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#88: DEAN

Mon, 1999 Sep 20

dean, figlet

 ___   _  _   ____  _____    _    _   _ 
|_ _| / \/ \ |  _ \| ____|  / \  | \ | |
 | |  \ kb / | | | |  _|   / _ \ |  \| |
 | |   \  /  | |_| | |___ / ___ \| |\  |
|___|   \/   |____/|_____/_/   \_\_| \_|

#294: SYSTEM NINJA

Thu, 2000 Apr 13

dean

              .-""""-.        .-""""-.               
             /        \      /        \              
            /_        _\    /_        _\             
           // \      / \\  // \      / \\            
           |\__\    /__/|  |\__\    /__/|            
            \    ||    /    \    ||    /             
             \        /      \        /              
              \  __  /        \  __  /               
            /  '.__.'          '.__.'  \             
WAS THAT THE    |  |            |  |    SHUT UP WHERE
SYSTEM NINJA    |  |            |  |    IS MY LIGHTER

#296: MISSING KIM

Sat, 2000 Apr 15

dean, sesame

              .---. .---.      ME MISS KIM!   
             :     : o   :         /          
         _..-:   o :     :-.._    /           
     .-''  '  `---' `---' "   ``-.            
   .'   "   '  "  .    "  . '  "  `.          
  :   '.---.,,.,...,.,.,.,..---.  ' ;         
  `. " `.                     .' " .'         
   `.  '`.                   .' ' .'          
    `.    `-._           _.-' "  .'  .----.   
      `. "    '"--...--"'  . ' .'  .'  o   `. 
      .'`-._'    " .     " _.-'`. :       o  :
    .'      ```--.....--'''    ' `:_ o       :
  .'    "     '         "     "   ; `.;";";";'
 ;         '       "       '     . ; .' ; ; ; 
;     '         '       '   "    .'      .-'  
'  "     "   '      "           "    _.-'     

#297: SUBMARINE

Sun, 2000 Apr 16

dean

                           |`-:_    BUHHHHH                       
  ,----....____            |    `+. /                             
 (             ````----....|___   |                               
  \     _                      ````----....____                   
   \    _)                                     ```---.._          
    \                                                   \         
  )`.\  )`.   )`.   )`.   )`.   )`.   )`.   )`.   )`.   )`.   )   
-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `-'   `

#302: I'M HERE FOR THE CHEESE

Fri, 2000 Apr 21

dean, disney

                                     .,.               .,;;;;;,           
                                    ;;;;;;;,,        ,;;%%%%%;;           
   ARE YOU KIM DO YOU KNOW KIM       `;;;%%%%;;,.  ,;;%%;;%%%;;   FUCK OFF
   DID SHE SEND YOU OR DID SHE          `;%%;;%%%;;,;;%%%%%%%;;'  I'M HERE
   GIVE YOU A MESSAGE FOR GOD'S          `;;%%;;%:,;%%%%%;;%%;;,  FOR THE 
   SAKE I MISS YOU PLEASE COME BACK         `;;%%%,;%%%%%%%%%;;;  CHEESE  
                                               `;:%%%%%%;;%%;;;'          
           ..,,,.                                 .:::::::.               
        .;;;;;;;;;;,.                                  s.                 
        `;;;;;;;;;;;;;,                               ,SSSs.              
          `:.:.:.:.:.:.:.                            ,SSSSSSs.            
           .;;;;;;;;;;;;;::,                        ,SSSSSSSSS,           
          ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;:::%,                    ,SS%;SSSSSSsS          
         ;;;;;;,:,:::::::;::::%%,                  SS%;SSSSSSsSS          
         ;;;;;,::a@@@@@@a::%%%%%%%,.   ...         SS%;SSSSSSSS'          
         `::::::@@@@@@@@@@@a;%%%%%%%%%'  #;        `SS%;SSSSS'            
  .,sSSSSs;%%,::@@@@@@;;' #`@@a;%%%%%'   ,'          `S%;SS'              
sSSSSSSSSSs;%%%,:@@@@a;;   .@@@a;%%sSSSS'           .%%%;SS,              
`SSSSSSSSSSSs;%%%,:@@@a;;;;@@@;%%sSSSS'        ..,,%%%;SSSSSSs.           
  `SSSSSSSSSSSSs;%%,%%%%%%%%%%%SSSS'     ..,,%;sSSS;%;SSSSSSSSs.          
     `SSSSSSSSSSS%;%;sSSSS;""""   ..,,%sSSSS;;SSSS%%%;SSSSSSSSSS.         
         """""" %%;SSSSSS;;%..,,sSSS;%SSSSS;%;%%%;%%%%;SSSSSS;SSS.        
                `;SSSSS;;%%%%%;SSSS;%%;%;%;sSSS;%%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSS        
                 ;SSS;;%%%%%%%%;%;%sSSSS%;SSS;%%%%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSS        
                 `S;;%%%%%%%%%%%%%SSSSS;%%%;%%%%%%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSS        
                  ;SS;%%%%%%%%%%%%;%;%;%%;%%%%%%%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSS'        
                  SS;%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%;%%%%%%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSS'          
                  SS;%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%;%%%%%%%%%%%;SSSSS;SSS'            
                  SS;%%%%%%%%%%%%%;sSSs;%%%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSSS              
                  `SS;%%%%%%%%%%%%%%;SS;%%%%%%;SSSSSS;SSSS'               
                   `S;%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%;S;%%%%%;SSSS;SSSSS%                 
                    `S;%;%%%%%%%%%%%'   `%%%%;SSS;SSSSSS%.                
                    ,S;%%%%%%%%%%;'      `%%%%%;S   `SSSSs%,.             
                  ,%%%%%%%%%%;%;'         `%;%%%;     `SSSs;%%,.          
               ,%%%%%%;;;%;;%;'           .%%;%%%       `SSSSs;%%.        
            ,%%%%%' .%;%;%;'             ,%%;%%%'         `SSSS;%%        
          ,%%%%'   .%%%%'              ,%%%%%'             `SSs%%'        
        ,%%%%'    .%%%'              ,%%%%'                ,%%%'          
      ,%%%%'     .%%%              ,%%%%'                 ,%%%'           
    ,%%%%'      .%%%'            ,%%%%'                  ,%%%'            
  ,%%%%'        %%%%           ,%%%'                    ,%%%%             
  %%%%'       .:::::         ,%%%'                      %%%%'             
.:::::        :::::'       ,%%%'                       ,%%%%              
:::::'                   ,%%%%'                        %%%%%              
                        %%%%%'                         %%%%%              
                      .::::::                        .::::::              
                      ::::::'                        ::::::'              

#304: ONE DAY

Sun, 2000 Apr 23

dean

#                                                                   
 ##                                                                 
 ###                                                                
  ####                                                              
   #####                                                            
   #######                                                          
    #######                                                         
    ########                    ONE DAY, ONE DAY I WILL BE          
    ########                    IMMORTAL                            
    #########                                                       
    ##########                  THEN YOU WILL ALL BE SORRY          
   ############                 OH BOY WILL YOU ALL BE SORRY        
 ##############                                                     
################                       /                            
 ################                     /                             
   ##############                    /                              
    ##############                  /                           ####
    ##############                 /                         #####  
     ##############               /                      #######    
     ##############              /                  ###########     
     ###############            /                 #############     
     ################                           ##############      
    #################      #                  ################      
    ##################     ##    #           #################      
   ####################   ###   ##          #################       
        ################  ########          #################       
         ################  #######         ###################      
           #######################       #####################      
            #####################       ###################         
              ############################################          
               ###########################################          
               ##########################################           
                ########################################            
                ########################################            
                 ######################################             
                 ######################################             
                  ##########################      #####             
                  ###  ###################           ##             
                  ##    ###############                             
                  #     ##  ##########                              
                            ##    ###                               
                                  ###                               
                                  ##                                
                                  #                                 

#315: SOON I WILL BE IMMORTAL

Thu, 2000 May 4

dean

                _                                            
            ,.-" "-.,                                        
           /   ===   \                                       
          /  =======  \                                      
       __|  (o)   (0)  |__                                   
      / _|    .---.    |_ \                                  
     | /.----/ O O \----.\ |                                 
      \/     |     |     \/                                  
      |                   |                                  
      |                   | ----- SOON I WILL BE IMMORTAL    
      |                   |       AND THEN THEY WILL ALL STOP
      _\   -.,_____,.-   /_       LAUGHING AT MY BOOTS       
  ,.-"  "-.,_________,.-"  "-.,                              
 /          |       |          \                             
|           l.     .l           |                            
|            |     |            |                            
l.           |     |           .l                            
 |           l.   .l           | \,                          
 l.           |   |           .l   \,                        
  |           |   |           |      \,                      
  l.          |   |          .l        |                     
   |          |   |          |         |                     
   |          |---|          |         |                     
   |          |   |          |         |                     
   /"-.,__,.-"\   /"-.,__,.-"\"-.,_,.-"\                     
  |            \ /            |         |                    
  |             |             |         |                    
   \__|__|__|__/ \__|__|__|__/ \_|__|__/                     

#324: THIS MEANS YOU

Sat, 2000 May 13

dean

         STOP STALKING ME          
           ___________    ____     
    ______/   \__//   \__/____\    
  _/   \_/  :           //____\\   
 /|      :  :  ..      /        \  
| |     ::     ::      \        /  
| |     :|     ||     \ \______/   
| |     ||     ||      |\  /  |    
 \|     ||     ||      |   / | \   
  |     ||     ||      |  / /_\ \  
  | ___ || ___ ||      | /  /    \ 
   \_-_/  \_-_/ | ____ |/__/      \
                _\_--_/    \      /
               /____             / 
              /     \           /  
              \______\_________/   
                                   
          THIS MEANS YOU           

#326: SHUT UP

Mon, 2000 May 15

dean

          _ _              
     _(,_/ \ \____________ 
     |`. \_@_@   `.     ,' 
     |\ \ .        `-,-'   
     || |  `-.____,-'      
     || /  /               
     |/ |  |   IF YOU HEARD
`..     /   \  MY SALARY   
  \\   /    |  YOU WOULD   
  ||  |      \ FAINT       
   \\ /-.    |             
   ||/  /_   |             
   \(_____)-'_)            
                           
             _ _           
____________/ / \_.)_      
`.     ,'   @_@_/ ,'|      
  `-.-'        , / /|      
     `-.____,-'  | ||      
              \  \ ||      
  FUCKING     |  | \|      
  SHUT UP    /   \     ,,' 
             |    \   //   
            /      |  ||   
            |    ,-\ //    
            |   _\  \||    
           (_`-(_____)/    

#329: WRITER AND EDITOR

Thu, 2000 May 18

dean

  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___.---------------.     
.'\__\'\__\'\__\'\__\'\__,`   .  ____ ___ \    
|\/ __\/ __\/ __\/ __\/ _:\   |`.  \  \___ \   
 \\'\__\'\__\'\__\'\__\'\_`.__|""`. \  \___ \  
  \\/ __\/ __\/ __\/ __\/ __:                \ 
   \\'\__\'\__\'\__\ \__\'\_;-----------------`
    \\/   \/   \/   \/   \/ :                 |
     \|______________________;________________|
                                               
  I PICTURE EACH ONE OF THE CHOCOLATE SQUARES  
  AS ONE OF THE PEOPLE I HATE & THEN I WHEN I  
  EAT THEM THEY CRY & SCREAM & SO I CAN PROVE  
  ONCE & FOR ALL THAT I AM A VAMPIRE & SYSTEM  
  NINJA & A WRITER & EDITOR OF A FAMOUS EZINE  

#331: A BRIDGE TOO FAR

Sat, 2000 May 20

allegra, dean

                                    STOP CRANK CALLING ME            
I'M THINKING ABOUT ALLEGRA                  /                        
    \                                     ^^                         
     ^^      ..                                       ..             
             []                                       []             
           .:[]:_          ^^                       ,:[]:.           
         .: :[]: :-.         \                   ,-: :[]: :.         
       .: : :[]: : :`._  SHUT YOUR WORD HOLE  ,.': : :[]: : :.       
     .: : : :[]: : : : :-._               _,-: : : : :[]: : : :.     
 _..: : : : :[]: : : : : : :-._________.-: : : : : : :[]: : : : :-._ 
 _:_:_:_:_:_:[]:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:_:[]:_:_:_:_:_:_ 
 !!!!!!!!!!!![]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![]!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 ^^^^^^^^^^^^[]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[]^^^^^^^^^^^^^
             []                                       []             
             []          SHUT UP ALL OF YOU           []             
             []                                       []             
  ~~^-~^_~^~/  \~^-~^~_~^-~_^~-^~_^~~-^~_~^~-~_~-^~_^/  \~^-~_~^-~~- 
 ~ _~~- ~^-^~-^~~- ^~_^-^~~_ -~^_ -~_-~~^- _~~_~-^_ ~^-^~~-_^-~ ~^   
    ~ ^- _~~_-  ~~ _ ~  ^~  - ~~^ _ -  ^~-  ~ _  ~~^  - ~_   - ~^_~  
      ~-  ^_  ~^ -  ^~ _ - ~^~ _   _~^~-  _ ~~^ - _ ~ - _ ~~^ -      
         ~^ -_ ~^^ -_ ~ _ - _ ~^~-  _~ -_   ~- _ ~^ _ -  ~ ^-        
             ~^~ - _ ^ - ~~~ _ - _ ~-^ ~ __- ~_ - ~  ~^_-            
                 ~ ~- ^~ -  ~^ -  ~ ^~ - ~~  ^~ - ~                  

#341: NIGHTMARES

Tue, 2000 May 30

dean

      _____|~~\_____      _____________     
  _-~               \    |    \             
  _-    | )     \    |__/   \   \           
  _-         )   |   |  |     \  \          
  _-    | )     /    |--|      |  |         
 __-_______________ /__/_______|  |_________
(                |----         |  |         
 `---------------'--\\\\      .`--'         
                              `||||         
                                            
         SLEEPY HEAD, SLEEPY HEAD           
         I DREAM OF JEANIE                  
         ALSO BONERS                        
         AND KIM BUT THOSE ARE NIGHTMARES   

#347: CALL THE ENCLAVE

Mon, 2000 Jun 5

dean

    /\  ____   CALL THE ENCLAVE
    <> ( oo ) /                
    <>_| ^^ |_                 
    <>    @   \                
   /~~\ . . _ |                
  /~~~~\    | |                
 /~~~~~~\/ _| |                
 |[][][]/ / [m]                
 |[][][[m]                     
 |[][][]|                      
 |[][][]|                      
 |[][][]|                      
 |[|--|]|                      
 |[|  |]|                      
 ========                      
==========                     
|[[    ]]|                     
==========                     

#348: WHY I HANG OUT WITH YOU

Tue, 2000 Jun 6

dean

DID I MENTION THAT I KNOW                      I DON'T KNOW WHY THE
KARATE AND CAN PUT YOU IN                      FUCK I HANG OUT WITH
A NON-LETHAL MODIFIED                                    YOU ANYWAY
CHOKE HOLD                                                         
                                                                   
       \                                                    /      
        \                                                  /       
                                                                   
          _                                              _         
     \. _(9>                                            <6)_ ,/    
      \==_)                                              (_==/     
       -'=                                                ='-      

#354: WAY OVER HERE

Mon, 2000 Jun 12

dean

                    ,,,,,,                                    
i miss kim      o#'9MMHb':'-,o,                               
        \    .oH":HH$' "' ' -*R&o,                            
         \  dMMM*""'`'      .oM"HM?.                          
          ,MMM'          "HLbd< ?&H\                          
         .:MH ."\          ` MM  MM&b                         
        . "*H    -        &MMMMMMMMMH:                        
        .    dboo        MMMMMMMMMMMM.                        
        .   dMMMMMMb      *MMMMMMMMMP.                        
        .    MMMMMMMP        *MMMMMP .                        
             `#MMMMM           MM6P ,                         
         '    `MMMP"           HM*`,                          
          '    :MM             .- , \                         
           '.   `#?..  .       ..'   \                        
              -.   .         .-    EVEN FUCKING WAY OVER      
                ''-.oo,oo.-''      HERE WE KNOW THAT YOU FREAK

#355: THINK

Tue, 2000 Jun 13

dean

J U S T                                                                    
                                                                           
         ,--.,                        .-=~\                    .-=~\       
        '.   \`'-..___|         -.  .'    )}                 .'    )}      
              `'--..__`'--.,____,/ /     //                 /     //       
                  _.--|"'---.-~~  {     //   _             {     /         
               _-^    |           |   .;'   (_)            |   .;'         
              /       |_          |_.-~     _    _         |_.-~           
             {        (_)       '-|/.-._   / \  / \.-._  '-|/.-._          
             |        |           |=/~-,\  `||  `| /~-,\   |=/~-,)         
             {,                   |{    })  ||   |{    })  |{_./{          
              \\                  ||    ||  ||   ||    ||  |/ ~^\\         
               \^.__              ||    |)  ||   ||    |)  ||    |)        
                ^-._^~~--..__.-^  ( ^)  /   ( ^) ( ^)  /   ( ^)  /         
                    ^~~--...-'     ""  (^)   ""   ""  (^)   ""  (^)        
                                                                           
                                                                      . . .
                                                                           
                                                                           
                          EVERYBODY FUCKING HATES YOU                      

#360: THE GAY SPIDER

Sun, 2000 Jun 18

dean

       \                                        
        \____________/                          
        /\__________/\                          
       / /\________/\ \                         
      / / /\______/\ \ \                        
     / / / /\____/\ \ \ \                       
    / / / / /\  /\ \ \ \ \                      
___/_/_/_/_/__\/__\_\_\_\_\____                 
   \ \ \ \ \  /\  / / / / /  |                  
    \ \ \ \ \/__\/ / / / /   |                  
     \ \ \ \/____\/ / / /    |                  
      \ \ \/______\/ / /     |                  
       \ \/________\/ /      |                  
        \/__________\/       * DICKS !!!!!!!!!!!
        /            \                          
       /              \                         
                       \                        

#365: YOU'RE A VAMPIRE

Fri, 2000 Jun 23

dean

SERIOUSLY DO YOU                             
THINK SHE'LL COME BACK                       
                                             
     \                                       
        _,_              __   __             
     ._(@I@)_.          /  \-/  \            
    .--{___}--.       ._\   |   /_.          
    .-/  Y  \-.       .__\__Y__/__.          
     /   |   \           _{___}_             
     \__/-\__/          ' (@I@) '            
                           ~^~               
                                             
                               \             
                                             
                    JESUS MAN GET OVER IT AND
                    GET YOURSELF A NEW WOMAN 
                                             
                    BUT THIS TIME DON'T TELL 
                    HER YOU'RE A VAMPIRE     

#369: ONE OF THESE DAYS

Tue, 2000 Jun 27

dean

    ^^      .-=-=-=-.  ^^                                               
^^        (`-=-=-=-=-`)         ^^                                      
        (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)  ^^         ^^                                
  ^^   (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)   ^^                            ^^           
      ( `-=-=-=-(@)-=-=-` )      ^^                          \          
      (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)  ^^                               I MISS KIM
      (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)              ^^                             
      (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)                      ^^                     
      (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)  ^^                    \                    
       (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)          ^^         SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH  
        (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-`)  ^^                 ^^                        
          (`-=-=-=-=-`)                         \                       
           `-=-=-=-=-`             JESUS CHRIST WHAT IS UP WITH THIS GUY
                                                                        
               ^^                                                       
                 \                                                      
             ONE OF THESE FUCKING DAYS                                  

#370: THESE ARE MY DEMANDS

Wed, 2000 Jun 28

dean

                                      ____               ____           
      _=______________________-_     /,,,,\_____________/,,,,\          
  =< ' | ========|______________    |,(  )/,,,,,,,,,,,,,\(  ),|         
    \| | ========|______________     \__,,,,___,,,,,___,,,,__/          
    /  | ========|/                    /,,,/(')\,,,/(')\,,,\            
   |   | ========|'                   |,,,,___ _____ ___,,,,|           
   |___| ________'                    |,,,/   \\o_o//   \,,,|           
  '.... /  |  |                       |,,|       |       |,,|           
 |......|  \  |                       |,,|   \__/|\__/   |,,|           
 |......|-____'                        \,,\     \_/     /,,/            
 |......|                               \__\___________/__/             
'.......|                    _____________/,,,,,,,,,,,,,\_____________  
|.......|                   / \,,,,,,,,,,,,,___________,,,,,,,,,,,,,/ \ 
|_______)                  (   ),,,,,,,,,,,/           \,,,,,,,,,,,(   )
                            \_/_________,,/             \,,_________\_/ 
                                                                        
                   OKAY LISTEN UP THESE ARE MY DEMANDS                  
                   I WANT ONE COPY OF FANGORIA (A RECENT                
                   ISSUE NOT THE OLD STUFF) AND THREE                   
                   BOXES OF MILK DUDS AND I WANT KIM UP                 
                   HERE FRONT AND CENTER OR THE TEDDY                   
                   BEAR GETS IT                                         

#372: WHAT DOES A WORM DO

Fri, 2000 Jun 30

dean

     __                            WHAT DOES A WORM DO             
     \_}                                                           
    .-./--.                                 \                      
   /# ^^   \                                   __                  
   |       |                                  ("_\   .-.   .-.   /)
    \     /                                      \\_//^\\_//^\\_// 
     `"`"`                                        `"`   `"`   `"`  
                                                                   
                                                                   
                                                                   
                      IT WRIGGLES ON THE GROUND AND MISSES KIM     
                      AND CALLS EVERYBODY LIARS                    
                                                                   
                     /                                             
                  __                                               
(\   .-.   .-.   /_")                                              
 \\_//^\\_//^\\_//                                                 
  `"`   `"`   `"`                                                  
                                                                   
                                                                   
                                                                   
     __               DING                                         
     \_}                                                           
    .-./--.           /                                            
   /# ^^   \       __                                              
   |       |      ("_\   .-.   .-.   /)                            
    \     /          \\_//^\\_//^\\_//                             
     `"`"`            `"`   `"`   `"`                              

#406: KIM STORIES

Thu, 2000 Aug 3

dean

 BLAH BLAH BLAH                            NO FUCKING DUH               
I NEVER SHUT UP                            I'M TIRED OF YOUR KIM STORIES
               \                         /                              
                 ______            _____                                
                 \     \.        ./    /|                               
                 |`\_____\      /_____/ |                               
                 |` |    |      |    | '|                               
    __-====-__   |  |    |      |    |  |                               
   (~<       >~>_|  |    |      |    |  |_ __-====-__                   
   {~~-====--~~:  \ |    |      |    | /  (~<       >~>                 
   !~~------~~/----`+----/      \----+----\~~-====--~~!                 
    \         \___     /         \     ___/         /                   
     >------\     \  <             >  /     /------<                    
    <_________________>           <_________________>                   

#415: GET THAT THING OUT OF MY FACE

Sat, 2000 Aug 12

dean

CHECK THIS OUT HOMEY I HAVE THESE FUNKY ASS SAMPLES UP ON MY WEB PAGE THAT
EVERYBODY READS AND REALLY LIKES AND WHICH MAKES ME A WEB DEVELOPER AND A 
CONSULTANT AND EVERYBODY LOVES ME AND EVERYTHING IS ALL HER FAULT         
                                                                          
      \                    OKAY FUCKFACE IF YOU WOULD GET YOUR THUMB OUT  
                           OF YOUR DUMB ASS MAYBE YOU'D REALIZE THAT      
      ___                  YOU'VE BLOCKED EVERYBODY FROM YOUR PAGES       
    ,'._,`.                                                               
   (-.___.-)               ALSO MAYBE YOU COULD GET THAT THING OUT OF MY  
   (-.___.-)               FACE                                           
   `-.___.-'                                         /                    
    ((  @ @|              .            __                                 
     \   ` |         ,\   |`.    @|   |  |      _.-._                     
    __`.`=-=mm===mm:: |   | |`.   |   |  |    ,'=` '=`.                   
   (    `-'|:/  /:/  `/  @| | |   |, @| @|   /---)W(---\                  
    \ \   / /  / /         @| |   '         (----| |----) ,~              
    |\ \ / /| / /            @|              \---| |---/  |               
    | \ V /||/ /                              `.-| |-,'   |               
    |  `-' |V /                                 \| |/    @'               
    |    , |-'                                 __| |__                    
    |    .;: _,-.                         ,--""..| |..""--.               
    ;;:::' "    )                        (`--::__|_|__::--')              
  ,-"      _,  /                          \`--...___...--'/               
 (    -:--'/  /                           /`--...___...--'\               
  "-._  `"'._/                           /`---...___...---'\              
      "-._   "---.                      (`---....___....---')             
       .' ",._ ,' )                     |`---....___....---'|             
       /`._|  `|  |                     (`---....___....---')             
      (   \    |  /                      \`---...___...---'/              
       `.  `,  ^""                        `:--...___...--;'               
         `.,'                               `-._______.-'                 

#419: I'M THE VICTIM

Wed, 2000 Aug 16

dean

.           ..         .           .       .           .           .           
      .         .            .          .       .                              
            .         ..xxxxxxxxxx....               .       .             .   
    .             MWMWMWWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMW                       .            
              IIIIMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMttii:        .           .        
 .      IIYVVXMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWxx...         .           .
     IWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMx..                  
   IIWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWBY%ZACH%AND%OWENMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMx..        .    
    ""MWMWMWMWMWM"""""""".  .:..   ."""""MWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWti.         
 .     ""   . `  .: . :. : .  . :.  .  . . .  """"MWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMti= 
        . .   :` . :   .  .'.' '....xxxxx...,'. '   ' ."""YWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMW+
     ; . ` .  . : . .' :  . ..XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx.    `     . "YWMWMWMWMWMWMW
.    .  .  .    . .   .  ..XXXXXXXXWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWXXXX.  .     .     """""""  
        ' :  : . : .  ...XXXXXWWW"   W88N88@888888WWWWWXX.   .   .       . .   
   . ' .    . :   ...XXXXXXWWW"    M88N88GGGGGG888^8M "WMBX.          .   ..  :
         :     ..XXXXXXXXWWW"     M88888WWRWWWMW8oo88M   WWMX.     .    :    . 
           "XXXXXXXXXXXXWW"       WN8888WWWWW  W8@@@8M    BMBRX.         .  : :
  .       XXXXXXXX=MMWW":  .      W8N888WWWWWWWW88888W      XRBRXX.  .       . 
     ....  ""XXXXXMM::::. .        W8@889WWWWWM8@8N8W      . . :RRXx.    .     
         ``...'''  MMM::.:.  .      W888N89999888@8W      . . ::::"RXV    .  : 
 .       ..'''''      MMMm::.  .      WW888N88888WW     .  . mmMMMMMRXx        
      ..' .            ""MMmm .  .       WWWWWWW   . :. :,miMM"""  : ""`    .  
   .                .       ""MMMMmm . .  .  .   ._,mMMMM"""  :  ' .  :        
               .                  ""MMMMMMMMMMMMM""" .  : . '   .        .     
          .              .     .    .                      .         .         
.                                         .          .         .               
                                                                               
                                                                               
                                                                               
                                      -><-                                     
                                                                               
     I SEE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME AND NOT BUYING MY "I'M THE VICTIM" STANCE      
                                                                               
     TIME FOR MORE DRASTIC ACTION: THE "I'M REALLY AWFULLY FAT AND CAN'T       
                  MOVE AROUND WITHOUT OUTSIDE HELP" STANCE                     

#427: GROW SOME BALLS

Thu, 2000 Aug 24

dean

   ... MAYBE IF I BREAK MY ARM AND SET IT TWICE SHE'LL COME BACK TO ME ....
                                                                           
     /                                                                     
    /                                                                      
                                                                           
  O    _______________                                                     
 /\_  _|             |                                                     
_\__`[_______________|                                                     
] [ \, ][         ][                                                       
                                                                           
                                                                           
                                                                           
                                                                           
                            MY GOD MAN GROW SOME BALLS ALREADY             
                                                                           
                                                               \           
                                                                \          
                                                                           
                                                                 \o/       
                                                                  |        
                                                                 / \       

#1137: NEW MARKETING TECHNIQUE

Sun, 2002 Aug 4

dean

                   /~@@~\,                           
 _______ . _\_\___/\ __ /\___|_|_ . _______          
~|    |\|=|======\\______//======|=|/|    |~         
 |_   |    \      |      |      /    |    |          
  \==-|     \     | DEAN |     /     |----|~~)       
  |   |      |    |      |    |      |____/~/        
  |   |       \____\____/____/      /    / /         
  |   |         {----------}       /____/ /          
  |___|        /~~~~~~~~~~~~\     |_/~|_|/           
   \_/        [/~~~~~||~~~~~\]     /__|\             
   | |         |    ||||    |     (/|[[\)            
   [_]        |     |  |     |                       
              |_____|  |_____|   BZZZ                
 BONK         (_____)  (_____)          BURP         
              |     |  |     | BOOP                  
      DONK    |     |  |     |                       
              |/~~~\|  |/~~~\|       CALL THE ENCLAVE
 HONK         /|___|\  /|___|\                       
             <_______><_______>                      

#1181: SAVE YOUR SOUL

Tue, 2002 Sep 17

dean

    ****                                                
    ****                                                
    ****                                                
************                                            
************                                            
    ****                                                
    ****                                                
    ****          IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO SAVE YOUR SOUL.
    ****                                                
    ****          DEDICATE YOUR LIFE TO CHRIST TODAY.   
    ****                                                
    ****          ALSO TELL KIM TO COME BACK TO ME.     
    ****                                                

#1189: GAY IN SPACE

Wed, 2002 Sep 25

dean

 ___________________          _-_                              
 \==============_=_/ ____.---'---`---.____  GAY IN SPACE PEOPLE
             \_ \    \----._________.----/                     
               \ \   /  /    `-_-'                             
           __,--`.`-'..'-_                                     
          /____          ||               CALL THE ENCLAVE     
               `--.____,-'                                     
                                                               
                -.        CRANK CALLS      .-                  
              _..-'(                       )`-.._              
           ./'. '||\\.       (\_/)       .//||` .`\.           
        ./'.|'.'||||\\|..    )o o(    ..|//||||`.`|.`\.        
     ./'..|'.|| |||||\`````` '`"'` ''''''/||||| ||.`|..`\.     
   ./'.||'.|||| ||||||||||||.     .|||||||||||| ||||.`||.`\.   
  /'|||'.|||||| ||||||||||||{     }|||||||||||| ||||||.`|||`\  
 '.|||'.||||||| ||||||||||||{     }|||||||||||| |||||||.`|||.` 
'.||| ||||||||| |/'   ``\||``     ''||/''   `\| ||||||||| |||.`
|/' \./'     `\./         \!|\   /|!/         \./'     `\./ `\|
V    V         V          }' `\ /' `{          V         V    V
`    `         `               V               '         '    '
                                                               
                    MY PEOPLE CALL IT GUANO                    

#1219: QUIET YOU

Fri, 2002 Oct 25

dean

                       |>>>                           
                       |                              
                   _  _|_  _                          
                  |;|_|;|_|;|                         
                  \\.    .  /                         
                   \\:  .  /                          
                    ||:   |                           
                    ||:.  |                           
                    ||:  .|        i miss kim         
                    ||:   |       \,/                 
                    ||: , |            /`\            
                    ||:   |              quiet you    
                    ||: . |                           
                   _||_   |                           
           __ ----~    ~`---,              ___        
---__ ,--~'                  ~~----_____-~'   `~----~~
     `                                                

#1431: ALT FAN NEWSGROUP ABUSE ABUSE ABUSE

Sun, 2003 May 25

dean, usenet

      ___________________________________             
     |.-.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.-.|  WHO       
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||  NEWGROUPED
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||  DEAN      
     ||_|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|_||  STARK     
     [_>_______________________________<_]            
     ||"|""|""|""|""|""|""|""|""|""|""|"||            
     || |  |  |  |  |  |  |  |  |  |  | ||            
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||            
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||            
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||            
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||            
     ||(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)(_)||            
jgs  |'-'--'--'--'--'--'--'--'--'--'--'-'|            
     `"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""`            

#1722: ALPHA WAFFLE CANCEL FAQ

Thu, 2004 Mar 11

dean

                                      ,o                        
                                  }-=')-<                       
          .                                                     
         :                           ^^^                        
        (_)              ___         |||                        
         .  :          _(   ")       `+'                        
         . o          (  _)\ .{}{}}.  |                         
          .            )/ "( {}-_-{}  |  ALPHA WAFFLE CANCEL FAQ
        O .          .-_) _) `,{=}._  |                         
        : o.        //   (.---{{{}}_)( \                        
          .   (.___/(_, .(   "-`}'-   T \                       
         O     "--._ |`- / \ _     _ /|  )                      
         .o         / .  | |`---^---'||-"                       
---.-""."-._____.-.'`-._.\^|\_  .:_/_|_.---"-""-.-."-.____.-.__ 
        .       :   ._  /\ ("-.___.-( |                   ,-.   
         :     (      .'  \_)        \|7                 .' /   
                :    (     \          |.                /  <    
                 \    \    _`.      ) . "-._          .'/  |    
                  `. )'`.-" /| /-._  )'    )""--.__.-','  /     
                    `-._   < `(    ""--.__  )'        _  \      
                        `.  |             """....---"" "._)  ojo

#1847: 91 NEWSGROUPS

Wed, 2004 Jul 14

dean

                 ,                                           
 \.             /J         ..---..      .-```-.              
  L`\   \-.__.-`  L    .-``       ``-. /       \             
  |  \   \        J  .`   _.          `.       J    D E A N  
  J   \   `\       L/   /`  \    .   \  \      |             
  |    \    `,     |    ``-.o\  /_.-``\  L     L    S T A R K
  L     `\   |     J    ,    `/\`    ,   |    J              
 J        `\ /      L  /(     ``     )\  J    |     L I C K S
 |      ,   `\      |  `\`---.....--`/`  |    L              
 L      |     `     |    \  (__Y__) /    L-.-'        D I C K
J       |\          |     `-.____.-`    /  __                
|       | \         |`.               .`  (  )               
 `-._.-`   \        |  `-..       ..-`     `-`               
            `-.___.-`      ``---``                           

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