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#1142: ANY KIND OF DINOSAUR

Fri, 2002 Aug 9

wishful thinking

  ."".    ."",   IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF DINOSAUR
  |  |   /  /   I'D BE A JERKOFFINACUPOSAURUS      
  |  |  /  /                                       
  |  | /  /                                        
  |  |/  ;-._                                      
  }  ` _/  / ;                                     
  |  /` ) /  /                                     
  | /  /_/\_/\                                     
  |/  /      |                                     
  (  ' \ '-  |                                     
   \    `.  /                                      
    |      |                                       
jgs |      |                                       

#2224: CHALUPA

Tue, 2005 Jul 26

wishful thinking

      ,                                      
     (&)                                     
    , ;                                      
    |\|_,                                    
   .|   |;                                   
   (,)  |   IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF CHALUPA
  .( (';)    I'D BE A SUPREME CHALUPA        
   (  . (                                    
   ) (   )                                   
   (  ) )',                                  
   ).'   (                                   
  ( .-( '.;                                  
  ) )  '-._)                                 
 (_.'      \`                                
 /`'-------'\                                
(`'---------')                               
 \          /                                
  \        /                                 
   `,_____'lds                               

#2225: A NEW BARYON HAS BEEN DISCOVERED

Wed, 2005 Jul 27

particle, wishful thinking

      _                                         
  .nNNNNNn.     IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF BARYON
 /NNNNN(#\N\_      I'D BE THE ANAL RAPIST BARYON
|NNNNNNN\#)N|NNn_                               
 \NNNNNNNNN/N(#\N\                              
  "*NNNNN*"NNN\#)N|                             
      "\NNNNNNNNN/                              
        "*NNNNN*"                               
            "                                   

#2479: COCCYX

Fri, 2006 Apr 7

wishful thinking

       __               ___                                           
      (_  )            /  _)                                          
       ,\_'            '_;                                            
      .-.-.     _,    .-.-.      IF I COULD BE ANY BONE IN THE HUMAN  
     /| _\ \      \  / /_ |\      BODY WHY OBVIOUSLY I'D BE THE COCCYX
    ` \/\_| '--,.   ' |/\_/ '                                         
    | _ ;_               ;_ |                                         
    ,.\\/_)            < /.)`,                                        
      \  |              `-/                                           
       \ |              |/                                            
       o o              o                                             
       | |               \                                            
       | |               \\_                                          
n4b1s ,-_-_              _'                                           

#2516: HOLIDAY MEAL

Sun, 2006 May 14

topical, wishful thinking

                 .--.                                            
 {\             / q {\                                           
 { `\           \ (-(~`                                          
{ '.{`\          \ \ )     IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF HOLIDAY MEAL
{'-{ ' \  .-""'-. \ \               I'D BE A TURDUCKEN           
{._{'.' \/       '.) \                                           
{_.{.   {`            |                                          
{._{ ' {   ;'-=-.     |                                          
 {-.{.' {  ';-=-.`    /                                          
  {._.{.;    '-=-   .'                                           
   {_.-' `'.__  _,-'                                             
      jgs   |||`                                                 
           .='==,                                                

#2550: DRINKY BIRD

Sat, 2006 Jun 17

wishful thinking

     _                                                        
----(O)    IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF BIRD I'D BE A DRINKY BIRD
      \                                                       
       \_                                                     
       ( `'--.,                                               
        `,___/                                                
          |_\                                                 
         /|                                                   
         `|                                                   
          ^      Asik                                         

#2668: MICHAEL BAY

Fri, 2006 Oct 13

wishful thinking

   . . .                                                             
,      ` ` ---. ___. .-._                                            
             `      ,   , ` -_.                                      
.   .      ,  ,    a.aaaaa.__a8    IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF BAY     
, .   ,   ...--,a8P"  "Y888888a                                      
 ,   .a8a'/    `  \_       _ 8|    I'D BE MICHAEL BAY                
   .a88P    .       \ -' .a8|/                                       
.aa8P"     a         \aaP'  '\                                       
 \   \    a8   '      \.  -' /                                       
      \  / Y         ,a8   _/  _____                                 
 \__   `X   \  ___/  `Y8  a8\      ---__________                     
    \_       \        a \/  |   _________       __________           
     a  ._  _/_      a8a   /;                      _____             
  __/P8    \  "8a. ./Y"8-__a:.    |.                                 
 /a"" \.   a.    a88a'    88:     |                                  
      /8a  Y8a    8P_  _  a8.:    |                                  
--., / `878/88a._./?:\____a;; .   |                                  
   a__   \:::.::.::.::.;;'.''     |                          ____    
-_  `'\__/:.: ,:." .    .   .     |                                  
 a.   /:.:. . .                   | =>.-.                            
  \_ /::. ,                     .-|| |]- )                           
    |:.                      .-\ a8"-'.-'/___                        
.   \:  .                  .'\ '   .-'  /                            
\.   /.                    (_/\_.-'  _:'   .aaaa.                    
 \:_/.  .              ___ \ (  _..:='  .a:8888P                     
  \:.                    ---\| /:='___-.88888P'                      
   |: .                      `"'  ...:88888P'                        
   /. .       ___                 888888P' . .                       
 ----_                            `8P"'                        ___   
   _  \                                                              
  /   /                       ___                                    
     a:                                                              
    .' \_                                                            
   <     \ -.                                 ______                 
__/ Y     a`   \      ___                                            
  __/\  \/   `  `                     ,O                             
           `  `                  __- .//`-  __                       
               `           _o_      < )  .a                          
     `      `             `/   --    '  a8'                        __
                `         ' aP                                       
  `               `                                                  
      .////oO       `                          __                    
     ////'<>          `                                              
                   `    `                                            
         `  _.,             `                                        
           ()() ,        `       `                                   
  `   (_);     ;                   `                                 
     (_){        `.                    `                             
_ . '           .-              `        `                           
            , '                            `       .====_            
-  _     ` (               `         `     _`    _/      \------.    
     - .     .  `                      _--/  \__/      x         \a:f
         -. .          `          _---\                   ,          
\__    __          _.       ` ___/                 \ /               
   \__/  \    ___,/  \_______/             \J,                       
          \__/                                                       

#2735: SUBTLE NAMES

Tue, 2006 Dec 19

pornstar, wishful thinking

      .-.                                     
     (/^\)                                    
     (\ /)                                    
     .-'-.     IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF BOOBS
    /(_I_)\                                   
    \\) (//                                   
     /   \     I'D BE ASHLEY JUGGS' BOOBS     
     \ | /                                    
      \|/                                     
      /|\                                     
      \|/                                     
jgs   /Y\                                     

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