,___/  ",",       
       ___.--"          "\'.         ____/  l   \    ",'-,    
------f"               // \\\        \  (l\ \    \     \ \",  
      |                    |||       /   u       |      \ \ \ 
      |                    |||     _ )          /       | |  \
  ----L_-XXX-.             .|'    / U          <        | |  |
              "\   -<_____///     \           6 )       | |  |
                \___)     -"       '.       -.<"       / /   |
                                    |'.___  |       _._."   / 
  DEAR MR. CLINTON                  |     ./     _."."   _."  
  PLEASE SHUT UP                   /      |"----"     _."     
  SIGNED, MRS. CLINTON          jjs       \                   

#3203: EARTH HOUR 2008

Mon, 2008 Mar 31

topical

        ___                                                       
    .-"`   `"-.    EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR    
  .'    .-.    '.    EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR  
 /     (/^\)     \    EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR 
/  #   (\ /)      \   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR 
| #    .-'-.      |   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR 
|     /(_I_)\     |   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR 
;     \\) (//     ;   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR 
 ;     / Y \     ;   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR  
  \    \ | /    /   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR   
   \    \|/    /   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR    
    \   /|\   /   EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR EARTH HOUR     
     |  \|/  |                                                    
     |__/Y\__|                                                    
     {=======}    WATCH US INCREASE THE EFFICIENCY OF ENERGY USAGE
     }======={    BY APPROXIMATELY ONE THOUSANDTH OF ONE PERCENT  
     {=======}    AND YET PRETEND WE'RE DOING SOMETHING USEFUL    
     }======={    OTHER THAN JERKING OURSELVES OFF                
  jgs{=======}                                                    
      `""u""`                                                     

#3236: IRON MAN

Sat, 2008 May 3

topical

    ,         ,                                            
   /|   _,_   |\                                           
  | \.'` \ `'./ |                                          
  | /   /`>   \ |    WHY IS IRON MAN SUCKING DICK FOR CRACK
  ; | / |o| \ | ;                                          
   \_\ /.8.\ /_/                                           
_.-' .'/   \'. '-._                                        
\__.'  |   | `;.__/                                        
  / |  | ; |  | \                                          
  |  \ '._.'  | |                                          
   \  \ | |  /  /                                          
   |  | | | /  /                                           
   |  | | | |  |                                           
   \  \ | |/  /                                            
    \  \| /  /                                             
 jgs `\ \ | /                                              
       \ `;/                                               
       `| |                                                

#3243: REISERFS

Sat, 2008 May 10

topical

      \                                                                
\      \               .`---.                                          
 \      \__________ __/   _  \                                         
  \              |      ;(_-\_\                                        
   \             \  ___,_:_C)  "-._                                    
    '_____________\_,' / | \       "-._                                
                      /  |  \     `    /                               
                     /   |   \     \  /                                
                    /    |    \     \/                                 
                    \b   |     \    |                                  
                     \n  |      \  /                                   
                      \i |       \/    I THINK I'D BETTER STOP USING   
                       \ |       /    REISERFS BECAUSE SHIT THAT       
                        \       /    PRACTICALLY MAKES ME AN ACCOMPLICE
                         \     /                                       
                          \   /                                        
                           \ /                                         
                            V                                          

#3248: TORN

Thu, 2008 May 15

election 2008, topical

    ____________                                             
   /     _.'\   \    AS A DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY VOTER I'M TORN  
  /   _.'    \   \    BETWEEN BEING LABELLED SEXIST OR RACIST
 /_.-'        \___\                                          
|\_\ ``   .-   \ _/|                                         
|  _\___________.  | P                                       
| /              \ | r                                       
|/                \| 5                                       
|__________________| 9                                       

#3255: THE REHABILITATION ACT

Thu, 2008 May 22

topical

   ||====================================================================||
   ||//$\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\//$\\||
   ||(100)==================| FEDERAL RESERVE NOTE |================(100)||
   ||\\$//        ~         '------========--------'                \\$//||
   ||<< /        /$\              // ____ \\                         \ >>||
   ||>>|  12    //L\\            // ///..) \\         L38036133B   12 |<<||
   ||<<|        \\ //           || <||  >\  ||                        |>>||
   ||>>|         \$/            ||  $$ --/  ||        One Hundred     |<<||
||====================================================================||>||
||//$\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\//$\\||<||
||(100)==================| FEDERAL RESERVE NOTE |================(100)||>||
||\\$//        ~         '------========--------'                \\$//||\||
||<< /        /$\              // ____ \\                         \ >>||)||
||>>|  12    //L\\            // ///..) \\         L38036133B   12 |<<||/||
||<<|        \\ //           || <||  >\  ||                        |>>||=||
||>>|         \$/            ||  $$ --/  ||        One Hundred     |<<||   
||<<|      L38036133B        *\\  |\_/  //* series                 |>>||   
||>>|  12                     *\\/___\_//*   1989                  |<<||   
||<<\      Treasurer     ______/Franklin\________     Secretary 12 />>||   
||//$\                 ~|UNITED STATES OF AMERICA|~               /$\\||   
||(100)===================  ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS =================(100)||   
||\\$//\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\$//||   
||====================================================================||   
                                                                           
             DEFACING ALL MY CASH WITH BRAILLE OBSCENITIES                 

#3386: MARKETS

Tue, 2008 Sep 30

topical

                __               _|_                                     
               |+-==|         .'.':`.`.                                  
          |    |+--=|        / /  |  \ \  NOM NOM NOM STOCK MARKET EQUITY
         /'\   '+ -=|        ^^^^^^^^^^^                                 
        //|\\      =|   &C   O__u |  u O~                                
      O ^^^^^           /\_u/\/uuu|uuu\/\                                
 &C  /|\_@|   C__@     /)  ( '--------' ,|                               
 /\_ \@@@@|@@\/\      /_|   \_\   |    /_|           |                   
( ( `,o--------')      /|   / |  /|\   |\           /'\                  
/__\ /`'  |   <|                        _|_        //|\\                 
/|  />   /|\   \`                    .'.':`.`.     ^^^^^                 
                                    / /  |  \ \    %%|%%  O              
                 _|_                ^^^^^^^^^^^   %%%|%%%_/\\            
              .'.':`.`.             C_/  |       '-------'  )            
             / /  |  \ \         d}<|8888|888  {b    |     / \           
             ^^^^^^^^^^^     _888/\_88888|8888_/\   /|\    |  \          
      ~C          |   O      '--|(-------+----' ,|                       
      /),\_ O     | \/|\/    |  |_\ | \  |    |/_(                       
   o /( )  /|\####|###### O  |   | \    /|\   | \\                       
  (`' )_(  \|'-----------'/\\                                            
  /\  / |   |\    |  _o  /  )                                            
            |/   /|\  (`'  /|                                            
                      />   \ \ ejm                                       

#3389: WALL STREET/MAIN STREET

Fri, 2008 Oct 3

topical

                                                                        
 EET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL ST
 REET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL S
 TREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL 
 STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL
  STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WAL
 L STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WA
 LL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET W
 ALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STRE ______________
 WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL ST |##############
 REET MAIN ST __  ALL STREE  __   N STREET WALL STREET M |##############
_____________|  |_____  A  _(   )  IN STREET WALL STREET |##############
UUUUUUUUUUUUU|__|UUUUU| ,-'      )_  MAIN STREET WALL ST |##############
UUU_UUUUUU_UUUUUU_UUUU|(   (  /    )  REET MAIN STREET W |   __   __   _
UU|_|UUUU|_|UUUU|_|UUU|.  \   )  _) ) ALL STREET MAIN ST |  |  | |  | | 
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU| `.  .    )  ) REET WALL STREET M |  |__| |__| |_
======================|(_   |  )  _) AIN STREET WALL STR |              
     __     __    __  |(__(_|____)_______________________|   __   __   _
|   |__|   |__|  |__| |uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu,'.uuu|  |  | |  | | 
|   |__|   |__|  |__| |uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu,'   `.u|  |__| |__| |_
======================|uuuu_uuuuuu_uuuuuu_uuuuu,'__   __`.              
     __     __    __  |uuu| |uuuu| |uuuu| |uuuu||  | |  ||   __   __   _
|   |__|   |__|  |__| |uuu|_|uuuu|_|uuuu|_|uuuu||__| |__||  |  | |  | | 
|   |__|   |__|  |__| |=_====__================'         |  |__| |__| |_
======================||  | |  |  __   __   __   __   __ |______________
  ___  __    ________ ||__| |__| |  | |  | |  | |  | |  ||+++++++++++++_
||_|_||  |  |  |     || _______  |__| |__| |__| |__| |__||++.-------.+| 
||_|_||- |  | -|     |||   |   |                         |++|   |   |+|_
 |_|_||  |  |  |_____|||   |o  |  _     ____________  _  |++|   |-  |+++
---. _|--|__|--|_____|||===|   |_|_|_  /_|__|_______| _|_|++|___|___|+++
----`. ___             ;---'---'      |  |_-|       |__     |       \   
--(_)-'_ _\___________/________|____/_'-(_)-----(_)-' _\____|________\__
jrei____________________________________________________________________
                                                                        
 EET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL ST
 REET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL S
 TREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL 
 STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL
  STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WAL
 L STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WA
 LL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET W
 ALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET 
 WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET
  WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREET WALL STREET MAIN STREE

#3415: INFLATION

Wed, 2008 Oct 29

topical

       .__  _..._                                       
       /,-./'.--. ``\.                                  
     /|/.--./`.o/ /`;\\                                 
     |||\  _ `-'_` o|/||                                
     ||\\`.`.__`Y8P_,\||   HOORAY INFLATION             
     \\||  `"\"""/---'||                                
      \\|  ,-'   `.||//                                 
       \(-'_        `.                                  
     ,-'  [_]    .-.  \     THE FED SHOULD NOT BE LOWER 
    ;   `\| ||-'/   `  \     THAN MY BLOOD ALCOHOL LEVEL
     \ /`""-.`\ |    ;  |                               
      `.-|\_/ | ;    '  |                               
        \-._ /  |    | /                                
        |`--'| :     ;_\_                               
       /|    |/     /\|, )                              
  __..; `----'     :`.`|/                               
 /   /       |     |                                    
;  .'      `\'     ;                                    
 \/          :  _  :                                    
 :          /     / :                                   
 :       _.'`.__.'  |   fsc                             
  \   _.'      \   /                                    
   |   |       /   `---.._                              
   |   `\     `.____      \                             
  /      |          `------'                            
  \__|_,'                                               

#3419: KNIGHT RIDER

Sun, 2008 Nov 2

topical

                  _..-------++._              
              _.-'/ |      _||  \"--._        
        __.--'`._/_\j_____/_||___\    `----.  
   _.--'_____    |          \     _____    /  
 _j    /,---.\   |        =o |   /,---.\   |_ 
[__]==// .-. \\==`===========/==// .-. \\=[__]
  `-._|\ `-' /|___\_________/___|\ `-' /|_.'  
hjw     `---'                     `---'       
                                              
I DON'T CARE WHAT ANY OF YOU SAY I'M NOT GOING
TO LET THE CURRENT FINANCIAL CRISIS RUIN      
MY APPRECIATION OF THE NEW KNIGHT RIDER REMAKE

#3429: JOE

Wed, 2008 Nov 12

election 2008, topical

    .------.         .------.                       
  .'      //`.     .'        `.                     
 /       //   \   /            \    MY BALLS ARE JOE
|       //     : |    ......:::::                   
:      //      | :::::''''''    |                   
 \    //      /   \            /                    
  `._//    _.'     `._      _.'  AsH                
    `"----"'         `"----"'                       

#3453: A TERRIBLE T-SHIRT IDEA

Sat, 2008 Dec 6

topical

            .-"''-.  _                                         
          .'       `( \                                        
        @/            ')   ,--,__,-"                           
        /        /      \ /     /   _/                         
      __|           ,   |/         /                           
    .~  `\   / \ ,  |   /                                      
  .~      `\    `  /  _/   _/   I SHOPPED AT WAL-MART AND ALL I
.~          `\  ~~`__/    /      GOT WAS THIS LOUSY MISCARRIAGE
~             `--'/                                            
             /   /    /                                        
            /  /'    /jgs                                      

#3458: GAY FOR A DAY

Thu, 2008 Dec 11

topical

             __)),                                               
            //_ _)                                               
            ( "\"   IT SURE DOES NOT SEEM LIKE A COINCIDENCE     
             \_-/      THAT IT'S THE END OF "GAY FOR A DAY" DAY  
         ,---/  '---.    AND MY BUTT SURE IS SORE                
        /     - -    \                                           
       /  \_. _|__,/  \                                          
      /  )\        )\_ \                                         
     / _/  (   '  ) /  /                                         
    / |     (_____) | /                                          
   /,'      /     \/ /,                                          
 _/(_      (   ._, )-'                                           
`--,/      |____|__|                                             
           |    )  |                                             
           |   /   |                                             
           |  / \  |   I HOPE IT'S JUST FROM SITTING ALL DAY     
          / `|  | _)     AND NOT OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD     
          |  |  |  |                                             
          |  /  \  |                                             
          | |    \ |       I THOUGHT I WAS JUST GETTING A DAY OFF
          | \    | \_                                            
   gnv   /__(    '-._`,                                          

#3459: LOUSY T-SHIRT

Fri, 2008 Dec 12

oj simpson, topical

     __.-.__.-.__                                                         
   .'\ '-.__.-' /'.                                                       
  /  |    ,_    |  \                                                      
 /   |  _/| \_  |   \                                                     
 '-._/ \.-""-./ \_.-'                                                     
     | ( ^ \^ ) |                                                         
     |  \ == /  |   I RAPED O.J. SIMPSON IN PRISON AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS 
     |  /'--'\  |   VERY NICE GOLDEN PLAQUE FROM THE BROWN FAMILY ACTUALLY
jgs  |          |                                                         
     '._      _.'                                                         
        `""""`                                                            

#3460: BLAGOJEVICH

Sat, 2008 Dec 13

blog, topical

          . '.'.*.     .*.'.' .                                 
        *. '. \ \ *   * / / .' .*                               
     *._  '. \*88888 88888*/ .'  _.*                            
   *._  '-. *8*___~*8*~___*8* .-'  _.*                          
 *    '--.8.-~`   ~-Y-~   `~-.8.--'    *                        
  '--.___*/  .----.   .----.  \*___.--'                         
    *    8|  \____/ _ \____/  |8   *                            
jgs  '---.|\       / \       /.---'                             
          ||'-----'   '-----'                                   
          ||                                                    
          ||   *BLAGOJEVICH* SURE SOUNDS A LOT LIKE *BLOG* TO ME
          ||                                                    
          ||                                                    
          ||                                                    
          ||                                                    
          ||   AND THAT'S NEVER GOOD                            
          |/                                                    

#3480: DEAR BAILOUT BEGGARS

Fri, 2009 Jan 2

bailout, topical

            $$ $                                                 
             \O/$                                                
            $ |                                                  
             /_\          DEAR BAILOUT BEGGARS:                  
           _|___|_                                               
         _|___|___|_       THANKS FOR MAKING IT THAT MUCH HARDER 
       _|___|___|___|_      FOR THE REST OF US TO ARGUE THAT     
     _|___|___|___|___|_     CAPITALISM ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW, WORKS
   _|___|___|___|___|___|_                                       
 _|___|___|___|___|___|___|_                                     
|___|___|___|___|___|___|___|                                    
 \o/ \o/ \o/ \o/ \o/ \o/ \o/                                     
  |   |   |   |   |   |   |                                      
 / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \                                     
hjm                                                              

#3481: DOWN MY GULLET

Sat, 2009 Jan 3

topical

 ,-----------------.                                                       
 |                 |                                                       
 |         :       |   IF I CALL HIM "BLAGO" DOES THAT MAKE ME COOL ?!??!?!
 |            :    |                                                       
 |   :   :         |                                                       
 | ,-----.  :      |                                                       
 | %%%%%%%    :    |                                                       
 | #######  :    : |                                                       
 | %%%%%%%    )    |                                                       
 | |     | ( ( (   |                                                       
 | |     |  ) . )  |                                                       
 | |&    | ( ( : : |                                                       
 | (&$   `-.  )    |                                                       
 |  `.  $&& `.  :  |                                                       
 |  __`.    * `. : |   WHY ARE YOU STUFFING THAT SOCK DOWN MY GULLET       
 | /  ""`-. **  \  |   RATHER THAN ANSWERING ME                            
 | \_______`-.___) |                                                       
 `-----------------'                                                       
Krogg                                                                      

#3489: FREE QASSAM ROCKETS

Sun, 2009 Jan 11

israel, topical

                                            ,:                             
                                          ,' |                             
                                         /   :                             
                                      --'   /                              
                                      \/ />/                               
                                      / <//_\                              
                                   __/   /                                 
                                   )'-. /                                  
                                   ./  :\                                  
                                    /.' '                                  
                                  '/'                                      
                                  +                                        
                                 '                                         
                               `.                                          
                           .-"-                                            
                          (    |                                           
                       . .-'  '.     I DON'T SEE WHAT                      
                      ( (.   )8:     THE ISRAELIS ARE COMPLAINING ABOUT    
                  .'    / (_  )                                            
                   _. :(.   )8P  `                                         
               .  (  `-' (  `.   .   AFTER ALL WHOO HOO FREE QASSAM ROCKETS
                .  :  (   .a8a)                                            
               /_`( "a `a. )"'                                             
           (  (/  .  ' )=='                                                
          (   (    )  .8"   +                                              
            (`'8a.( _(   (                                                 
         ..-. `8P    ) `  )  +                                             
       -'   (      -ab:  )                                                 
     '    _  `    (8P"Ya                                                   
   _(    (    )b  -`.  ) +                                                 
  ( 8)  ( _.aP" _a   \( \   *        (SLIGHTLY USED)                       
+  )/    (8P   (88    )  )                                                 
   (a:f   "     `"       `                                                 

#3495: ITCHY RASH

Sat, 2009 Jan 17

israel, topical

         \                                                    
jgs      .\                                                   
      ,=" \   I HAVE A KIND OF ITCHY RASH ON MY LEFT LEG      
   ,="\    \                                                  
       \    \   AND I'M PRETTY SURE THAT ISRAEL IS RESPONSIBLE
        \    )                                                
         \   \                                                
          |   \                                               
           \   \                                              
           `-.  \                                             
              )  \    OH THE HUMANITY ISRAEL HOW COULD YOU    
             (_   \                                           
               `-. \                                          
                  `-`                                         

#3514: BAILOUT

Thu, 2009 Feb 5

bailout, topical

  ,--.                                      
  \  _\_            MY BONER NEEDS A BAILOUT
  _\/_|_\____.'\                            
-(___.--._____(                             
     \   \                                  
      \   \                                 
       `--'                                 
jg                                          

#3515: BONER PART I

Fri, 2009 Feb 6

am i right, bailout, boner*, topical

                       .                                          
                                                                  
                        .                                         
              /^\     .                                           
         /\   "V"                                                 
        /__\   I      O  o                                        
       //..\\  I     .        MORE LIKE MY *BONER* NEEDS A BAILOUT
       \].`[/  I                                                  
       /l\/j\  (]    .  O        AM I RIGHT FOLKS ?!?!?!?!?!?!?   
      /. ~~ ,\/I          .                                       
      \\L__j^\/I       o                                          
       \/--v}  I     o   .                                        
       |    |  I   _________                                      
       |    |  I c(`       ')o                                    
       |    l  I   \.     ,/                                      
     _/j  L l\_!  _//^---^\\_    -Row                             
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~                                    

#3516: BONER PART II

Sat, 2009 Feb 7

am i right, boner*, topical

                       .                                                   
                                                                           
                        .                                                  
              /^\     .                                                    
         /\   "V"                                                          
        /__\   I      O  o                                                 
       //..\\  I     .        MORE LIKE MY *BONER* NEEDS A STIMULUS PACKAGE
       \].`[/  I                                                           
       /l\/j\  (]    .  O        AM I RIGHT FOLKS ?!?!?!?!?!?!?            
      /. ~~ ,\/I          .                                                
      \\L__j^\/I       o                                                   
       \/--v}  I     o   .                                                 
       |    |  I   _________                                               
       |    |  I c(`       ')o                                             
       |    l  I   \.     ,/                                               
     _/j  L l\_!  _//^---^\\_    -Row                                      
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~                                             

#3517: BONER PART III

Sun, 2009 Feb 8

am i right, boner*, tax, topical

                       .                                              
                                                                      
                        .                                             
              /^\     .                                               
         /\   "V"                                                     
        /__\   I      O  o                                            
       //..\\  I     .        MORE LIKE MY *BONER* NEEDS A TAX CUT    
       \].`[/  I                                                      
       /l\/j\  (]    .  O        AM I RIGHT FOLKS ?!?!?!?!?!?!?       
      /. ~~ ,\/I          .                                           
      \\L__j^\/I       o      WAIT I DON'T MUCH LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT
       \/--v}  I     o   .                                            
       |    |  I   _________     (THUS CONCLUDES THE BONER TRILOGY)   
       |    |  I c(`       ')o                                        
       |    l  I   \.     ,/                                          
     _/j  L l\_!  _//^---^\\_    -Row                                 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~                                        

#3530: UMBRELLA

Sat, 2009 Feb 21

rihanna, topical

            ___()___                                          
       _.-'' ,-'`-. ``-._                                     
    ,-'    ,'      `.    `-.     UNDER MY UMBRELLA /          
  ,'     ,'          `.     `.     ELLA /                     
 /      /              \      \      ELLA /                   
/_     /                \     _\       ELSLLFI SDHFKLSDH      
  ``-./_..---'''|``---.._\,-''                                
                |               SLK SKLGH SFHIO WHIO SDFHSKL  
                |               SKL SLKF SKLDF OOF KLKLSKL KL 
                |                                             
                |               SDFLS KLS WRIO AKFLH KDFH K   
                |               JSFKLSK URF LFHSDKLSLHKHL HLSK
                |                                             
                |               FLKSHSHLFS GLK GLHSLHSLH      
             ,  |                                             
             `..' SSt           OW YOU'RE HITTING ME          

#3533: DODECAHEDRUPLETS

Tue, 2009 Feb 24

topical, word

    ,,,        _,_        _@_        _(_        _?_        >*<    
  _/. .\_    _/- -\_    _/, ,\_    _/' '\_    _/a a\_    _/. .\_  
 (.\_o_/.)  (.\_-_/.)  (,\_e_/')  (.\_^_/.)  (.\_~_/')  (.\_c_/.) 
 (.`,.`'.') (.`,.'.'.) (.`'.,'.') ('.,'.`'.) (.'.,'.`.) (.,'.,'',)
  ('.`,'`,)  ('.`,'',)  ('.','.`)  ('.,'.',)  ('.,'.`.)  (',.'`.,)
   ('.`,'`)   ('.','`)   (.'.,'.)   ('.`.,')   ('.','')   (.'.'.')
jgs `--'"`     `--'"`     `--'"`     `--'"'     `--'"'     `--'"' 
                                                                  
                     I HAD DODECAHEDRUPLETS                       
               WHY WON'T ANYONE PAY ATTENTION TO ME               

#3559: A THOUGHTLESS JOKE

Sun, 2009 Mar 22

topical

   _____                                                       
      --| }>/~o)                                               
C,-    -\( \_<_,   DEAR RETARDS,                               
 ) `-/~-/   )  '                                               
[  /\____/\ |      GET OVER IT                                 
 )|        }{                                                  
 ||        |<      YOU'RE LUCKY YOU EVEN GET A SPECIAL OLYMPICS
 ~~        ~~kg                                                

#3565: EARTH HOUR 2009

Sat, 2009 Mar 28

topical

    _------_                                         
  -~        ~-                                       
 -     _      -                                      
-      |>      -   BE SURE TO TURN YOUR LIGHTS OFF   
-      |<      -    FOR A WHOLE HOUR TONIGHT         
 -     |>     -                                      
  -    ||    -                                       
   -   ||   -                                        
    -__||__-                                         
    |______|         AND DON'T FORGET TO CUT YOUR    
    <______>          OWN HEAD OFF WHILE YOU'RE AT IT
    <______>                                         
       \/                                            

#3566: SHAMWOW

Sun, 2009 Mar 29

topical

       ______                                                          
  [===|     |====]                                                     
      |     ||                                                         
      |     ||  I DON'T SEE WHY PEOPLE ARE MAKING SUCH A BIG DEAL      
ejm97 |=====||   ABOUT THE SHAMWOW GUY'S RUN-IN WITH A HOOKER          
      |=====||                                                         
      '"""""'|  I MEAN A HOOKER TRIES TO BITE OFF MY TONGUE            
       |     |   LITERALLY EVERY THIRD WEDNESDAY SO WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL
       '"""""'                                                         

#3601: BEAUTY CONTEST JUDGE

Sun, 2009 May 3

topical

            .$$$$$.          .                                       
  |/()))))  $)'\$==. %%%%%%\%%\                                      
 / ((((==)  ') - $$$'===%%%%\'.|                                     
 |((((( <(   \-_/$$  )" _)%% )/|                                     
 | ())))_/._\._) //_.\_  %% ( /                                      
 | \_) /.--._\___/__.-.\ (.' /    WHAT'S A FAGGOT DOING AS A JUDGE   
  \_ (   __._'_..'.__.   ) .'      IN A FUCKING BEAUTY CONTEST ANYWAY
    \     )  (_.(_)/(     /                                          
     \\  /    \   /  \  //                                           
      )  \     ). \  /  (                                            
     / '  \   /    \|  ' \                                           
    (  |   | / \/   |   )_)                                          
     :-'-- /|  /   /|  /  \                                          
     _\|  / | / .-' | / '. \                                         
   _/  | /  \| (    ( \   '.\                                        
  ( ).'/ |   |  )   |  |   | \                                       
  /.' (_ /   | / )   \'|   |._)    NO OFFENSE TO FAGGOTS             
 .oO  | /    | \/     \|    \ |                                      
      |(     \  )   mrf)\    )_\                                     
_____(__'-.___)/____..'__)___'._'.__                                 

#3602: THE CLOSING OF GEOCITIES

Mon, 2009 May 4

topical

  /\.-./~\                                                                
 (o//o)|  \-._         .-"-.                                              
 .~.'~ |  |    )`-----'     \._     GEOCITIES MUST BE PRESERVED           
(").'/.|  |          (      /-.\     BECAUSE EVERYTHING THERE IS          
 (_/-' \_/    |       \    |   \\     SO INCREDIBLY AWESOME               
        \ /  /   ____.-\  /     ))                                        
        /\| /_.-'      \\ \    ((                                         
       // ||            \\ \    \|                                        
       \\ ||'           // \\        AS IN MOST OF US HAVEN'T HAPPENED    
       (/ ||          _//   \\        ACROSS A GEOCITIES SITE IN YEARS    
       " (_/         (_/   (_/MJP      AND HAD ALREADY ASSUMED IT WAS GONE
         "           "     "                                              

#3603: SWINE FLU

Tue, 2009 May 5

swine flu, topical

        _._._._.,-.                                                  
XXXX&,-'      ( /oo'.XXXXXX                                          
====(   #        _(")=====                                           
 _.-(#       .  /\-._.--.        WITH ALL THIS TALK ABOUT SWINE FLU  
(###.\_(-'--'|_(\#\#####.'        I'M WONDERING IF MY BALLS CAUGHT IT
 `-._###'#_#####.#_'.-''                                             
 kOs '.--' `-.-.-'                                                   

#3635: DAVID CARRADINE

Sat, 2009 Jun 6

topical, word

  /                                
 / ,                               
 \X/                               
  |      DAVID CARRADINE WAS       
  |                                
  |       AUTOEROTIC ASPHYXIAWESOME
  X`                               
 /  \                              
|    \                             
|    |                             
 \__/                              

#3644: IRANIAN REVOLUTION II

Mon, 2009 Jun 15

iran, topical, twitter

    (~)(~)(~)   FINALLY TWITTER HAS FOUND A WAY TO MAKE MONEY !!1!!111!!  
    '|''|''|'                                                             
    \|/\|/\|/   WELCOME TO HTTP://TWITTER.IR/                             
   [~~~~~~~~~]                                                            
    |~~~~~~~|   OKAY NO TWEETING ABOUT THE IRANIAN ELECTIONS OR RIOTS     
ldb |_______|   OR ANYTHING NAUGHTY OR TOPICAL OR ANYTHING AT ALL ACTUALLY

#3650: SOLIDARITY BY ICON

Sun, 2009 Jun 21

facebook, iran, topical

      ______                                                             
     |      |\                                                           
     |      |__\      I'M PRETTY SURE THAT CHANGING MY FACEBOOK          
     |       ---       ICON WILL SHOW MY SOLIDTARITY WITH THE IRANIAN    
     |     /   # \      PEOPLE IN THEIR TIME OF CRISIS                   
     |    |       |                                                      
     |     \     /     SINCE CLEARLY THAT'S HOW ALL REVOLUTIONS STARTED: 
     |       ---|\\     PEOPLE CHANGING THEIR ICONS ON SOCIAL MEDIA SITES
gpyy |__________|  \\                                                    

#3652: PEREZ HILTON VS. WILL.I.AM

Tue, 2009 Jun 23

topical, will.i.am

            __                                                  
           (::\                                                 
     _____ _\::\__       CAN'T WE JUST AGREE THAT BOTH          
   /|    _(::(  \::\__    PEREZ HILTON AND WILL.I.AM            
  / |  _(::\::\  \::\:\    ARE STUPID ATTENTION WHORE FAGGOTS   
  \ |_(::Y\""`.\__\_|""\                                        
   \___\/__\ ___________\    MESSAGE ENDS                       
    ( ( \ x \  __ _  _  _\                  (                   
    |_:__\~  \ \_ |\| `(__\                ) )                  
    |z:   \   \ \ |"\\_7 _)\              ( )                   
    |i:    \   \            \              (,,_________________ 
    |p:     \ # \____________\       _____  ;;_____________):::)
    |p:      \  /  cancers   /      /XxXxX`-'xXxXxXxX`-\        
cjr (o:______ \/____________/      /____________________\       

#3654: ARGENTINA

Thu, 2009 Jun 25

topical

              _____                                          
             ,  ___))                                        
            /  | 6 6                                         
           (___( _e                                          
          ____/ /_       AFK                                 
         / \ o\_/ \                                          
        / /\' _  _)\       GOTTA BANG SOME CHICK IN ARGENTINA
       /_<  )____/\_\                                        
   ___oo'  ,ooooo,|_/                                        
 -//,-(   /      |=/                                         
          |    \  \                                          
           \       \                                         
            )_______\                                        
           /  )   / )                                        
          /  /   (  |                                        
          | /     \ |                                        
_________ |/_______\|________.                               
          =         =                                        
         /(         )\  b'ger                                
        /,/        7 \\_                                     

#3655: NEW KING OF POP

Fri, 2009 Jun 26

michael jackson, topical

                                    o                                     
                                   $""$o                                  
              ALL HAIL PRINCE     $"  $$     THE NEW KING OF POP          
                                   $$$$                                   
                                   o "$o                                  
                                  o"  "$                                  
             oo"$$$"  oo$"$ooo   o$    "$    ooo"$oo  $$$"o               
o o o o    oo"  o"      "o    $$o$"     o o$""  o$      "$  "oo   o o o o 
"$o   ""$$$"   $$         $      "   o   ""    o"         $   "o$$"    o$$
  ""o       o  $          $"       $$$$$       o          $  ooo     o""  
     "o   $$$$o $o       o$        $$$$$"       $o        " $$$$   o"     
      ""o $$$$o  oo o  o$"         $$$$$"        "o o o o"  "$$$  $       
        "" "$"     """""            ""$"            """      """ "        
         "oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo$         
          "$$$$"$$$$" $$$$$$$"$$$$$$ " "$$$$$"$$$$$$"  $$$""$$$$          
           $$$oo$$$$   $$$$$$o$$$$$$o" $$$$$$$$$$$$$$ o$$$$o$$$"          
           $"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""$          
           $"                                                  o          
        BH $"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$"$$           

#3660: SENATOR AL FRANKEN

Wed, 2009 Jul 1

al franken, election 2008, topical

                 __                                               
               .'/\'.                                             
             .'-/__\-'.                                           
           .'--/____\--'.                                         
         .'--./______\.--'.             SOOOOOO                   
       .'--../________\..--'.                                     
     .'--.._/__________\_..--'.            SENATOR AL FRANKEN     
   .'--..__/____________\__..--'.                                 
 .'--..___/______________\___..--'.                               
'========'================'========'                              
      [_|__]            [_|__]                                    
     =[__|_]=====""=====[__|_]==.                                 
      [_|__]     '|     [_|__]  |                                 
      [__|_]     |'     [__|_]  |                                 
      [_|__]  .--JL--.  [_|__]  '===O                             
      [__|_]   \====/   [__|_]                                    
      [_|__]_.-| .; |-._[_|__]                                    
      [__|_]'._ \__/(_.'[__|_]                                    
      [.-._]            [_.-.]                                    
      [_.-.'--..____..--'.-._]                                    
 (o)  [(_.'   .-.     .-.'._)\ (o)                                
(\'/) [  .-. (_.'.-. (_.' .-.](\'/)                               
   ;: [ (_.'.-. (_.' .-. (_.'| ;:'                                
;:    [ .-. '._) .-. '._).-. ]   ;:.                              
      [(_.'  .-. '._) .-.'._)]          THANKS AGAIN MINNESOTA    
  (o) /.-.  (_.'.-.  (_.' .-.];:(o)                               
 (\'/)['._).-. (_.'   .-.(_.'] (\'/)      (WAS: RE: JESSE VENTURA)
      [   (_.'.-.  .-.'._)   \ ;:                                 
;:'   '-._    '._) '._)   _.-'                                    
  LGB      `---..____..---'   ;:`                                 
   ;:'      ;:'.:;     ;;"                                        

#3663: DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT HISTORY

Sat, 2009 Jul 4

topical

    ,__                                                  _, 
 \~\|  ~~---___              ,                          | \ 
  |      / |   ~~~~~~~|~~~~~| ~~---,                  _/,  >
 /~-_--__| |          |     \     / ~\~~/          /~| ||,' 
 |       /  \         |------|   {    / /~)     __-  ',|_\, 
/       |    |~~~~~~~~|      \    \   | | '~\  |_____,|~,-' 
|~~--__ |    |        |____  |~~~~~|--| |__ /_-'     {,~    
|   |  ~~~|~~|        |    ~~\     /  `-' |`~ |~_____{/     
|   |     |  '---------,      \----|   |  |  ,' ~/~\,|`     
',  \     |    |       |~~~~~~~|    \  | ,'~~\  /    |      
 |   \    |    |       |       |     \_-~    /`~___--\      
 ',   \  ,-----|-------+-------'_____/__----~~/      /      
  '_   '\|     |      |~~~|     |    |      _/-,~~-,/       
    \    |     |      |   |_    |    /~~|~~\    \,/         
     ~~~-'     |      |     `~~~\___|   |   |    /          
         '-,_  | _____|          |  /   | ,-'---~\          
             `~'~  \             |  `--,~~~~-~~,  \         
                    \/~\      /~~~`---`         |  \        
                        \    /                   \  |       
                      JB \  |                     '\'       
                          `~'                               
                                                            
    TODAY IS THE DAY THAT THE UNITED STATES FINALLY         
    GAINED ITS INDEPENDENCE AND WON TOTAL VICTORIES         
    OVER GERMANY AND JAPAN AND BECAME A SUPERPOWER          
                                                            
    HAPPY AMERICA'S AWESOME DAY SUCKERS                     

#3675: SOTOMAYOR

Thu, 2009 Jul 16

topical

                                   `,    MORE LIKE SOTOMAYAWN          
                                ___ #                                  
                                |/  ?      AM I RITE FOLKS             
                                | , )\                                 
                                /__/\ \____               #####        
                           ,-   /   \_/    \            _/_ ####       
          /\,_\          |/|   / < _____ _> \          [.[.]-=##       
          )   "\        -|.|--/___/  ,___/___\-         /_    )#       
          \ ___Y.   _____'-'______|\/______________     |__   #        
         __)/      [_______________________________]     \___/         
        /)  \       |                             |     .'\$/\`-.      
       /|| .|       |            _...._           |    ( `.Y.' ( )     
    __;_||__|_______|         ,-' ALT. '-_        |____|:__o___|_|_    
   [________________|        /   ASCII-   \       |________________]   
    |               |       |  _ _ART  ____.      |               |    
    |   Balif       |       | / / \| ||_)| |      |               |    
    |   RALF        |        \\_\_/|_|| \|/       |               |    
____|               |         -_        ,-        |               |____
    |               |           `-...,-'          |               |    
    |               |                             |               |    
MJP |_______________|_____________________________|_______________|    

#3676: WHAT DO WE WANT

Fri, 2009 Jul 17

iran, topical

       _.----._                                     
     .'        '.                                   
    /._   _.--._ \   WHAT DO WE WANT ?????          
    |_ '-' _.._ `|                                  
    \ `---'    `-/   FREEDOM                        
     '._      _.'                                   
jgs     '----'                                      
                                                    
       _.-----._                                    
     .'         '.                                  
    /             \                                 
   ;._     _.---._ ;   WHERE DO WE WANT IT ???????  
   |_ '---' _..._ `|                                
   ; `-...-'     `-;   IRAN                         
    \             /                                 
     '._       _.'                                  
jgs     '-----'                                     
                                                    
       _......._                                    
     .:::::::::::.                                  
    /:::::::::::::\                                 
   ;:::::::::===:::;   WHEN DO WE WANT IT ???????   
   |_`'==='`_,,,_ `|                                
   ;;;-,,,-;;;;;;;-;   NOW                          
    \;;;;;;;;;;;;;/                                 
jgs  ';;;;;;;;;;;'                                  
       `""""""'`                                    
                                                    
                                                    
                                                    
                        WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO     
                        ABOUT IT ??????????         
                                                    
                        CONTINUE CHANTING AS IF THAT
                        EVER ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING  

#3688: THE IMPACT ON JUPITER

Wed, 2009 Jul 29

jupiter, topical

                               ::: =,          THE COSMOS GAVE JUPITER       
                           ;;=;;===             A BLACK EYE BECAUSE IT DIDN'T
              ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=                HAVE DINNER READY ON TIME   
            :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======                                   
           =tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM     *AGAIN*                   
          ;tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                            
          ;tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM                          
          ,=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM                         
      ..   ,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM                        
     ;;..  ,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM                       
   :;;:;=;,...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM                       
  ;.,:,.....         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;                      
  .......             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM                       
;t ...                .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM                       
,=..                    .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM                         
                         .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB                          
        :VMM               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=                            
       ,;VBM                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::                              
       ,,==              WT      `,,,,,,,                                    

#3691: FIST FLU

Sat, 2009 Aug 1

swine flu, topical

 SENATE PAGES CONTRACTING SWINE FLU ????? 
                                          
MAYBE PEOPLE STILL WORRIED ABOUT SWINE FLU
 SHOULD BE MORE CONCERNED ABOUT FIST FLU  
                                          
               _    ,-,    _              
        ,--, /: :\/': :`\/: :\            
       |`;  ' `,'   `.;    `: |           
       |    |     |  '  |     |.          
       | :  |     | pb  |     ||          
       | :. |  :  |  :  |  :  | \         
        \__/: :.. : :.. | :.. |  )        
             `---',\___/,\___/ /'         
                  `==._ .. . /'           
                       `-::-'             
                                          
       CAUSED BY THIS FIST (MINE)         

#3713: A SERIOUS NATIONAL DISCUSSION

Sun, 2009 Aug 23

topical

         .-""""-.                                                        
         |==  ==|-.     I'D LIKE TO HAVE A SERIOUS NATIONAL DISCUSSION   
         |~~ ~~~|`\\    ABOUT HEALTHCARE:                                
         |LILILI| ||                                                     
         |      |//                                                      
         |      |/                                                       
         |      |       GGHLGHLGBHAULGALHGAULLUHGAUHGLABHBHGULBH DIARRHEA
jgs    __|______|__                                                      
      [____________]                                                     

#3714: TEA PARTY

Mon, 2009 Aug 24

topical

      )          I WAS GOING TO GO TO A TEA PARTY BUT THEN I REALIZED
     (           THEY WEREN'T GOING TO BRING ANY TEA FOR US TO DRINK 
      )                                                              
  _.-~(~-.       AND THAT'S JUST DARNED INCONSIDERATE                
 (@\`---'/.                                                          
('  `._.'  `)                                                        
 `-..___..-'                                                         
niki                                                                 

#3717: LIONIZE

Thu, 2009 Aug 27

ted kennedy, topical

             ,  ,, ,                                                   
       , ,; ; ;;  ; ;  ;               LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE
    , ; ';  ;  ;; .-''\ ; ;             LION THE LIONIZE THE LION THE  
 , ;  ;`  ; ,; . / /8b \ ; ;           LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE
 `; ; .;'         ;,\8 |  ;  ;           LION THE LIONIZE THE LION THE 
  ` ;/   / `_      ; ;;    ;  ; ;      LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE
     |/.'  /9)    ;  ; `    ;  ; ;      LION THE LIONIZE THE LION THE  
    ,/'          ; ; ;  ;   ; ; ; ;    LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE
   /_            ;    ;  `    ;  ;       LION THE LIONIZE THE LION THE 
  `?8P"  .      ;  ; ; ; ;     ;  ;;   LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE
  | ;  .:: `     ;; ; ;   `  ;  ;       LION THE LIONIZE THE LION THE  
  `' `--._      ;;  ;;  ; ;   ;   ;    LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE
   `-..__..--''   ; ;    ;;   ; ;   ;    LION THE LIONIZE THE LION THE 
fL             ;    ; ; ;   ;     ;    LIONIZE THE LION THE LIONIZE THE

#3718: ILL OF THE DEAD

Fri, 2009 Aug 28

ted kennedy, topical

    _____                                                            
  /~/~   ~\     PLEASE DO NOT SPEAK ILL OF THE DEAD                  
 | |       \                                                         
 \ \        \                                                        
  \ \        \                                                       
 --\ \       .\''                                                    
--==\ \     ,,i!!i,   AND BY THAT OF COURSE I'M REFERRING TO MY BONER
    ''"'',,}{,,                                                      

#3729: TILA TEQUILA

Tue, 2009 Sep 8

topical

        _.---._                                                  
     .-'       `-.                                               
   .'_____________`.                                             
  /|    .-'!`-.    |\     WELL MAYBE IF MS. TEQUILA WEREN'T SO   
 / |  .'  / \  `.  | \     BORING SHE WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN CHOKED
J  | /   /   \   \ |  L                                          
|  |J   /-----\   L|  |                                          
F  ||  /|     |\  ||  J                                          
|  |J / |     | \ F|  |                                          
J  | <--`-----'--> |  F                                          
 \ |  `.       .'  | /                                           
  \|____`-._.-'____|/                                            
   `.             .'                                             
VK   `-._     _.-'                                               
         """""                                                   

#3730: 2009 AUGUST 9

Wed, 2009 Sep 9

topical

        _____                                                      
     _.'_____`._                                                   
   .'.-'  12 `-.`.      IT'S 9/9/9 !!!!1111                        
  /,' 11      1 `.\                                                
 // 10      /   2 \\                                               
;;         /       ::                                              
|| 9  ----O      3 ||                                              
::                 ;;                                              
 \\ 8           4 //                                               
  \`. 7       5 ,'/                                                
   '.`-.__6__.-'.'      I'M MAKING A BIG DEAL ABOUT THIS           
    ((-._____.-))      BECAUSE I DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND CALENDARS
    _))       ((_                                                  
   '--'SSt    '--'                                                 

#3742: PETER, PAUL AND WHO

Mon, 2009 Sep 21

topical

         ,,,,,                                                   
         \ e e\                                                  
         C  _\/    |\\,    PETER, PAUL AND MARY ???              
          )\_)    \_ /      MORE LIKE OLD, OLD AND OLD           
        _/|/_     _//                                            
      ,'\ ~ /'-,_/  \                                            
     /   \_/    /   /                                            
    ,  |     \_._,-"                                             
   (  <     _'                                                   
   |   \     \                                                   
   ', -',-~.-'                                                   
   _/  )     |                                                   
    |//   |  '                                                   
      '   )  |             NEXT TIME COME UP WITH A CATCHIER NAME
      |   |  |                                                   
   ._.,   -  |.,_ //       LOSERS                                
_\-'  )___|__|_    '-._                                          
b'ger  /____\__\                                                 

#3752: POOR ROMAL POLANSKI

Thu, 2009 Oct 1

roman polanski, topical, woody allen

       _         _                                                        
      / )%.===.%( \                                                       
      | // ,,, \\ |                                                       
      \/ \/6.6\/ \/      .===.      FINALLY WOODY ALLEN WEIGHED IN ON     
      /\ (  _  ) /\     / ,,, \      THE ROMAN POLANSKI ARREST            
      ^^ /()-()\ ^^    ( /6.6\ )                                          
        / /o o\ \      )(  _  )(                                          
       (._\ Y /_.)    (_/;---;\_)                                         
        (O_`&`_O)      / `"*"` \                                          
       /  /   \  \    ( (_.@._) )                                         
      /  ()/^\()  \   /'._\|/_.'\                                         
     /. . . . . . .\ /. . . . . .\     BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY WHEN IT COMES    
     `"`"`|`|`|`"`"` `"`"|"|"|"`"`    TO BEING INAPPROPRIATE WITH         
jgs      _|_|_|_        _|_|_|_      YOUNGER WOMEN HE SURE KNOWS HIS STUFF
        (___|___)      (___|___)                                          

#3770: BALOOON RIDE

Mon, 2009 Oct 19

topical

                       __                                            
                     ,"  ".                                          
  _      .---.    _ /#     \         I TRIED OUT A SIMPLE BALOON RIDE
,' `.  ,'     `.." ".      ,--.      HOAX AND ALL I GOT WAS CHARGED  
|#   `/ #      (#    )    /    )                                     
 `.   |         )   (`.__/    /                                      
   `. \        (     )/'/    /                                       
     `.\       /)   (( /    /                                        
        `.   .'(     )y    /                                         
          >_<\  `._.'(    /                                          
          /   ) /'-`.->,-'                                           
         (   ( (   (                  NO T-SHIRT OR ANYTHING !!!!!!  
          )     )   ) hjw                      THIS SUCKS            
               (                                                     

#3817: BHOPAL

Sat, 2009 Dec 5

topical

  itz  -_                                                                 
       `-;-_   ,--.__                                                     
          `-;-/. ,/\-`.	   BLAH FUCKING BLAH BHOPAL BLAH BLAH FUCKING BLAH
          _//"\\ l'/Y=|                                                   
         /'-?  \\ `;\-|                                                   
       ,'  ;/   \\  \|;                                                   
     ./'  ;'     \\  \(                                                   
   ,-" _;'        \\  `                                                   
,-'_;-"            \                                                      
 "'                                                                       

#3849: 2K10

Wed, 2010 Jan 6

topical

                                                                _ 
 _   _                     _    _             _  _             | |
/|   |\                    |\   |\            /  |\            |_|
 |___|  _   _    _         | \  |  _         /   |  _   _  ,_   _ 
 |   | / | | \  | \  / |   |  \ | /_\ / / |  \___|//_\ / | | ` / \
\|   |/\_|/|_/_/|_/_/\_|  \|   \| \__/\_\_|     /| \__/\_|/|   \_/
     '     |    |     /|        `              ( |                
           |    |     \|                        \|                
                                                 . `:             
                                                : : .             
                                                 : .              
                                                [""]              
                                                |  |              
                                                |  |              
                                                |  |              
                                       :       .'--`.             
                   _..-~-.._         : .:     /`.__.'\            
                 .'         `.      :    .   /        \           
               .'  .-'''''-.  `.   ,-'``'-. ;          ;          
              /  ,'   XII   `.  \  |`-..-'| |   ,--.   |          
             /  /     /|\     \  \ | .   :| |_.','`.`._|          
             | ;       |       ; | | . :  | |--'1997`--|          
             | |IX     o    III| | |`-..-'| ||   | | | |          
             | ;               ; | \::::::/ ||)|/|)|)|\|          
             |  \             /  |  `::::'  |._ ~**~ _.|          
       ------|   `.   V I   ,'   |----)(----|  `-..-'  |-------   
        _____j     `-.....-'     |    )(    |          |,--.      
   ____/ /  /\\ ,-._.--------.-.-' ,-')('-. |          |\`;/      
.-()___  :  |`.!,-'`'/`-._  (___) (  '  `  )`-._    _.-'|;,|      
`-,    \_\__\`,-'>-.,-._           `-....-'     ````    `--'  hjw 
  `-._       (`- `-._`-.`                                         
                           WELL IT'S A NEW YEAR AND I'M           
                          GOING TO WRITE IT AS "2K10"             
                                                                  
                         NOT EVEN SAVING A FUCKING                
                        CHARACTER ANYMORE LIKE A CUNTBALL         

#3860: WHAT'S WORSE

Sun, 2010 Jan 17

gianna michaels, haiti, pornstar, topical

                                                         ,-,               
                                                       ,',' `,             
                                                     ,' , ,','             
                                                   ,' ,'  ,'               
                                                 ,' ,', ,'                 
                                               ,'  , ,,'                   
                                             ,' ,', ,'                     
                                           ,' , , ,'                       
                                       __,',___','                         
                    __,,,,,,,------""""_    __,-"""""_`=--                 
     _..---.____.--'''''''''''_,---'  _; --'  ___,-'___                    
   ,':::::,--.::'''''' ''''''' ___,--'   __,-';    __,-"""                 
  ;:::::,'   |::'' '''' '===)-' __; _,--'    ;---''                        
 |:: @,'    ;:;\ ''''==== =),--'_,-'   ` )) ;                              
 `:::'    _;:/  `._=== ===)_,-,-' `  )  `  ;      I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WORSE
  | ;--.;:::; `    `-._=_)_.-'   `  `  )  /`-._                            
  '        `-:.  `         `    `  ) )  ,'`-.. \  THE EARTHQUAKE IN HAITI  
              `:_ `    `        )    _,'     | :                           
                 `-._    `  _--  _,-'        | :  OR GIANNA MICHAELS'      
                     `----..\  \'            | |  RETIREMENT               
                            _\  \            | :                           
 _____  jrei           _,--'__,-'            : :      _______              
()___ '-------.....__,'_ --'___________ _,--'--\\-''''  _____              
     `-------.....______\\______ _________,--._-'---''''                   
                     `=='                                                  

#3863: MEDICAL FUND

Wed, 2010 Jan 20

aurora jolie, haiti, pornstar, topical

        .----.                                                         
       ===(_)==    FORGET ABOUT HAITI                                  
      // 6  6 \\                                                       
      (    7   )                                                       
       \ '--' /     WHAT ABOUT A MEDICAL FUND FOR AURORA JOLIE'S       
        \_ ._/       NEWLY-ANOUNCED HEART CONDITION                    
       __)  (__                                                        
    /"`/`\`V/`\`\                                                      
   /   \  `Y _/_ \                                                     
  / [DR]\_ |/ / /\                                                     
  |     ( \/ / / /                                                     
   \  \  \      /                                                      
    \  `-/`  _.`                                                       
jgs  `=. `=./      OKAY I KNOW WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION ABOUT PORNSTARS
        `"`                                                            

#3867: WYCLEF JEAN

Sun, 2010 Jan 24

haiti, topical, wyclef jean

       ___                                                       
      /]_/               I'D REALLY LIKE TO HEAR WHAT WYCLEF JEAN
     |\/|.--/'-.          HAS TO SAY ABOUT THE HAITIAN EARTHQUAKE
     \|/:o /  /\    ._,                                          
        \_/_.'0/    _|_                                          
         \____]] (>[___]=]]]===                                  
         /    \___/P{]                                           
      __//    /----\/                                            
     (_[-'\__/_                                                  
         / | | \                                                 
        '=='='=='                                                
       ____||||___                                               
snd   (_""_/ \_""_)                                              

#3903: WOMEN ON SUBS

Mon, 2010 Mar 1

topical

                                                 /                       
                                                ( .                   |\ 
                      .                         | I__        ___---~~~  |
                     .                   _i_---~~~~  \_---~~~        _-\|
                   :;.:                /~      ____--~           __-~    
                   ;:         ___---~~~----~~~~             __--~        
                 : :  __---~~~  _                      __--~             
                : _-~~  ___---~~_O                __--~                  
               .:(_            ~          ___---~~                       
           *.::; ;;~~~------_____-----~~~~         -snafu-               
        ***..;                                                           
     .ojO  *                                                             
  .Ji'`                                                                  
;`'`                                                                     
          THE US NAVY IS GOING TO ALLOW WOMEN TO SERVE ON SUBMARINES     
                                                                         
        I DON'T REALLY THINK I HAVE A JOKE HERE I JUST THINK THAT'S HOT  

#3921: CENSUS 2010

Fri, 2010 Mar 19

census, topical

     .      .                                                     
     |\____/|                                                     
    (\|----|/)                                                    
     \ 0  0 /        HURRAY IT'S TIME FOR THE CENSUS AGAIN !!!111 
      |    |                                                      
   ___/\../\____                                                  
  /     --       \                                                
 /  \         /   \                                               
|    \___/___/(   |     I THINK THIS TIME I'LL BE A MARRIED ASIAN 
\   /|  }{   | \  )     WOMAN WITH FIVE KIDS AND A HANDICAP       
 \  ||__}{__|  |  |                                               
  \  |;;;;;;;\  \ / \_______                                      
   \ /;;;;;;;;| [,,[|======'                                      
     |;;;;;;/ |     /                                             
     ||;;|\   |                                                   
snd  ||;;/|   /         TAKE ***THAT*** UNITED STATES CONSTITUTION
     \_|:||__|                                                    
      \ ;||  /                                                    
      |= || =|                                                    
      |= /\ =|                                                    
      /_/  \_\                                                    

#3946: KYRGYZSTAN

Tue, 2010 Apr 13

topical

            .------------------------------------------------. 
           ( POOR KYRGYZSTAN ........ SO WHERE IS THAT ANYWAY )
          //'------------------------------------------------' 
         /      , _.-~~-.__            __.,----.               
      (';    __( )         ~~~'--..--~~         '.             
(    . \"..-'  ')|                     .       \  '.           
 \\. |\.'                    ;       .  ;       ;   ;          
  \ \'"   /9)                 '       .  ;           ;         
   ; )           )    (        '       .  ;     '    .         
    )    _  __.-'-._   ;       '       . ,     /\    ;         
    '-'"'--'      ; "-. '.    '            _.-(  ".  (         
                  ;    \,)    )--,..----';'    >  ;   .        
                   \   ( |   /           (    /   .   ;        
     ,   ,          )  | ; .(      .    , )  /     \  ;        
,;'-PjP;.';.-.;._,;/;,;)/;.;.);.;,,;,;,,;/;;,),;.,/,;.).,;,    

#3963: PARTHENON

Fri, 2010 Apr 30

topical

               J""--____  __.._                                         
              F i"""--__""     ""-_                                     
             J.'|       """--__    "-_                                  
             +  |_____         """--__"""-_                             
           .' ,' | L J"T"-----____    """--__                           
          +  +|  | L J | J |  LJ  LJ"T----___|                          
         .',' |  | | J | J |  LJ  LJ JJ JJ JJ                           
        +,'|  |  | | J | J J  LJ  LJ JJ JJ ||                           
      .'+| |  |  | | J J J J  L L | L LLJJ JJ                           
   .''.' | |  |  | J J J  L L L L | L LL LL LL                          
   |,' | | |  |  | J J J  L L | L J J L| L| L|                          
   J | | | |  |  | J J J  L L | | J J |J |J |J                          
___J | | | |  |  |  LJ  L L | | | J  LJ LJ LJ L__________________       
   | | | | |  |__|__LJ__L_L_|_|_J-------------"-__                      
   | | |_L---""  .                                ""--_____             
 _-'--""        .                                                       
            hs .                                                        
                                                                        
     WAIT WHAT SOVEREIGN DEFAULT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT                  
                                                                        
      WHAT EVEN IS A "SOVEREIGN DEFAULT"                                
                                                                        
       I'M THE FUCKING PARTHENON WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME ABOUT THIS   
                                                                        
        JESUS CHRIST I'M JUST BARELY STANDING HERE AND YOU'RE EXPECTING 
        ME TO ABSORB THIS SHIT AND OFFER ADVICE ???? WHAT ARE YOU STUPID
                                                                        
         I'M GREEK WE ONLY KNOW HOW TO FUCK SHEEP AND RACK UP DEBT      

#3988: LOST FINALE

Tue, 2010 May 25

battlestar galactica, lost, topical

                             |                                        
                       --====|====--                                  
                             |                                        
                                                                      
                         .-"""""-.     SO WAS STARBUCK IN THE SIDEWAYS
                       .'_________'.    WORLD ALL ALONG OR WHAT       
                      /_/_|__|__|_\_\                                 
                     ;'-._       _.-';                                
,--------------------|    `-. .-'    |--------------------,           
 ``""--..__    ___   ;       '       ;   ___    __..--""``            
  jgs      `"-// \\.._\             /_..// \\-"`                      
              \\_//    '._       _.'    \\_//                         
               `"`        ``---``        `"`                          

#3996: GAZA BOARDING INCIDENT

Wed, 2010 Jun 2

israel, topical

     _________________                                                   
    /            __   \                                                  
    |           (__)  |        WELP JUST GOT A VOICEMAIL ON MY CELL PHONE
    |                 |        THAT WAS FROM A CREDIT CARD PHISHING SCAM 
    | .-----.   .--.  |                                                  
    | |     |  /    \ |                                                  
    | '-----'  \    / |                                                  
    |           |  |  |                                                  
    | LI LI LI  |  |  |                                                  
    | LI LI LI  |  |  |Oo                                                
    | LI LI LI  |  |  |`Oo                                               
    | LI LI LI  |  |  |  Oo                                              
    |           |  |  |   Oo                                             
    | .------. /    \ |   oO                                             
    | |      | \    / |   Oo                                             
    | '------'  '-oO  |   oO                                             
    |          .---Oo |   Oo                                             
    |          ||  ||`Oo  oO                                             
    |          |'--'| | OoO                                              
    |          '----' |        MUST BE THE ZIONAZIS                      
jgs \_________________/                                                  

#4000: THE PAULS

Sun, 2010 Jun 6

ron paul, topical

           )                                                             
        ( (         RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND  
         ) )))       PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL 
        (((((       RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON  
      (  ))))))      PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL
       )((((((      RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND  
      ((,````))      PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL 
       :(.)(.):     RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON  
      (    \\\ )     PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL
          (,\\\\    RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND  
         `.|||||     PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL 
           \   |    RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON  
            ) /      PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL
ejm       /\ /      RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND  
         /  \        PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL 
             /      RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON PAUL RAND PAUL RON  

#4007: WORLD CUP 2010

Sun, 2010 Jun 13

soccer, topical, world cup

           _______                                                            
          | _     |   THERE'S A REASON THAT LITTLE KIDS PLAY SOCCER AS A SPORT
    o     |_o=--  |                                                           
   ()    o            IT'S BECAUSE IT'S SHITTY AND RETARDED AND BORING        
SM |\,                                                                        

#4021: GROWING ON ME

Sun, 2010 Jun 27

soccer, topical, world cup

           _______    I'VE NEVER REALLY GOTTEN INTO SOCCER BUT I'VE BEEN
          | _     |   WATCHING THE WORLD CUP AND I'VE GOT TO ADMIT IT'S 
    o     |_o=--  |   REALLY GROWING ON ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!     
   ()    o                                                              
SM |\,                  ^                                               
                       /|\                                              
                        |                                               
                        |                                               
                        |                                               
                                                                        
                      A PHRASE THAT, SHOULD YOU EVER HEAR,              
                      AUTHORIZES YOU TO SHOOT THE SPEAKER ON SIGHT      

#4025: JUPITER'S BAND

Thu, 2010 Jul 1

jupiter, topical

                               ::: =,    ;                       
                           ;;=;;===      M                       
              ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=                                
            :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======                       
           =tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM                   
          ;tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                
          ;tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM              
          ,=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM             
      ..   ,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM            
     ;;..  ,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM           
   :;;:;=;,...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM           
  ;.,:,.....         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;          
  .......             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM           
;t ...                .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM           
,=..                    .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM             
                         .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB              
        :VMM               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=                
       ,;VBM                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::                  
       ,,==   WWT                `,,,,,,,                        
                                                                 
                    JUPITER'S BAND IS FADING BECAUSE OF MY JIZZ  
                                                                 
                    SORRY TO SAY IT SO BLUNTLY BUT I FIGURE      
                    IT'S BEST IF YOU HEAR IT ME FROM FIRST RATHER
                    THAN FROM KECK OR JODREL BANK OR MAUNA KEA   

#4041: MEL GIBSON II

Sat, 2010 Jul 17

mel gibson, topical

   "=  ="   MEL GIBSON IS JUST MISUNDERSTOOD
   |    |                                   
. _|    |_ .                                
// \\ti// \\                                

#4043: RUSSIAN SPIES

Mon, 2010 Jul 19

topical

            -. .                                     
       _____   ',' ,                                 
     ,'     ,'   ', ',     MY BALLS ARE A RUSSIAN SPY
   ,'     ,'      |  |                               
  \       \       |  |                               
    \ /^\   \    ,' ,'                               
          \   \ ,' ,'                                
    / ~-.___\.-'  ,'                                 
  /   .______.- ~ \                                  
/   /'          \   \      WELL TWO SPIES I GUESS    
\./               \/'                                

#4044: KENNY G. VS. PRINCE

Tue, 2010 Jul 20

topical

     ,-"""""--,-"")    (""-,--"""""-.     KENNY G. VS. PRINCE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    :|        \; '|    |' :/        |:    CAREFULLY FOLLOWING EVERY LITTLE  
    ;| :",_,: : "\|  `-|;" : :,_,": |;    DETAIL OF THIS IMPORTANT STORY    
ctr  |_||   |_|   J    L   |_|   ||_|     !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111 DIARRHEA 

#4046: LEBRON JAMES

Thu, 2010 Jul 22

topical

                             \|       ...                                   
                             -:.     //||\\       _.                        
                               `::::' Q Q ``::::::+.                        
                                     ._"__.'      \                         
                                 ____ `==' _._                              
                               .'             `                             
                             .' .:-      .-.   `                            
                           .' '.')       ' _` /||.                          
                      __.--|_.'  '      : ( \/' /\\                         
                     /,=-U'     '      :   `.  `. /U                        
                               ' '  .  (     -._.---"                       
                     ....-----( ' . `   -.                                  
               )   .:\:::\    '`. `  `  .'   VERY EXCITING !!!!!!! A WHOLE  
           _  (  .:::::::::....--`--..-' \    HOUR SHOW TO FIND OUT WHAT    
          ( ``-.\:::''               \    \    TEAM LEBRON JAMES IS GOING TO
          \\ ""\\-'                   `..:.\    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
           `:-=/)                       `(::)                               
                `                      .:::/                                
a:f_______________________________     |::/   _________                     
                    ______...       .."\\/                                  
 .......------""""""       __..   . \\ -. _   .  NOBODY GIVES A FUCKING SHIT
                   __..--''    .-'   `+ () `-'                              
         __..---"""         ..........|_ `-.   .                            
       ''            ....:::::::::::::.\.'  )   .                           
                      .-' ````::::::''''."""     .                          
                   .-'               .            .                         
                                    .              .                        

#4049: FILMING DAY

Sun, 2010 Jul 25

topical, youtube

     ___ ____   ________                                                   
   ,"_ ,`==='`.'__....__`--.                                               
 ,',' |      ,o@@@@@@@@@@o. \    TODAY'S FILMING DAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
, /___|     d@/@@@@@@@@@@@@b \                                             
||   "|    d@/@@@@@@@@@@@@@@b|                                             
|| ()||   ,@/@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@:                                             
|| , ||   @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@                                             
||(|)||   '@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@//D                                             
|| ' ||    '@@@@@@@@@@@@@@/@P                                              
|| , ||     `@@@@@@@@@@@@/@'|                                              
||(|)|| CCD   `@@@@@@@@@@'  |                                              
|| ' | '----------'"""""_,  |                                              
|| , |`.    S O N Y   |     |    BE SURE TO MAKE VIDEOS OF ALL YOUR FUCKING
:|(|)| |              |     |                                              
`|  '| ::............::     ,    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> DOGSHIT <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
 |\__| ::::::::::::::::----"                                               
 :     '::::::::::::::'                                                    
  \                 ;   Bob_R                                              
   `---------------"                                                       

#4051: DR. DRE 7

Tue, 2010 Jul 27

dr. dre, topical, windows

             _           _                                  
            //\         /\\                                 
           //  \______ /  \\    FINALLY                     
          //   /       \   \\                               
         //   /         \   \\     DR. DRE FINALLY GIVES HIS
        //   /   sSSSs   \   \\    ENDORSEMENT TO WINDOWS 7 
       //_  /   sSSSsSs   \  _\\                            
      //`_\     Ss. . s     /_,\\                           
     //   \`   Ss\ _ /Ss  , /   \\                          
    //   / \ \sSs_) (_sSs/ / \   \\                         
   //   /   \_|_  \ /  _|_/   \   \\                        
   \\  /      sS\ _^_ /ss      \  //                        
    \\/          )   (          \//                         
     `==========================='                          
drx/ejm                                                     

#4120: WYCLEF JEAN'S HAITI PRESIDENTIAL RUN

Mon, 2010 Oct 4

haiti, topical, wyclef jean

    ___ __                                                          
   (_  ( . ) )__                  '.    \   :   /    .'             
     '(___(_____)      __           '.   \  :  /   .'               
                     /. _\            '.  \ : /  .'                 
                .--.|/_/__      -----____   _  _____-----           
_______________''.--o/___  \_______________(_)___________           
       ~        /.'o|_o  '.|  ~                   ~   ~             
  ~            |/    |_|  ~'         ~                              
               '  ~  |_|        ~       ~     ~     ~               
      ~    ~          |_|O  ~                       ~               
             ~     ___|_||_____     ~       ~    ~                  
   ~    ~      .'':. .|_|A:. ..::''.                                
             /:.  .:::|_|.\ .:.  :.:\   ~                           
  ~         :..:. .:. .::..:  .:  ..:.       ~   ~    ~             
             \.: .:  :. .: ..:: .lcf/                               
    ~      ~      ~    ~    ~         ~                             
               ~           ~    ~   ~             ~                 
        ~         ~            ~   ~                 ~              
   ~                  ~    ~ ~                 ~                    
                                                                    
   POOR WYCLEF JEAN                                                 
                                                                    
   HOSPITALIZED FOR "STRESS" AND "FATIGUE"                          
                                                                    
   IT'S REALLY A PITY THAT HE CAN'T RUN FOR PRESIDENT OF HAITI      
   SINCE HE DOESN'T MEET THEIR CONSTITUTIONAL RESIDENCY REQUIREMENTS
                                                                    
   BUT YOU KNOW MAYBE YOU COULD HAVE CHECKED THAT                   
   BEFORE ANNOUNCING HE WAS RUNNING                                 
                                                                    
   HERE'S MY ADVICE, MR. JEAN:                                      
                                                                    
   NEXT TIME YOU WANT TO ANNOUNCE SOMETHING, STEP ONE:              
                                                                    
   OPEN A FUCKING BOOK                                              

#4128: COLUMBUS DAY

Tue, 2010 Oct 12

topical

          ********                                                       
      ****************                                                   
    *******************                                                  
    ********************                                                 
     ********************                                                
        \\   //  ********                                                
         \\\//  *******                                                  
           \\\////                                                       
            |||//                       ,                                
            |||||                    __/                                 
,,,,,,,,,,,//||||\,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,o==o                                 
;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
                                                                         
  IT'S COLUMBUS DAY BUT THE GARDENERS ARE OUTSIDE MOWING THE LAWN ANYWAY 
                                                                         
   WEIRD                                                                 

#4156: QE2

Tue, 2010 Nov 9

topical

     O                                              
    /\_        MORE LIKE QUANTITATIVE ***PLEASING***
   /_  `\D                                          
 ,===/  ||                                          
/___/__ |_\                                         
 (o)    (o) dp                                      

#4225: TUNISIA

Mon, 2011 Jan 17

topical

            ___________                                            
           / |       | |                                           
        ,' ,'         \/',_    __                                  
     ,'__/             |    ',|  "'-,,,,,,,                        
   ,/  _|',            |                |   \                      
   |  |   |',           \               |    \                     
   |__|   |  ',          ',             |     \                    
  /       |     ',        ,_"""""---'-_,'______\                   
 /        |        ',,_-'"    |        |        ',                 
|_________|         |         /        |        / ',,'""""|        
|__  |        ,____/         |        _|       /    |___  /        
'\___|      ,'_,'|_,-,_______|         |       /      , '/         
  \,' _', _/  ,, ,',|        |          \       |   '" ,'          
   \ / |_ ,  |  \||||       ,' |      ,'|    _""    |,'            
    ' ,'  ', |  ||||| __ ,'   _|_ ,'    |    |""---/               
       ' ,"""','"""""" |     /           \"""|    /                
                      |_____|_      __''"    \   |                 
                     |  |  /  """"""   |      \ /                  
                      \ / |            |       /                   
                       \--'            |      /                    
                       |   \__        _|__    |                    
                       |      |__     |   ',,,|                    
                       |         |____|   /   |                    
                       /         _|    ,,'_   |                    
                      |__________|___,'  ,,' /                     
                       \      ---'    \,/  ,'                      
                        \     |    ,,,' \_/    I GUESS MAYBE NOW   
                         |    |_,''      |/   IS NOT THE BEST TIME 
                         |    |       []_|   TO VACATION IN TUNISIA
                          \___'        /                           
                           \       __,'                            
                            \_____/FW                              

#4230: CIVILITY

Sat, 2011 Jan 22

topical

FOLKS I THINK RECENT EVENTS     
REALLY INDICATE THAT WE SHOULD  
INCREASE THE AMOUNT OF CIVILITY 
IN CONTEMPORARY PUBLIC DISCOURSE
                                
         _                      
        /\) _                   
   _   / / (/\                  
  /\) ( Y)  \ \                 
 / /   ""   (Y )                
( Y)  _      ""                 
 ""  (/\       _                
      \ \     /\)               
      (Y )   / /                
       ""   ( Y)                
             ""  Krogg          

#4239: CONSPIRACY DUCK: THE ONION

Mon, 2011 Jan 31

conspiracy duck*, onion, topical

          ..                                                          
       c='o|\ _.-7                                                    
cwz    ,-( | | |/   o< THE MOTHERFUCKING ONION IS RIPPING OFF MY JOKES
  `-.-'  (o)-(o)                                                      

#4260: STROKE ON CAMERA

Mon, 2011 Feb 21

topical

                    o                                                     
           o       /                                                      
            \     /                                                       
             \   /                                                        
              \ /                                                         
+--------------v-------------+                                            
|  __________________      @ |  HA HA, LAUGHING AT THE PRETTY REPORTER    
| /          ,  ooo  \       |  HAVING A STROKE WHILE ON CAMERA           
| |  ---=====|#O#### |  (\)  |                                            
| |          `  \ )  |       |  WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT WASN'T A STROKE  
| |   ,;`,      | |  |  (-)  |  BUT RATHER JUST A "COMPLEX MIGRAINE"      
| |  // o ',    | |  |       |                                            
| \  ' o \ /,   | |  / :|||: |  WELL FUCK THAT THEN IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE
|  -ooo--------------  :|||: |                                            
+----------------------------+  UNF UNF UNF                               
   []                    []                                               

#4271: CHARLIE SHEEN

Fri, 2011 Mar 4

charlie sheen, topical

,-----.      PLEASE CLICK >>> HERE <<< FOR ALL THE LATEST ON CHARLIE SHEEN
\======'.                                                                 
 \  {}   '.                                                               
  \   \/ V '.                                                             
   \  || |   '._                                 _,cmmmnc,_               
    \___68FS___\'-._=----+- _______________,.-=:3H)###C--  `c._           
    :|=--------------`---"'`.   `  `.   `.   `,   `~""==="~`    `'-.___   
  ,dH] '       =(*)=         :       ---==;=--;  .   ;    +-- -_ .-`      
  :HH]_:______________  ____,.........__     _____,.----=-"~ `            
  ;:""'"'----._.------\`  :          .   `.'`'"'"'"P                      
  |:      .-'==-.__)___\. :        .   .'`___L~___(                       
  |:  _.'`       '|   / \.:      .  .-`""`                                
  `'"'            `--'   \:    ._.-'                                      
dew                      }_`============>-                                

#4275: WATSON

Tue, 2011 Mar 8

jeopardy, topical

                  '                                        
         '                 '                               
 '         '      '      '        '                        
    '        \    '    /       '                           
        ' .   .-"```"-.  . '      HERP DERP WHAT IS TORONTO
              \`-._.-`/                                    
   - -  =      \\ | //      =  -  -                        
              ' \\|// '                                    
jgs     . '      \|/     ' .                               
     .         '  `  '         .                           
  .          /    .    \           .                       
           .      .      .                                 

#4282: TUNIS

Tue, 2011 Mar 15

topical

.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .      
.. . . . . . . .#######. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .      
.. . . . . . .#. .#### . . . ####. . .###############. . .      
.. . ########. ##. ##. . . ######################### . . .      
.. . . ##########. . . . ######################. . . . . .      
.. . . .######## . . . .   ################### . . . . . .      
.. . . . ### .   . . . .#####. ##############. # . . . . .      
.. . . . . ##### . . . .#######. ##########. . . . . . . .      
.. . . . . .###### . . . .#### . . . . .## . . . . . . . .      
.. . . . . . ##### . . . .#### # . . . . . ##### . . . . .      
.. . . . . . ### . . . . . ##. . . . . . . . ### .#. . . .      
.. . . . . . ##. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .      
.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . BW/WS
                                                                
   I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL THE MIDDLE EASTERN PROTESTS COME          
   FULL CIRCLE AND THEN THEY JUST START UP AGAIN IN TUNISIA     
   AND THEY DEMAND THAT INDIANA JONES BECOMES THEIR             
   PRESIDENT                                                    
                                                                
   GET IT TUNIS WAS MENTIONED IN RADIERS OF THE LAST ARK        
                                                                
   OKAY FINE                                                    

#4294: MILLISIEVERT

Sun, 2011 Mar 27

topical, tsunami

                     ____ .                                          
                   ###%###%####                                      
                 ######%##%#####    OM NOM NOMMING MANY MILLISIEVERTS
                ########%%#%####                                     
                ##########%%%%%%                                     
                ############%%#%                                     
                ############%%##                                     
                "####_""_""##%#                                      
                  #|L    L###%                %E%E%.                 
                  ##  < ' ,#%#                %E%E%EE%%              
                 ,##\  - ,##%%                %E%E%EE%EE%            
                    /\._.## %__               %E%E%E%EE%%EE          
                _.-'  \  / ##  '-.            %E%E%E%E%%EE%%         
               /    \  \/  ##    |             %E%E%E%EE%EEEE        
               |\    \ /  /##  |/\             %E%EEEE%EEE%%%%       
               | |    /  | ##  |  |           /%EEEE%EE%%EEEEEE      
               | /   |  / %%   /  |          | / %%EEEEEEEEEEE'      
               | |  /  /  ##% |   \          |  .Y                   
               |.|-/\-/-__## /\    \._.--.,-'  /                     
               |/%%%%%/%\%##%| \  _/       | /'                      
               %(%%%%(%%%|##%|  \          |/                        
              |%\%%%%|%%%\#%%|   \      _.-/                         
             /|%%\%%%/%%%%|%/|    '_   ._-/                          
            / |%%%|''|%%%%\  |      "---./                           
           |  |%%%%\ |%%%%%| \                                       
          /   /%%%%| |%%%%%\  |                                      
          |  |%%%%%| |%%%"""' |                                      
          \ |%%%%%%| -''      |                                      
         / \|%%%%%%|   ||     |                                      
        /  /|%%%%%%|   ||      |                                     
   ____/  / |%%%%%%- | || ^    |                                     
 /      ./  |%%-'    | ||      |                                     
--- > _/    |%| | |  | ||      |                                     
    -"       \\ | |  | ||  | | |                                     
               /  |  | |   | | |                                     
               |  |  | |   | | |                                     
               |  |  | |   |/  |                                     
               | /|  \ |   \   |                                     
               |/=|    |       |                                     
               ||=|    |       |                                     
               ||=\    |       |                                     
               ||====  |       |                                     
               ||=====\        |                                     
               |/|==   \       |                                     
                \|     |\       |                                    
                 |     |===.__  |                                    
                 /    | =   .|''                                     
                /=   %  =    |                                       
                ===%%   =    |                                       
               =====    =   |                                        
              ======    =   |                                        
              =====     === |                                        
              =====    ===  |                                        
             =====     ==   |                                        
             ====      =   |                                         
             ====      =   |                                         
             ===       =  |                                          
            ====      =   |                                          
            ===       =  |                                           
           E===       =  |                                           
           EEEE       =  |                                           
           E=EE      == =                                            
           =E="      ====                                            
          EE=E       ====                                            
          EEEE       ====                                            
         =====       ====                                            
         ====        ====                                            
          =          ===                                             
                      "   bonnnie                                    

#4299: APRIL FOOL'S DAY 2011

Fri, 2011 Apr 1

topical

    _\@)_       ___                                                         
     /`\      .' -,'-.__,@                                                  
    /        |     `).-'            WHIPPING MY DICK OUT                    
  _/       _\V^V^V^V/_                                                      
 | /\     .=// ^.^ \\=.                                                     
 /\ /     .'/| ._. |\'.                                                     
/ /-`.       _\___/_                APRIL FOOL'S !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111
 |/\/\   _@->`   _  `<-@._                                                  
   \  \.'  @-'`\( `'-,@   '-.                                               
    \      ,    @    , _.-   `\                                             
     \   .'|    :    |` /'. _.'     LEAVING MY DICK OUT                     
      `"`   \   :    / /`\_|  @                                             
      @_  _.'`""""""`'-\_\.--;`                                             
      `-.`      /,     `, .-'                                               
      _.@--; .-'| '. ;-._;@                                                 
jgs .'     @' _.'.  `@  \                                                   
   |     _.-'`    '-.    \                                                  
    '-._  `-._n_     )   |                                                  
        `'-._ ) `-,.'   /                                                   
             u-'--;`@ .'                                                    
                  |  /                                                      
                 ,\ /,                                                      
                 )\.'/              IGNORING THE APPROACHING SIRENS         
                /   (                                                       
                \_.. '._.@                                                  
                    `-.-'                                                   

#4362: RANDY SAVAGE'S LAST THOUGHTS

Fri, 2011 Jun 3

topical

                ,----------------------.                                
                | SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM |                                
                `-------,--------------'                                
          _____________/__________                                      
        /'            /           `\                                    
       /  ,ssssssssssosssssssssss.  \                                   
      /  dSSSSSSSSSS/|\SSSSSSSSSSSb  \                                  
     /  dSSP'   p   / \   q    `?SSb  \                                 
    /  dSSP    /V\       /V\     ?SSb  \                                
   /  dSSP     /"\       /"\      ?SSb  \                               
  /  dSSSssssssssssssssssssssssssssSSSb  \   HURRRRK GURRRF HEART ATTACK
 /  dSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSb  \   SCREECH CRASH CAR ACCIDENT
/                                          \                            
`-------------------------------------------'                           
pb                                                                      

#4365: PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE

Mon, 2011 Jun 6

election 2012, topical

                  .                                                    
                \ | /                                                  
                _\|/_                                                  
              .' ' ' '.        ___                                     
            _.|.--.--.|.___.--'___`-.                                  
          .'.'||  |  ||`----'"`   ``'`                                 
        .'.'  ||()|()||                                                
.___..-'.'    /       \    I HEREBY ANNOUNCE MY CANDIDACY FOR          
`----'"`     /   .-.   \   THE OFFICE OF PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
            (.'.(___).'.)                                              
             `.__.-.__.'                                               
        jgs   |_|   |_|    OOPS NEVER MIND I TOOK A NICE BIG DUMP      
               `.`-'.'     SO I HEREBY OFFICIALLY WITHDRAW MY CANDIDACY
                 `"`                                                   
                                                                       

#4372: I'D STILL HIT IT

Mon, 2011 Jun 13

duke nukem, topical

DEAR MRS. CONGRESSWOMAN GABRIELLE GIFFORDS,
HELL, I'D STILL HIT IT                     
                                           
SINCERELY, DUKE NUKEM                      
                                           
                       (()))               
                      /|x x|               
                     /\( - )               
             ___.-._/\/                    
            /=`_'-'-'/  !!                 
            |-{-_-_-}     !                
            (-{-_-_-}    !                 
             \{_-_-_}   !                  
              }-_-_-}                      
              {-_|-_}                      
              {-_|_-}                      
              {_-|-_}                      
              {_-|-_}  ZOT                 
          ____%%@ @%%_______               

#4382: JACKASS

Thu, 2011 Jun 23

topical

           .      ..                                         
   __..---/______//-----.        ((  )                       
 .".--.```|    - /.--.  =:    ( VROOM! ))                    
(.: {} :__L______: {} :__; __--( __- -_= )                   
   *--*           *--*                     jnh               
                                                             
  NOW THAT I HAVE THE CONCH I'D LIKE TO PROPOSE SOMETHING    
                                                             
  I SUGGEST AN OFFICIAL DAY OF MOURNING OVER THE UNTIMELY AND
  TRAGIC DEATH OF JACKASS STAR BAM MARGERA                   
                                                             
  OR WHICHEVER ONE OF THOSE FUCKING STUPID TWATS INEVITABLY  
  KILLED HIMSELF (AND SOMEONE ELSE) DUE TO GROSS INCOMPETENCE
                                                             
  FUCK THEM ALL IN THEIR FUCKING STUPID BALL-PUNCHING        
  MANSLAUGHTER-COMMITTING NECKS                              
                                                             
  OKAY WHO WANTS THE CONCH NEXT                              

#4391: THROUGH THE WORMHOLE

Sat, 2011 Jul 2

obama, topical

     ________________________________           
    /                                "-_        
   /      .  |  .                       \       
  /      : \ | / :                       \      
 /        '-___-'                         \     
/_________________________________________ \    
     _______| |________________________--""-L   
    /       F J                              \  
   /       F   J                              L 
  /      :'     ':                            F 
 /        '-___-'                            /  
/_________________________________________--" HS
                                                
   THROUGH THE WORMHOLE WITH THE BLACK DUDE     
   THAT WAS PRESIDENT BEFORE THE ACTUAL         
   BLACK DUDE PRESIDENT BECAME PRESIDENT        
                                                
   IF YOU FOLLOW WHAT I MEAN                    
                                                
   WAIT I'VE GOTTEN MYSELF CONFUSED WHO'S       
   FUCKING UP THESE CUE CARDS                   

#4393: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, USA

Mon, 2011 Jul 4

topical

     __             HAPPY BIRTHDAY USA                      
     ) `"""";._/}                                           
     |       ' /    BE SURE TO GET HOME AT A REASONABLE HOUR
     \        |                                             
jgs   '--. .-.\     DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE                   
          `   `                                             
                    AND DON'T DO ANY FAGGOT SHIT            

#4398: SPACE SHUTTLE ATLANTIS

Sat, 2011 Jul 9

space shuttle, topical

        ^                                                               
      <   >        COUNTDOWN TO THE LAUNCH OF THE SPACE SHUTTLE ATLANTIS
     |     |                                                            
     |     |       THREE                                                
     |     |                                                            
   " |  ^  | "     TWO                                                  
  | || | | || |                                                         
  | || ( ) || |    (EXPLODE)                                            
  |_|| "_" ||_|                                                         
  | ||/"_"\|| |    TWO                                                  
  |_|/ "_" \|_|                                                         
  | /  "_" _\ |                                                         
  |<___"|"___>|                                                         
  | |  ^^^  | |                                                         
  /_\       /_\                                                         
 /|||\ """ /|||\                                                        
/|||||\   /|||||\ JD                                                    

#4411: CARMAGEDDON

Fri, 2011 Jul 22

topical

   _____                                                      
 _/__|_,\__                                         _O        
|,-.___,-. )    _____      _o'   @           __     (`        
( O ) ( O )   _/__|_,\__   /` __( `>    ____|_,\_   |>        
,`-'/_~`-'/) |,-.___,-._) />  )-.)/\-. |,-.___,-.| ,|.        
`===---===-'  `-'   `-'       `-'  `-'  `-'   `-'  `-' Shimrod
                                                              
  OH MY GOD IT'S ***CARMAGEDDON*** !!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111  
                                                              
    WAIT IS IT ALREADY TOO LATE TO MAKE A JOKE ABOUT THIS     

#4415: SPACE SHUTTLE ATLANTIS II

Tue, 2011 Jul 26

space shuttle, topical

          ^                                                            
        <   >                                                          
       |     |       WE WOULD LIKE TO EXTEND OUR HEARTFELT SYMPATHIES  
       |     |       TO THE CREW OF THE SPACE SHUTTLE ATLANTIS         
       |     |       AND OUR HEARTS AND PRAYERS GO OUT TO THE FAMILIES 
     " |  ^  | "     OF ALL THE VICTIMS OF THIS TRAGIC ACCIDENT        
    | || | | || |                                                      
    | || ( ) || |    SPACE EXPLORATION IS NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART   
    |_|| "_" ||_|    BUT RATHER FOR THE BRAVE                          
    | ||/"_"\|| |                                                      
    |_|/ "_" \|_|    WAIT IT LANDED SAFELY ?????                       
    | /  "_" _\ |                                                      
    |<___"|"___>|    NEVER MIND FUCK YOU GUYS THEN WHAT A SHITTY ENDING
    | |  ^^^  | |                                                      
JD  /_\       /_\                                                      
   /|||\ """ /|||\                                                     
  /|||||\   /|||||\                                                    

#4419: PLUTO'S FOURTH MOON

Sat, 2011 Jul 30

pluto, topical

                               ::: =,    ;    TURNS OUT PLUTO HAS
                           ;;=;;===      M    A FOURTH MOON      
              ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=                                
            :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======          WHAT A FAGGOT
           =tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM                   
          ;tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                
          ;tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM              
          ,=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM             
      ..   ,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM            
     ;;..  ,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM           
   :;;:;=;,...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM           
  ;.,:,.....         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;          
  .......             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM           
;t ...                .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM           
,=..                    .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM             
                         .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB              
        :VMM               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=                
       ,;VBM                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::                  
       ,,==                      `,,,,,,,       WT               

#4427: RED FACTION: ARMAGEDDON

Sun, 2011 Aug 7

topical

              _____               
            \"_   _"/             
            |(>)-(<)|             
         ../  " O "  \..          
sjw----""(((:-.,_,.-:)))""--------
                                  
  IT'S OFFICIAL !!!!!!!!111       
                                  
  RED FACTION FRANCHISE DEAD      
                                  
  SEE LIVE AUTOPSY BY PLAYING     
  RED FACTION: ARMAGEDDON         

#4442: MARINE CORPS BALL

Mon, 2011 Aug 22

topical

                          .~""~.,--.                                  |      
                          > :::i_, ~;                                 |      
              mmn        <, ?::j~?`_{}                                |      
              (_)         l_  fl_ f {}                                |      
               \ `.     ,__}--{_/_l___.                               |      
                \  `--~'           `m,_`.                             |      
                 \                      )}                            |      
                  `~----f     i  :-----~'                             |      
                        }     |  |-'/                                 |      
________________________|     !  | f__________________________________!      
                        l        j |                                   \     
                        }==I===I={~(                                    \    
                        f.       1( )                                    \   
                        |      } }` `.                                    \  
                        |     '  { ) )                                     \ 
                        }    f   |(  `\                                     \
                        |    |   |  )  )                                     
                        |    |   |.  ( `.                                    
                        |    |  ,l ) `. )    I'M GOING FOLLOW MARINE SGT     
                       /{    |    \   ( `\    SCOTT MOORE'S LEAD AND ASK     
                      ('|    |\    \ ; `. )    JANE FONDA TO ACCOMPANY ME    
                     (;!|    |`\    \  ',' )    TO THE MARINE CORPS BALL     
                      YX|    |XX\    \XXXXXY                                 
                        !____j_) \__,'> _)        IMAGINE THE HILARITY       
                     ,_.'`--('Y,_' ,^' /`!         THAT WOULD UNSUE          
                 mab L___-__J  L_,'`--'                                      

#4451: HURRICANE IRENE

Wed, 2011 Aug 31

topical

        \    /                                               
         \  /        I BEAT OFF IN MALAYSIA AND              
      .--.().--.      THEN IT TURNS INTO HURRICANE IRENE     
     {\_o(  )o_/}                                            
      {/_/\/\_\}     WAIT I WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY FLAP MY WINGS
       \/    \/       NOT BEAT OFF                           
Dana  ,/      \,                                             
     (/        \)    WELL FUCK THIS SCRIPT I'M AD-LIBBING    

#4487: RAGE RELEASE DATE

Thu, 2011 Oct 6

id software, rage, topical

      _..._                                                 
    ,'     `.                                               
  ,'         `.                                             
,'    _   ,-.  `.                                           
|    (_)  `-'   |    THIS IS THE NEW ID SOFTWARE GAME "RAGE"
|        >      |                                           
|     ,----.    |                                           
|    /,-""-.\   |                                           
`.  |/      "  ,'                                           
  `.         ,'                                             
    `._____,'  Krogg                                        

#4488: STEVE JOBS

Fri, 2011 Oct 7

steve jobs, topical, wikipedia

          .:'                                           
      __ :'__      I DON'T THINK STEVE JOBS' MIDDLE NAME
   .'`__`-'__``.   WAS LITERALLY "FAGGOT"               
  :__________.-'                                        
  :_________:      WHY DO I EVER TRUST WIKIPEDIA        
   :_________`-;                                        
jgs `.__.-.__.'                                         

#4591: WIKIPEDIA BLACKOUT

Wed, 2012 Jan 18

topical, wikipedia

                           .-""""-     WIKIPEDIA BLACKOUT !!!!!!11
                          F   .-'                                 
                         F   J         FOR 24 HOURS THE WORLD     
                        I    I         WILL BE SMARTER            
                         L   `.                                   
                          L    `-._,                              
                           `-.__.-'            ##                 
                                              ###                 
                      #                      ####                 
             _____   ##                 .---#####-...__           
         .--'     `-###          .--..-'    ######     ""`---.... 
_____.----.        ###`.._____ .'          #######                
a:f                ###       /       -.    ####### _.---          
                   ###     .(              #######                
                    #      : `--...        ######                 
                    #       `.     ``.     ######                 
                              :       :.    #####                 
                            .'          )    ###                  
                          .'            /    ##                   
                       _.'              |   .##                   
                     ,:'               |     '                    
                   .'                 <                           
                  '                   |                           
                 /                    |                           
                '                     .                           
                                       `                          

#4595: CRUISE SHIP

Sun, 2012 Jan 22

topical

                   _____|\                                              
              _.--| SSt |:       THIS IS AN EXACT REPLICA OF THE        
             <____|.----||        COSTA CONCORDIA WHICH CRASHED         
                    .---''---,                                          
                     ;..__..'    _...                                   
                   ,'/  ;|/..--''    \                                  
                 ,'_/.-/':            :                                 
            _..-'''/  /  |  \    \   _|/|                               
           \      /-./_ \;   \    \,;'   \                              
           ,\    / \:  `:\    \   //    `:`.                            
         ,'  \  /-._;   | :    : ::    ,.   .                           
       ,'     ::   /`-._| |    | || ' :  `.`.)                          
    _,'       |;._:: |  | |    | `|   :    `'                           
  ,'   `.     /   |`-:_ ; |    |  |  : \                                
  `--.   )   /|-._:    :          |   \ \    NOW YOU CAN SEE WHY        
     /  /   :_|   ;`-._;   __..--';    : :   THIS TRAGEDY WAS INEVITABLE
    /  (    ;|;-./_  _/.-:'o |   /     ' |                              
   /  , \._/_/_./--''/_|:|___|_,'        |                              
  :  /   `'-'--'----'---------'          |                              
  | :     O ._O   O_. O ._O   O_.      ; ;                              
  : `.      //    //    //    //     ,' /                               
~~~`.______//____//____//____//_______,'~                               
          //    //~   //    //                                          
   ~~   _//   _//   _// ~ _//     ~                                     
 ~     / /   / /   / /   / /  ~      ~~                                 
      ~~~   ~~~   ~~~   ~~~                                             

#4610: SUPER WORLD SERIES XLVI

Mon, 2012 Feb 6

football, topical

                 __                                      
              .-'||'-.                                   
            .'   ||   '.     YAY THE TOPEKA RED WINGS WIN
           /   __||__   \    THE SUPER WORLD SERIES      
           | /`-    -`\ |                                
           | | 6    6 | |                                
           \/\____7___/\/                                
   .--------:\:I:II:I:/;--------.                        
  /          \`:I::I:`/          \                       
 |            `------'            |                      
 |             \____/             |                      
 |      ,    __     ___    ,      |                      
 |======|   /  |   / _ \   |======|                      
 |======|   ^| |  | | | |  |======|                      
 |~~~~~|     | |  | |_| |   |~~~~~|                      
 |     |\   [___]  \___/   /|     |                      
  \    \|                  |/    /                       
  `\    \  _ _.-=""=-._ _  /    /'                       
    `\   '`_)\\-++++-//(_`'   /'                         
jgs   ;   (__||      ||__)   ;                           
       ;   ___\      /___   ;                            
        '. ---/-=..=-\--- .'                             
          `""`        `""`                               

#4642: KONY 2012

Fri, 2012 Mar 9

joseph kony, topical

            ___________                                                    
           / |       | |                                                   
        ,' ,'         \/',_    __                                          
     ,'__/             |    ',|  "'-,,,,,,,                                
   ,/  _|',            |                |   \                              
   |  |   |',           \               |    \                             
   |__|   |  ',          ',             |     \                            
  /       |     ',        ,_"""""---'-_,'______\                           
 /        |        ',,_-'"    |        |        ',                         
|_________|         |         /        |        / ',,'""""|                
|__  |        ,____/         |        _|       /    |___  /                
'\___|      ,'_,'|_,-,_______|         |       /      , '/                 
  \,' _', _/  ,, ,',|        |          \       |   '" ,'                  
   \ / |_ ,  |  \||||       ,' |      ,'|    _""    |,'                    
    ' ,'  ', |  ||||| __ ,'   _|_ ,'    |    |""---/                       
       ' ,"""','"""""" |     /           \"""|    /                        
                      |_____|_      __''"    \   |                         
                     |  |  /  """"""   |      \ /                          
                      \ / |            |       /                           
                       \--'            |      /                            
                       |   \__        _|__    |                            
                       |      |__     |   ',,,|   BOY THESE BRACELETS AND  
                       |         |____|   /   |   PINS AND BUMPER STICKERS 
                       /         _|    ,,'_   |   AND BROCHURES SURE DO    
                      |__________|___,'  ,,' /    BUY A LOT OF SENSEO BRAND
                       \      ---'    \,/  ,'     COFFEE PODS AND INDIE CDS
                        \     |    ,,,' \_/                                
                         |    |_,''      |/                                
                         |    |       []_|                                 
                          \___'        /                                   
                           \       __,'                                    
                            \_____/      FW                                

#4672: HANGIN' WITH JESUS: PART FIVE

Sun, 2012 Apr 8

hangin with jesus*, topical

                    .-=====-.                                        
                    | .""". |                                        
                    | |   | |                                        
                    | |   | |                                        
                    | '---' |                                        
                    |       |                                        
                    |       |                                        
 .-================-'       '-================-.                     
j|  _                                          |                     
g|.'o\                                    __   |                     
s| '-.'.                                .'o.`  |                     
 '-==='.'.=========-.       .-========.'.-'===-'                     
        '.`'._    .===,     |     _.-' /                             
          '._ '-./  ,//\   _| _.-'  _.'                              
             '-.| ,//'  \-'  `   .-'                                 
                `//'_`--;    ;.-'                                    
                  `\._ ;|    |                                       
                     \`-'  . |                                       
                     |_.-'-._|                                       
                     \  _'_  /  TIME TO LET ME DOWN FOR EASTER       
                     |; -:- |   SO I CAN PUT SOME COOKIES IN MY OVEN 
                     || -.- \                                        
                     |;     .\  SINCE I'M JEWISH IT'S TECHNICALLY    
                     / `'\'`\-; A "JEW OVEN"                         
                    ;`   '. `_/                                      
                    |,`-._;  .; ALRIGHT QUIT MAKING STUPID JOKES AND 
                    `;\  `.-'-; UNNAIL ME, I'M DYING FOR A SHOWER TOO
                     | \   \  |                                      
                     |  `\  \ |                                      
                     |   )  | |                                      
                     |  /  /` /                                      
                     | |  /|  |                                      
                     | | / | /                                       
                     | / |/ /|                                       
                     | \ / / |                                       
                     |  /o | |                                       
                     |  |_/  |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     |       |                                       
                     '-=====-'                                       

#4695: MAY DAY

Tue, 2012 May 1

communism, topical

       /,,                                                
      /\  )                                               
        \,'                                               
     /`'`\                                                
                                                          
          ,              HAPPY COMMIE DAY !!!!!!!!        
         ,@,                                              
        ,@@@,            USEFUL IDIOTS SLAUGHTERED:       
       ,@@@@@,            ONE HUNDRED MILLION AND COUNTING
`@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@`                                     
  `@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@`                                       
DR  `@@@@@@@@@@@`                                         
   ,@@@@@@`@@@@@@,                                        
   @@@@`     `@@@@                                        
  ;@`           `@;                                       
    _   _   _   _                                         
   (   (   (   |_)                                        
    ~   ~   ~  |                                          

#4706: OGRE

Sat, 2012 May 12

topical

         __,='`````'=/__                                            
        '//  (o) \(o) \ `'         _,-,                             
        //|     ,_)   (`\      ,-'`_,-\                             
      ,-~~~\  `'==='  /-,      \==```` \__                          
     /        `----'     `\     \       \/                          
  ,-`                  ,   \  ,.-\       \                          
 /      ,               \,-`\`_,-`\_,..--'\                         
,`    ,/,              ,>,   )     \--`````\                        
(      `\`---'`  `-,-'`_,<   \      \_,.--'`                        
 `.      `--. _,-'`_,-`  |    \                                     
  [`-.___   <`_,-'`------(    /                                     
  (`` _,-\   \ --`````````|--`                                      
   >-`_,-`\,-` ,          |                                         
 <`_,'     ,  /\          /     $905,186 SURE BUYS A LOT OF BIG DICE
  `  \/\,-/ `/  \/`\_/V\_/                                          
     (  ._. )    ( .__. )                                           
     |      |    |      |                                           
      \,---_|    |_---./                                            
Zeus  ooOO(_)    (_)OOoo                                            

#4736: RAY BRADBURY'S TRANSIT

Mon, 2012 Jun 11

topical

     .,                                          
     O~.~                                        
    (/\~~     DID YOU HEAR THAT RAY BRADBURY DIED
     )J       WHILE ATTEMPTING TO TRANSIT THE SUN
   _.|)._                                        
.-'. ;) .`-.                                     
\.\ ' `  './                                     
  '--..--'                                       
            kOs                                  

#4759: MASS EFFECT: EXTENDED CUT

Wed, 2012 Jul 4

mass effect, topical

                                 _.,_                                        
                              ,-'.' .`-,                                     
                             ;; '. ' `. ;` - _      I DOWNLOADED AND PLAYED  
                          _,-; ' ; `.  ,% .-,  -    MASS EFFECT: EXTENDED CUT
                   ,_.,-'`   ';; ; : ;%'  | |   \   SO I COULD BE MAD        
       ___  _._,-`'\            `'-`'  _.,' `.   )  ALL OVER AGAIN           
 __,--`-,,`'  ,._,.-`-., _.,-.--.-,`''`  |  _|   |__                         
  `---'////\ /  .-,     `-`-^--`'^`-...,,| | |.,/                            
       //\)(/   `-\.-.                   | `-'                               
                  ( .-;                  |   |    ,.                         
                   `-~ ~~-.              `._.'  ,/ /                         
                     `~ ~~~ ~~                 /,.`)                         
                                              //  /                          
                                             /_ `/                           
                                            (  `/                            
                                             `-'                             
mic                                                                          

#4760: LOST TOOLBAGS

Thu, 2012 Jul 5

nasa, topical

 ________________________                                              
|                        |                                             
|            o   o  o    |                                             
|          o= o. ..      |   OH SHIT THEY'RE ABOUT TO PUT A WOMAN IN   
|           . : . \\.    |   COMMAND OF THE INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION
|          o  . o . . oo |                                             
|          o-.\//. :o.   |                                             
|    ,,,    o'\o. o . =o |                                             
|   "o0".  o .=o\_//o o  |                                             
|   ' -,"       \ /    o |                                             
|   ,` -.       | |      |                                             
|/\/|    \\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\|                                             
|  /    , `-, {\/}  \    |                                             
|  '-,   \,-' /0o\-_/;   |                                             
|    /   \  \ \''/::::   |   THIS IS GOING TO MEAN A LOT MORE          
|   '"|^\"`  '-==::::;   |   LOST TOOLBAGS IN LOW EARTH ORBIT          
|     d d       ||  || Na|                                             
 """"""""""""""""""""""""                                              

#4779: DARK NIGHT RISES SHOOTING

Tue, 2012 Jul 24

topical

..______....__________,____,,,.                                          
`'------- ';;-..-----.-.       |   OH MY GOD GUNS ARE BAD BLAH BLAH BLAH 
     ;     ;; ;;     '-''-.__,'    SAME SHIT RECYCLED OVER AND OVER AGAIN
     ',   ,;' '                                                          
  CB   ''''                                                              

#4804: MATH OR MATHS

Sat, 2012 Aug 18

topical, twitter

        _          _          _          _                          
       //|\       //|\       //|\       //|\                        
       c_"/       c_"/       c_"/       c_"/                        
      __/\__       /\__       /\         /\                         
       /  \       /\ \       /\/\       /\/\                        
      /____\     /____\     /____\     /____\                       
S-v     /l         ll         l\         ll                         
                                                                    
   LET'S HAVE AN APPARENTLY SERIOUS CHILDISH SLAPFIGHT ON TWITTER   
   ABOUT WHETHER IT SHOULD BE WRITTEN "MATH" OR "MATHS" (APPARENTLY 
   COMPLETELY IGNORANT OF THE CONVENTIONS BETWEEN COUNTRIES AND     
   HOW UTTERLY FUCKING BORING THIS TOPIC IS)                        
                                                                    
   MEANWHILE LET'S STILL PRETEND LIKE WE'RE ACTUALLY SERIOUS PEOPLE 
   WRITING SERIOUS BOOKS ABOUT SERIOUS TOPICS ON PHYSICS AND SCIENCE
   WHILE BEING TOO STUPID TO ACTUALLY NOT REALIZE THIS IS POINTLESS 
                                                                    
   NEXT UP: ALUMINUM OR ALUMINIUM !?!?!?!?? TWITTERFIGHT !!!!!1!!11!

#4806: CURIOSITY

Mon, 2012 Aug 20

nasa, topical

                .                                            .              
     *   .                  .              .        .   *          .        
  .         .                     .       .           .      .        .     
        o                             .                   .                 
         .              .                  .           .                    
          0     .                                                           
                 .          .                 ,                ,    ,       
 .          \          .                         .                          
      .      \   ,                                                          
   .          o     .                 .                   .            .    
     .         \                 ,             .                .           
               #\##\#      .                              .        .        
             #  #O##\###                .                        .          
   .        #*#  #\##\###                       .                     ,     
        .   ##*#  #\##\##               .                     .             
      .      ##*#  #o##\#         .                             ,       .   
          .     *#  #\#     .                    .             .          , 
                      \          .                         .                
____^/\___^--____/\____O______________/\/\---/\___________---______________ 
   /\^   ^  ^    ^                  ^^ ^  '\ ^          ^       ---         
         --           -            --  -      -         ---  __       ^     
   --  __                      ___--  ^  ^                         --  __ RC
                                                                            
    FOLKS WE JUST LANDED A PROBE ON MARS !!!!!! ISN'T THAT EXCITING ?!?!?!  
                                                                            
    I GUESS IT WOULD BE IF WE HADN'T DONE IT AT LEAST FIVE TIMES BEFORE     
                                                                            
    BUT IT'S A ***DIFFERENT*** PROBE AND WE DID IT ***DIFFERENTLY*** !!!11  
                                                                            
                                                                            
    DIARRHEA                                                                

#4875: THE SPACE BALLOON

Sun, 2012 Oct 28

topical

    ,-""""-.                                                           
  ,'      _ `.    FOLKS OUR SOCIETY IS SO SERIOUS ABOUT EXPLORING SPACE
 /       )_)  \   THAT I JUMPED OUT OF A FUCKING BALLOON               
:              :                                                       
\              /  YEAH THAT'S RIGHT YOU HEARD ME: A FUCKING BALLOON    
 \            /                                                        
  `.        ,'                                                         
    `.    ,'         I SET A WORLD RECORD: MOST DEPRESSING VAGUELY     
      `.,'           SPACE-RELATED EVENT GIVEN THE FACT THAT WE'VE     
  hjw  /\`.   ,-._   ALREADY LANDED ON THE FUCKING MOON                
           `-'                                                         

#4885: FOUR MORE YEARS

Wed, 2012 Nov 7

election 2012, topical

                                                                    
 ,-'"-,    MORE LIKE FOUR MORE *EARS*                               
   ('; ;                                                            
   .) ,    GET IT                                                   
 .   ;                                                              
  '-'      I DIDN'T GET THE MEMO IS IT OKAY TO MAKE FUN OF OBAMA YET
                                                                    
Phil                                                                

#4886: HURRICANE SANDY

Thu, 2012 Nov 8

topical

 m   " m" " m  m                                                            
   " m " "m   " " "m m m                                                    
 "  m  " "  " "m" " " "m m                                                  
m  m m "  " " " " "m"m"m"m"m"m                                              
  " m " " "m"m" "m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m      I HOPE THOSE NEW YORKERS DON'T MESS UP
"m"m m"m" "m m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m$"m    THE SUPERDOME AGAIN AFTER SANDY      
     $  " "m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m"m$"  $m                                        
     "          "m"m"m"m"m"m$"  m"m"m                                       
     $           $"m"m"m"m$"  m"m"  "m                                      
    m"m          m  "m"m$"  m"m"     "m                                     
    $ $          $    $"  m"m"        "m                                    
     "           m    "$m"m"          m"m                                   
                m"m     $"          m"  $                                   
                $ $      $        m"  m"                                    
                "m"       $     m"  m$$                                     
                           $  m"  m$"  $                                    
                            $"  m""$    $                                   
                             """    $    $                                  
                                     $    $                                 
                                      $    $                                
                                       $    $                               

#4896: THANKSGIVING

Sun, 2012 Nov 18

topical

   .-"""""""-.                                                                 
  {      _____}---. .-.    I HOPE WE'RE ALL LOOKING FORWARD TO THANKSGIVING !!!
 {      /          (  o\                                                       
{      /            \ \V     THAT'S THE TIME OF THE YEAR WHEN WE GIVE THANKS   
{     |             _\ \.    TO OUR LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST FOR NOT BEING 
 {    |            / '-' \   JEWISH AND SO WE CAN TOTALLY EAT TURKEY           
  {___\   /\______/    __/                                                     
       ~~/   /    /____//    JUST ONE MORE AWESOME THING THAT JEWISH FOLKS ARE 
         '--'\___/ \___/     PROSCRIBED FROM PARTAKING IN                      
                 '\_ \_                                                        
     _Dana'97_    /\ /\    CHRISTIANITY RULES !!!!11111111111111111111111111111

#5020: DONGLES

Fri, 2013 Mar 22

dickwolves, topical

                                               
 /^\      /^\                                  
 |  \    /  |                                  
 ||\ \../ /||    DONGLES ARE THE NEW DICKWOLVES
 )'        `(                                  
,;`w,    ,w';,                                 
;,  ) __ (  ,;                                 
 ;  \(\/)/  ;;                                 
;|  |vwwv|    ``-...                           
 ;  `lwwl'   ;      ```''-.                    
;| ; `""' ; ;              `.                  
 ;         ,   ,          , |                  
 '  ;      ;   l    .     | |                  
 ;    ,  ,    |,-,._|      \;                  
  ;  ; `' ;   '    \ `\     \;                 
  |  |    |  |     |   |    |;                 
  |  ;    ;  |      \   \   (;                 
  | |      | l       | | \  |                  
  | |      | |  pb   | |  ) |                  
  | |      | ;       | |  | |                  
  ; ,      : ,      ,_.'  | |                  
 :__'      | |           ,_.'                  
          `--'                                 

#5021: MICHIO KAKU

Sat, 2013 Mar 23

topical

  .  _    .-..                                                          
 ( `' ;  .( ; ;                                                         
.-`()'.;(_.{}:'                                                         
`..'`,' / ' ;.)                                                         
  `-'\ /  `-'     NEWSFLASH: MICHIO KAKU STILL A FLOWERY BULLSHIT ARTIST
      X                                                                 
     _U_                                                                
     \ /                                                                
     | |                                                                
     | |                                                                
    /   \                                                               
   |    ;|                                                              
   |    ;|                                                              
   |   ;;|                                                              
   |..;;;|                                                              
   |;;;;;|   ko1                                                        
   `;;;;;'                                                              
     `"'                                                                

#5119: NFL

Sat, 2013 Jun 29

topical

                 __                                                
              .-'||'-.                                             
            .'   ||   '.                                           
           /   __||__   \                                          
           | /`-    -`\ |                                          
           | | 6    6 | |   WELP I MADE IT TO THE NFL !!!!!        
           \/\____7___/\/                                          
   .--------:\:I:II:I:/;--------.     TIME TO FUCKING MURDER PEOPLE
  /          \`:I::I:`/          \                                 
 |            `------'            |                                
 |             \____/             |                                
 |      ,     __   _____   ,      |                                
 |======|    / /  /  _  \  |======|                                
 |======|   / /__ \ <_> /  |======|                                
 |~~~~~|   | <_> \/ <_> \   |~~~~~|                                
 |     |\   \____/\_____/  /|     |                                
  \    \|                  |/    /                                 
  `\    \  _ _.-=""=-._ _  /    /'                                 
    `\   '`_)\\-++++-//(_`'   /'                                   
jgs   ;   (__||      ||__)   ;                                     
       ;   ___\      /___   ;                                      
        '. ---/-=..=-\--- .'                                       
          `""`        `""`                                         

#5120: SUPREME COURT RULING

Sun, 2013 Jun 30

topical

         ,)                                                     
     ,`/ |\    FINALLY TAP DANCERS CAN MARRY WITHOUT HARRASSMENT
     /  `/ |                                                    
   (,_,/  /                                                     
    `___, \                                                     
         \ \                                                    
        / , \                                                   
       /,  \ \                                                  
       \`   `.`.                                                
        \ \   \,`,                                              
ejm    -`-'    -'                                               
                                                                
            (,                                                  
       ,`/  /|                                                  
       /L',/ |                                                  
   ,)_,,\', /                                                   
    `___,V |                                                    
         \ ,                                                    
        / , \                                                   
       /,  \ \                                                  
       \`   `.`.                                                
        \ \   \,`,                                              
ejm    -`-'    -'                                               
                                                                
            (,                                                  
       ,`/  /|                                                  
       /L',/ |                                                  
   ,)_,,\', /                                                   
    `___,V |                                                    
         \ ,                                                    
        /   \                                                   
       /, | |                                                   
       |` | \                                                   
       | \| |                                                   
ejm   -`-'|_|                                                   
           V                                                    
                                                                
            ,)                                                  
    (, ,`/  /|                                                  
     |\/L',/ |                                                  
     \ ,\', /                                                   
      ` ,V |                                                    
         \ ,                                                    
         /  \                                                   
        /, ` \                                                  
        |`  '|                                                  
        | \/ |                                                  
ejm     _,--._                                                  
                                                                
                                                                
       ,`/                                                      
       /L',_                                                    
       ,\',` \                                                  
      ` ,V ||/                                                  
        )\ ,(                                                   
         /  \                                                   
        /, ` \                                                  
        |`  ` \                                                 
        | \  | \                                                
ejm     _,-   -._                                               
                                                                
       ,`/                                                      
       /L',_                                                    
  _    ,\',` \                                                  
  `;--` ,V ||/                                                  
    `--' \ ,(                                                   
         /  \                                                   
        /, ` \                                                  
       /'   '|                                                  
      / |  / |                                                  
ejm  `-.   -._                                                  

#5155: HELLO NSA

Sun, 2013 Aug 4

topical

              _              _                                                
             | |------------| |                                               
          .-'| |            | |`-.                                            
        .'   | |            | |   `.            HELLO NSA !!!!!!!!!111111     
     .-'      \ \          / /      `-.                                       
   .'        _.| |--------| |._        `.       HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH GET IT BECAUSE
  /    -.  .'  | |        | |  `.  .-    \                                    
 /       `(    | |________| |    )'       \     HAHAHAHAHAHAHA STILL LAUGHING 
|          \  .i------------i.  /          |    AT MY NSA JOKE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA 
|        .-')/                \(`-.        |                                  
\    _.-'.-'/     ________     \`-.`-._    /    IT'S FRESH AND TOPICAL AND    
 \.-'_.-'  /   .-' ______ `-.   \  `-._`-./\    ONLY ALREADY BEEN MADE THREE  
  `-'     /  .' .-' _   _`-. `.  \     `-' \\   MILLION TIMES HAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
         | .' .' _ (3) (2) _`. `. |        //                                 
        / /  /  (4)  ___  (1)_\  \ \       \\   HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
        | | |  _   ,'   `.==' `| | |       //                                 
        | | | (5)  | B.T.| (O) | | |      //    STOMP ON MY NECK UNTIL THERE  
        | | |   _  `.___.' _   | | |      \\    ARE NO FURTHER SIGNS OF LIFE  
        | \  \ (6)  _   _ (9) /  / |      //                                  
        /  `. `.   (7) (8)  .' .'  \      \\                                  
       /     `. `-.______.-' .'     \     //                                  
      /        `-.________.-'        \ __//                                   
     |                                |--'                                    
     |================================|hjw                                    
     "--------------------------------"                                       

#5196: THE LESSON OF THE PENNY ARCADE FIASCO

Sat, 2013 Sep 14

dickwolves, penny arcade, topical

                 DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT
 ,---'.                                   
 C.^o^|          DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT
 (_,-_)                                   
,--`|-.          DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT
|\    ]\__n_                              
||`   '---E/     DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT
  Ojo98                                   
                 DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT

#5208: TWIX COMMERCIAL

Thu, 2013 Sep 26

topical

    o   oo                                                           
o         o   o                                                      
   ___o o   o          I REALLY APPRECIATE THE DEPTH AND INTELLIGENCE
  /`._;o       o        OF THIS LATEST TWIX COMMERCIAL               
 |   /   o                                                           
 ;_  |                                                               
   `-'              jg                                               

#5213: GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN

Tue, 2013 Oct 1

shutdown, topical

 __,   __, .  , ___, .  ,  ___,                                         
/  __,/_,  |\/|  |   |\ | ' |                                           
\__/  \__  |  | _|_, | \|  _|_                                          
         ` '  `'     '   `'   `                                         
         ___     ___                                                    
       .d9969b d6966b.                                                  
       d66b'e( )a`d99b    THIS GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN                      
       `d9p _/ \_ q6b'     BROUGHT TO YOU                               
       __/ (__ __) \__ _    BY THESE TWO HOT TWINS                      
      /  \_/  /  \_/  {_)                                               
     /       /         \      WHOEVER SAID ASTROLOGY WASN'T USEFUL ??///
     \  \__ / /\     _\ \                                               
      \____j`-. ).--|___/  hjw                                          
            `-' '--'                                                    

#5225: REASON FOR NON-PARTICIPATION

Sun, 2013 Oct 13

shutdown, topical

         _..._ ___                                               
       .:::::::.  `"-._.-''.                                     
  ,   /:::::::::\     ':    \                     _._            
  \:-::::::::::::\     :.    |     /|.-'         /:::\           
   \::::::::\:::::|    ':     |   |  /           |:::|           
    `:::::::|:::::\     ':    |   `\ |    __     |\::/\          
      `-:::-|::::::|    ':    |  .`\ .\_.'  `.__/      |         
            |::::::\    ':.   |   \ ';:: /.-._   ,    /          
            |:::::::|    :.   /   ,`\;:: \'./0)  |_.-/           
            ;:::::::|    ':  |    \.`;::.   ``   |  |            
             \::::::/    :'  /     _\::::'      /  /             
              \::::|   :'   /    ,=:;::/           |             
               \:::|   :'  |    (='` //        /   |             
                \::\   `:  /     '--' |       /\   |             
                 \:::.  `:_|.-"""-.    \__.-'/::\  |             
                  '::::.:::...:::. '.       /:::|  |             
                   '::/::::::::::::. '-.__.:::::|  |             
                     |::::::::::::\::..../::::::| /              
                     |:::::::::::::|::::/::::::://               
                     \:::::::::::::|'::/::::::::/                
                     /\::::::::::::/  /:::::::/:|                
                    |::';:::::::::/   |::::::/::;                
                    |:::/`-:::::;;-._ |:::::/::/                 
                    |:::|  `-::::\   `|::::/::/                  
                jgs |:::|     \:::\   \:::/::/                   
                   /:::/       \:::\   \:/\:/                    
                  (_::/         \:::;__ \\_\\___                 
                  (_:/           \::):):)\:::):):)               
                   `"             `""""`  `""""""`               
BECAUSE OF THE GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN I'VE STOPPED GETTING ERECTIONS

#5259: PS4

Sat, 2013 Nov 16

playstation, topical

     ________________    PS4 !!!!!!!!111 PS4 !!!!!!111 PS4 !!!!!!1111    
SgH |   |,"    `.|   |                                                   
    |   /  SONY  \   |   MAYBE NOW THAT I BOUGHT ONE SOMEONE WILL LOVE ME
    |   |        |   |                                                   
    |O _\   />   /_  |   ___ _                                           
    |_(_)'.____.'(_)_|  (")__(")                                         
    [___|[=]__[=]|___]  //    \\                                         

#5265: JFK

Fri, 2013 Nov 22

jfk, topical

              ..... ..                                              
          XXXXX:::XXXXXXXXXXXXX                                     
        XXX:XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX:                                 
      XXXXX:XXXXXXX:XXXXXXX:XXXXX::                                 
     .::IXX::XXXXXX:XXXX::.:':XXXX::        SHUT THE FUCK UP        
    ..::::XX:XXXXXX:XXXX:'::':XXXXX::       ABOUT JFK ALREADY       
   ..:::'X:XXXXXXXX':XXXX:XXXXXXXX':.                               
   ...:X'.'XXXXXXXXX.XXXXXXXXXXXX'XXX:.                             
  ....:X.:XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX:'XXXX:     HE'S DEAD               
  ...."X.XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX"""'' :XXXXXX:    AND HE'S BEEN DEAD FOR  
  ...::'"""''''"'""""'''        :XXXXXX:    A FUCKING LONG TIME NOW 
  ..:.:.....                    .:XXXXX:                            
  :..::.....                    :'XXXXX:                            
   .:::....                     .:XXXXX     NOW GROW A FUCKING PAIR 
    ::''''                      .:XXXXX     AND GET THE FUCK OVER IT
    .      ....,,     ......     :XXXXX                             
  :::   .::"   XXX  ::'   ''":   .XXXX:.                            
  :.:   :::"MM'""X   .:"MM '.     "X";.:                            
  ::'     I:..:.:X    ."''.'      .::' :                            
 ::XI     .    XI                :::  :                             
   :XX         XI                .::"':                             
   :X' .:.     /X.              .:::  .                             
   """....    /XXX.:XX.         ...: .                              
    ":....    '"""'             ..::.                               
     ':...                      ...:                                
      :....  :..:II:II:..:     ...:                                 
      ':....  ::.              ..::                                 
       ':...   '"""""'    .    .:::                                 
         .:...               . ..::::'                              
         ':....            : ..:::XXL:.                             
    ...:::X:...         .:::::'  XXXXXXX                            
.:::XXXXXXX::::::......:::::'   .XXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXXX:::::::::::::::'    .XXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXXX'::::::::::::'   .'.:XXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXXX.'::::::::::'  .'   .XXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXXX   ':::::::'. ,'   .XXXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXXX    ':::::'.;     .XXXXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXXX    .'WWWW.      .XXXXXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXX.   .'WWWWWW     .XXXXXXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXX,   .:WWWW" '    .XXXXXXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXXX  :  WWW'       XXXXXXXXXXXXXX                            
XXXXXXXXX' .  WWW'    .XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX                            

#5310: POLAR VORTEX

Mon, 2014 Jan 6

topical

`-.___________,-._______,-"~-.                                
                              \    SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT     
    ,~``'`'c;                  \   THE GODDAMN WEATHER ALREADY
  ,{    {~\ "                   )                             
   `,}`;}  `^                  /;                             
    ~`  ~`                    / [                             
                             / {`)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~       
-='"'"-~`;-._           __,~`  ;/~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~        
/       / \  `-~`-,_____>     / }~~~~~~~~,=-<7\~~~~~~         
~~~~~~~~~~ \      \          /  \~~~~~~~/   / (~~~~~          
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`   \      '~~~~~~~~~~~~` ~ ' ~~~~~~           
dew                                                           

#5333: STATE OF THE UNION

Wed, 2014 Jan 29

myfreecams, obama, topical

   /\  ,                                                                     
  {Oo\{o\    .=.          OKAY I'VE GOT THE STATE OF THE UNION IN ONE WINDOW 
  {o: \:.\  /   \          AND MYFREECAMS IN THE OTHER                       
 {O:'  \:.-'_.-\_)____                                                       
  {o:.  /`~('-./-----.\    I'M CURRENTLY UNABLE TO TELL WHICH ONE IS         
   }o: // /|         `/\    FAILING TO GIVE ME AN ERECTION                   
  {O:'// /-'         /\/\                                                    
  }o-/( <___    \'/ /\/\/\  ON THE ONE HAND, OBAMA LATELY GIVES DRONING AND  
 /o./  ;--._)====* -\/\/\/   EASILY FORGOTTABLE SPEECHES PLUS THE STATE      
 `"`\  \        /.\  `""`     OF THE UNION IS THE MOST BORING OF ALL         
     \  \                      POSSIBLE PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES                
      \  \                                                                   
jgs   /`\ )                  ON THE OTHER, THIS CAMGIRL IS SINGING           
      |/| |                   AND SINGING BADLY AT THAT                      
    _//  \|                                                                  
   | /   ||                   BUT THEN AGAIN THE WAY SHE MOUNTED THE         
   |/   / |                    DILDO BELOW THE CAMERA TO SIMULATE A          
        `\|                     FIRST-PERSON EXPERIENCE WAS VERY PRESIDENTIAL
          '                                                                  
                               SO EH I DON'T KNOW IT'S A WASH                

#5337: NEWLY CHRISTENED

Sun, 2014 Feb 2

super bowl, topical

                .                                                        
            ____/_                                                       
 \==      .'__===_|           WELCOME TO S.S. DIPSHIT                    
  \_ _ _ /"---'  \/                                                      
  |_|_|_|_\_______\______                                                
  `.==-------------------|_   I MEAN YAY SUPER BOWL MAY THE BEST TEAM WIN
LGB `.___________________/                                               

#5338: SUPER BOWL LETDOWN

Mon, 2014 Feb 3

super bowl, topical

           @@@@@@@@                                                   
         @@@    \| \    NOOOO !!!! THE ${FILL_IN_WINNING_SPORTS_TEAM}S
      @@@@@  (*)  (*)   WON !!!!!!!1111 HOW COULD THE ${COMPETITOR}S  
    @@@@@@       \  \   HAVE LET THAT HAPPEN ?!?!?!?!/1/1/1/1/        
   @@@@@@       __)  )                                                
 @@@@@@     ________(    _  |  |                                      
@@@@@@     /|/|/|/|/    | ' |__|                                      
 @@@@@    |        A |_|| _ |  |                                      
  @@@@@   |  /| /| /|   |_| |  |                                      
ejm97 @@   \/_|/_|/_|       |  |                                      
    @@@@             \                                                
  @@@@@@       _______)                                               
        )         (                                                   

#5372: COSMOS REBOOT

Sun, 2014 Mar 9

carl sagan, cosmos, topical

   .       .                                                          
 +  :      .                                                          
           :       _       I THOUGHT THE COSMOS REMAKE WAS OKAY EXCEPT
       .   !   '  (_)      I FOUND THE FOUR-MINUTE SEQUENCE AT THE END
          ,|.'             WHERE NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON RECOUNTED HOW    
-  -- ---(-O-`--- --  -    CARL SAGAN TRIED TO MOLEST HIM IN ITHACA   
         ,`|'`.            REALLY OVERWROUGHT AND DEPRESSING          
       ,   !    .                                                     
           :       :  "                                               
           .     --+--                                                
 .:        .       !                                                  
                                                                      
O!o                                                                   

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