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#5: JASMINE

Tue, 1999 Jun 29

disney

I DIDN'T LISTEN TO MY                                                     
MOTHER ABOUT CROSSING                                                     
MY EYES SO THEY STUCK                                                     
THIS WAY                                                                  
                                                                          
HOLY GOD I NEED TOOL                                                      
                                                                          
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#371: SEX OFFENDER

Thu, 2000 Jun 29

                            CASE #729357035                                
       WANTED FOR DICKLICKING AND FATFUCKING IN THE FIRST DEGREE           
                         SUSPENDED TIME SERVED                             
         WHEN MOVING INTERSTATE MUST REGISTER AS A SEX OFFENDER            
                          AND A FUCKING FAGGOT                             
                                                                           
                                  o o o                                    
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#736: MY JULY 4TH PLANS

Fri, 2001 Jun 29

                      MY JULY 4TH PLANS                               
                                                                      
                       I>>>>>                         \  /            
                     / H \                          -   o  -          
                    /  H  \                           /  \            
  GOOD CHRIST      /   H   \                                          
                  /    H    \                   \  /    I NEVER KNEW  
    \            /     H     \                -   o  -  HOMOSEXUALITY 
     \          /      H      \                 /  \    WOULD CHAFE   
      \        /       H  H32  \                        THIS BAD      
       \      /        H        \                                     
        \    /         H         \       HUFF             /     \  /  
            /          H          \                      /    -   o  -
           /           H           \      /     OW      /       /  \  
          /            H            \    /             /              
         /             H             \            \   /               
        /              H              \                               
       /               H               \  o____ _______/_____         
                       H                \/====/ \-----/ ------        
             \_________H_________________\              /====/        
\___/__________\_______H_______________________________/__            
 \                                                         \  RIK     
   \                                                        \         
     \                                                       /        
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~     

#1101: GOOD QUESTION

Sat, 2002 Jun 29

jerkcity

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      b_n     b/T\/` /(Wn!                             
      b,`     _n>!-.._Ga:   HOW THE FUCK DID I GET HERE
      b 3` ./%__J^qr(a__J;                             
      N_) .r_A_Mm_MmM!p/      /                        
      /,.]_`MMMMMMMMR_`      /                         
       b/.(_MMMMMMMM]Z  ____/                          
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        j/0hMMMMMMMM;p_                                
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       (:_/ay.        ```                              
           ``                                          

#1466: BLOGS SUCK

Sun, 2003 Jun 29

blog

                   __________________________                     
           __..--/".'                        '.                   
   __..--""      | |                          |   WITH THIS BLOG  
  /              | |                          |   I'LL SHOW ALL   
 /               | |    ___________________   |   THOSE JERKS FROM
;                | |   :__________________/:  |   HIGH SCHOOL HOW 
|                | |   |                 '.|  |   SMART AND FUNNY 
|                | |   |                  ||  |   I REALLY AM     
|                | |   |                  ||  |                   
|                | |   |                  ||  |                   
|                | |   |                  ||  |                   
|                | |   |                  ||  |                   
|                | |   |                  ||  |                   
|                | |   |                  ||  |                   
|                | |   |______......-----"\|  |                   
|                | |   |_______......-----"   |                   
|                | |                          |                   
|                | |                          |                   
|                | |                  ____----|                   
|                | |_____.....----|#######|---|                   
|                | |______.....----""""       |                   
|                | |                          |                   
|. ..            | |   ,                      |                   
|... ....        | |  (c ----- """           .'                   
|..... ......  |\|_|    ____......------"""|"                     
|. .... .......| |""""""                   |                      
'... ..... ....| |                         |                      
  "-._ .....  .| |                         |                      
      "-._.....| |             ___...---"""'                      
          "-._.| | ___...---"""                                   
              """""             grp                               

#1832: THE TRIUMVIRATE

Tue, 2004 Jun 29

  ,--.             URINE  
  \  _\_            BLOOD 
  _\/_|_\____.'\     TEARS
-(___.--._____(           
     \   \                
      \   \           FIN 
       `--'               
jg                        

#2197: VACUUM CLEANER BAGS AND AA BATTERIES

Wed, 2005 Jun 29

                   _________               WHAT IF THE ZOMBIES        
             _____/     o o \____---        GET IN AND THE HOUSE IS   
       _____/       o o    o  o o\__--       A HUGE MESS              
   ___/            o  o  o    o   o  \__--                            
 _/              / o o  o   o   o   o  o\_--   WILL THEY WAIT UNTIL   
/    /         |/|/ /o o  o   o   o   o  o\_--  I RUN OUT TO WAL*MART 
|    |-------__/ / /|/o  o  o   o   o   o  o\--  FOR SOME VACUUM      
|    |          / / /|/ o  o  o   o   o  o  o\--  CLEANER BAGS BECAUSE
\_    \         |  / /|/|/ o o  o   o  o  o o\---  SOME OF MY GUESTS  
  \    |_        \  / / /|/ o  o  o   o o  o o\--   CRUSHED CHIPS INTO
  /      \       |   | / / |/ o  o  o  o o --\ \   THE CARPET AND A   
  |   |   |      |_nn|  /  / |/o  | |/   /    \ |   DUSTBUSTER JUST   
  \__/ \__/               /  /\  / \/    |'O` '\     WON'T DO         
                               \   | \    \_ * *\                     
                               |   |  \_____\===/|  OH ALSO I NEED    
                               |_nn|         |_nn|  AA BATTERIES      

#2562: A SERIOUS QUESTION

Thu, 2006 Jun 29

star trek

                __                ___               ___                
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    |  || /         `-'      \\   \'/   //      `-'         \ ||  |    
     |  |/                    \| :(-): |/                    \|  |     
     |  /|                     | : o : |                     |\  |     
      || |                     | |___| |                     | ||      
      \| |                      ||   ||                      | |/      
       \  \                     ||   ||                     /  /       
        \  \                    ||___||                    /  /        
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          \ \\                   |___|                   // /          
           \ \\                  |   |                  // /           
            `. `.                |===|                ,' ,'            
              `._`.              |___|              ,'_,' JR           
                                                                       
       WHY DO THEY LET ARABS ON DS9 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?          
                                                                       
          OR HAVE THEY ALL BEEN FIXED BY THE 24TH CENTURY              

#2927: CONSOLATION T-SHIRT

Fri, 2007 Jun 29

     __.-.__.-.__                                                       
   .'\ '-.__.-' /'.    I FUCKED A PRETTY GIRL WHO TURNED OUT TO BE UNDER
  /  |    ,_    |  \   18 EVEN THOUGH SHE SHOWED ME A FAKE ID WHICH     
 /   |  _/| \_  |   \  LOOKED LEGITIMATE AND THEN I GOT CONVICTED AND   
 '-._/ \.-""-./ \_.-'  PUT IN PRISON FOR STATUTORY RAPE AND THEN WHILE  
     | ( ^ \^ ) |      IN PRISON I GOT PUNKED OUT FOR BEING A CHILD     
     |  \ == /  |      MOLESTER AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHIRT    
     |  /'--'\  |                                                       
jgs  |          |                                                       
     '._      _.'                                                       
        `""""`                                                          

#3293: FRIZZ

Sun, 2008 Jun 29

word

           _,,,_                                
         .'     `'.                             
        /     ____ \      I'M PRETTY SURE WOMEN 
       |    .'_  _\/       JUST MADE UP THE TERM
       /    ) a  a|         "FRIZZ"             
      /    (    > |                             
     (      ) ._  /                             
     )    _/-.__.'`\                            
    (  .-'`-.   \__ )                           
     `/      `-./  `.                           
      |    \      \  \                          
jgs   |     \   \  \  \                         
      |\     `. /  /   \                        

#3658: MATH IS HARD

Mon, 2009 Jun 29

math

         .---                              
        / # o                              
        \,__>        MATH IS HARD (AS AM I)
     .o-'-'--._                            
    / |\_      '.                          
   |  |  \   -,  \                         
   \  /   \__| ) |                         
    '|_____[)) |,/                         
       |===H=|\ >>                         
       \  __,| \_\                         
        \/   \  \_\                        
        |\    |  \/                        
        | \   \   \\                       
        |  \   |   \\                      
        |__|\ ,-ooD \\                     
        |--\_(\.-'   \o                    
snd     '-.__)                             

#4023: LIVER

Tue, 2010 Jun 29

        .----.                                                    
       ===(_)==                                                   
      // 6  6 \\    DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT TODAY !!!!!!11           
      (    7   )                                                  
       \ '--' /      TIME TO SEE HOW MY LIVER IS                  
        \_ ._/                                                    
       __)  (__                                                   
    /"`/`\`V/`\`\                                                 
   /   \  `Y _/_ \                                                
  / [DR]\_ |/ / /\                                                
  |     ( \/ / / /                                                
   \  \  \      /    WELP TURNS OUT IT'S COVERED IN GLITTER AND   
    \  `-/`  _.`    HAS SILVER AND GOLD STICKERS ALL OVER IT      
jgs  `=. `=./                                                     
        `"`     SO DRINKS ARE ON ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111

#4388: ULTIMATE REVENGE

Wed, 2011 Jun 29

pearl harbor, world war ii

 _______________     MODERN-DAY JAPANESE POP BANDS AND GAME SHOWS
|,----------.  |\    ARE THE UNITED STATES' ULTIMATE REVENGE FOR 
||           |=| |   THE SURPRISE ATTACK ON PEARL HARBOR         
||          || | |                                               
||       . _o| | | __                                            
|`-----------' |/ /~/                                            
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ / /                                             
             Ojo ~~                                              

#4754: HARLAN ELLISON'S GREATEST WORK

Fri, 2012 Jun 29

  _____                                 
  |   D   I HAVE NO ANUS AND I MUST SHIT
  |   |                                 
  |   |                                 
  \___|            _                    
    ||  _______  -( (-                  
    |_'(-------)  '-'                   
       |       /                        
_____,-\__..__|_____Pr59                

#5119: NFL

Sat, 2013 Jun 29

topical

                 __                                                
              .-'||'-.                                             
            .'   ||   '.                                           
           /   __||__   \                                          
           | /`-    -`\ |                                          
           | | 6    6 | |   WELP I MADE IT TO THE NFL !!!!!        
           \/\____7___/\/                                          
   .--------:\:I:II:I:/;--------.     TIME TO FUCKING MURDER PEOPLE
  /          \`:I::I:`/          \                                 
 |            `------'            |                                
 |             \____/             |                                
 |      ,     __   _____   ,      |                                
 |======|    / /  /  _  \  |======|                                
 |======|   / /__ \ <_> /  |======|                                
 |~~~~~|   | <_> \/ <_> \   |~~~~~|                                
 |     |\   \____/\_____/  /|     |                                
  \    \|                  |/    /                                 
  `\    \  _ _.-=""=-._ _  /    /'                                 
    `\   '`_)\\-++++-//(_`'   /'                                   
jgs   ;   (__||      ||__)   ;                                     
       ;   ___\      /___   ;                                      
        '. ---/-=..=-\--- .'                                       
          `""`        `""`                                         

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