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#159: I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE

Tue, 1999 Nov 30

garfield

         _.._   _..---.                                
      .-"    ;-"       \                               
     /      /           |                              
    |      |       _=   |      I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE
    ;   _.-'\__.-')     |      ................. A DICK
     `-'      |   |    ;                               
              |  /;   /      _,                        
            .-.;.-=-./-""-.-` _`                       
           /   |     \     \-` `,                      
          |    |      |     |                          
          |____|______|     |                          
           \0 / \0   /      /                          
        .--.-""-.`--'     .'                           
       (#   )          ,  \                            
       ('--'          /\`  \                           
        \       ,,  .'      \                          
         `-._    _.'\        \                         
jgs          `""`    \        \                        

#525: LAME

Thu, 2000 Nov 30

figlet, original

                                                   -----               
                                                 /      \              
                                                 )      |              
          :================:                      "    )/              
         /||              ||                      )_ /*                
        / ||    System    ||                          *                
       |  ||     Down     ||                   (=====~*~======)        
        \ || Please wait  ||                  0      \ /       0       
          ==================                //   (====*====)   ||      
   ........... /      \.............       //         *         ||     
   :\        ############            \    ||    (=====*======)  ||     
   : ---------------------------------     V          *          V     
   : |  *   |__________|| ::::::::::  |    o   (======*=======) o      
   \ |      |          ||   .......   |    \\         *         ||     
     --------------------------------- 8   ||   (=====*======)  //     
                                        8   V         *         V      
     --------------------------------- 8   =|=;  (==/ * \==)   =|=     
     \   ###########################  \   / ! \     _ * __    / | \    
      \  +++++++++++++++++++++++++++   \  ! !  !  (__/ \__)  !  !  !   
       \ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++   \        0 \ \V/ / 0           
        \________________________________\     ()   \o o/   ()         
         *********************************     ()           ()         
                                                                       
                                           EW                          
                                                                       
GET IT ?!?!?! THE GUY IS WAITING FOR THE MACHINE AND HE'S A SKELETON   
BECAUSE HE DIED AND DECAYED HE WAS WAITING SO LONG !!!! STILL DON'T    
GET IT ??? HERE LET ME DRAW A DIAGRAM :::                              
                                                                       
                                         _        _    __  __ _____    
     _____________________________|\    | |      / \  |  \/  | ____|   
    |                               \   | |     / _ \ | |\/| |  _|     
    |_____________________________  /   | |___ / ___ \| |  | | |___    
                                  |/    |_____/_/   \_\_|  |_|_____|   
                                                                    tQn
                                                                       

#890: MR. SPOCK

Fri, 2001 Nov 30

   .8888888.   
  8r  '8'  8e  
  P '-. .-' 9  
  |  O   O  |  
\-T\       /7-/
 \|  .\_/.  |/ 
  | |__~__| |  
  | |\___/| |  
   \__   __/   
      \_/      
_____/   \_VJ__
               
 WHAT THE FUCK 
 IS THAT ????? 

#1255: ARBITRARILY

Sat, 2002 Nov 30

MY DICK HAS ARBITRARILY BEEN CHOSEN   
   FOR YOU TO STICK IN YOUR FACE      
                                      
                ,|                    
          f\  . ,-  / |               
          | \_|f,,-/  |-.             
         ,'-. ,-.       `.            
        (,-.  ,-.        Y            
        f   Yf   Y       |            
        l 0 jl 0 j       l            
      ,,-`-'  `-'         Y           
  ,-'"""`-.       ,--.    I           
 (         )  _,-'    \   l           
  `-,.__,,'''". .  /   Y   Y          
   (        .    ,'\   |   |          
    `.__,-._,,-l"\  Y  |   |          
   _ _ / /      \   j  j  -l          
  f f f f\       `-'  f     \         
  l    'j Y           l      \        
   Y_ _j /j            Y  .   \       
   (___)/f             |   \   Y      
    |  | |             |    Y  |      
    l  ` |             |    j  j      
     `--'|             |   /__/       
         |             |  (_  )       
         l             j  /   |-.     
          \    .      /  ( . . ` )    
          l`._       /    \_\_\_/     
           \  "`----'    /            
            `._         f             
             | `""-.    |             
             |   |  Y   |             
           __j   l__j   `-.           
        ,''      ,'        Y          
       f        f          | PK       
.......`--------`----------'..........

#1620: LONELY

Sun, 2003 Nov 30

         I'M LONELY IN HERE
                           
 .__   .-".   /            
(o\"\  |  |  /             
   \_\ |  |                
  _.---:_ |                
 ("-..-" /                 
  "-.-" /                  
    /   |                  
    "--"  AsH              

#1986: A CURE FOR ALCOHOLISM

Tue, 2004 Nov 30

                                _.,_               
                             ,-'.' .`-,            
                            ;; '. ' `. ;` - _      
                         _,-; ' ; `.  ,% .-,  -    
                  ,_.,-'`   ';; ; : ;%'  | |   \   
      ___  _._,-`'\            `'-`'  _.,' `.   )  
__,--`-,,`'  ,._,.-`-., _.,-.--.-,`''`  |  _|   |__
 `---'////\ /  .-,     `-`-^--`'^`-...,,| | |.,/   
      //\)(/   `-\.-.                   | `-'      
                 ( .-;                  |   |    ,.
                  `-~ ~~-.              `._.'  ,/ /
                    `~ ~~~ ~~     mic         /,.`)
                                             //  / 
    I HAVE A GUARANTEED CURE FOR            /_ `/  
     ALCOHOLISM !!!!!!!!!!!!!              (  `/   
                                            `-'    
         HEROIN                                    

#2351: WIPEOUT PURE

Wed, 2005 Nov 30

word

 _n_________________                                                    
|_|_______________|_|                                                   
|  ,-------------.  |                                                   
| |  .---------.  | |   PSP: $250                                       
| |  |         |  | |                                                   
| |  |         |  | |   WIPEOUT PURE FOR PSP: $50                       
| |  |         |  | |                                                   
| |  |         |  | |   DOWNLOADING MAP PACKS FOR WIPEOUT PURE OVER ONE 
| |  `---------'  | |   OF MY NEIGHBOR'S WIRELESS NETWORKS WITHOUT      
| `---------------' |   ENCRYPTION DIRECTLY TO THE PSP WITHOUT BOTHERING
|   _ GAME BOY      |   TO SET UP AN ACCESS POINT: HAW HAW              
| _| |_         ,-. |                                                   
||_ O _|   ,-. "._,"|                                                   
|  |_|    "._,"   A |                                                   
|    _  _    B      |                                                   
|   // //           |   WARDRIVING ???? FUCK THAT I CALL IT WARWALKING, 
|  // //    \\\\\\  |   WARSITTING, WARDRINKINGABEER                    
|  `  `      \\\\\\ ,                                                   
|________...______,"  hjw                                               

#2716: INCONSOLABLE

Thu, 2006 Nov 30

inconsolable, pornstar, word

         ,        ,                                               
         \y ,--.y/                                                
         /,---. )\      WELP TERA PATRICK GOT A STUPID HAIR DYE   
        / (((\\)\ \      AND UGLY TATTOOS AND A FUCKED UP BOOB JOB
        \ \\-_/ / /                                               
         \ i   i /                                                
          (_)=(_)                                                 
           ) . (                                                  
          /\---/\                                                 
         /  )-(  \                                                
        /  /   \  \                                               
       / ,"     ". \     SHORT STORY: MY BONER IS INCONSOLABLE    
      / /         \ \                                             
hjw  /-)           (-\                                            
    / ^!           !^ \                                           

#3081: MY RELIGION

Fri, 2007 Nov 30

                         ___                        
        __              /.-.\                       
       /  )_____________\\  Y      MY RELIGION CAN'T
      /_ /=== == === === =\ _\_     AFFORD BOOKS    
     ( /)=== == === === == Y   \                    
      `-------------------(  o  )                   
hjw                        \___/                    

#3447: YES/NO ON 8

Sun, 2008 Nov 30

election 2008

(        )                                           
O        O                                           
()      ()                                           
 Oo.nn.oO                                            
  _mmmm_                                             
\/_mmmm_\/                                           
\/_mmmm_\/    I VOTED "WHO GIVES A FUCKING SHIT" ON 8
\/_mmmm_\/                                           
\/ mmmm \/                                           
    nn                                               
    ()                                               
    ()                                               
     ()    /                                         
 apc  ()__()                                         
       '--'                                          

#3812: BLACK PRESIDENT

Mon, 2009 Nov 30

obama

                 _ _.-'`-._ _                                           
                ;.'________'.;                                          
     _________n.[____________].n_________                               
    |""_""_""_""||==||==||==||""_""_""_""]                              
    |"""""""""""||..||..||..||"""""""""""|                              
    |LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI|                              
    |.. .. .. ..||..||..||..||.. .. .. ..|                              
    |LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI|                              
 ,,;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;,;;;,;;;,;;,,                           
;;jgs;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;                          
                                                                        
   WHOA                                                                 
                                                                        
   WHOA                                                                 
                                                                        
   ***WHOA***                                                           
                                                                        
   WE ELECTED A BLACK PRESIDENT ?!?!?!?                                 
                                                                        
   HOW DID I MISS THIS WASN'T THERE NEWS ABOUT IT SOMEWHERE OR SOMETHING

#4177: SINCERE CAREER WISHES

Tue, 2010 Nov 30

  _____                                               
  |   D  I HOPE JOE THE PLUMBER'S CAREER IS GOING WELL
  |   |                                               
  |   |                                               
  \___|            _                                  
    ||  _______  -( (-                                
    |_'(-------)  '-'                                 
       |       /                                      
_____,-\__..__|_____Pr59                              
                                                      

#4542: STOMACH ACHE

Wed, 2011 Nov 30

                     ,- _,-'""`-._                                        
               \    / ,'dHHb   |/ `-.                                     
     _,-'|"`-.  `- / /  HHHH---<_____`.                                   
  ,-'  ""\    `. -'_ \  `HHP   /\    ,'                                   
,'   \|   dHHb  \   '.`./   \ __ \,-'                                     
`.""""\___HHHH  /     \ `-.__|,-'     UGH I FEEL SICK                     
  `-. /   /HHP,' /   \                                                    
     `-._/_,-'   \/\/\|               MAYBE I SHOULDN'T HAVE CHUGGED DOWN 
                                      THOSE FIVE JARS OF MARMALADE AT 2 AM
              ,-'"""-"""`-.           JUST BEFORE BED AND FINISHED IT OFF 
              \""\""""""\"/           WITH A WHOLE BOTTLE OF TOBASCO SAUCE
               `--\  \\  \                                                
                   \  \\  \  Krogg                                        
                    `-.__.'                                               

#4908: FLYING CARS

Fri, 2012 Nov 30

                  _..-------++._                    
              _.-'/ |      _||  \"--._              
        __.--'`._/_\j_____/_||___\    `----.        
   _.--'_____    |          \     _____    /        
 _j    /,---.\   |        =o |   /,---.\   |_       
[__]==// .-. \\==`===========/==// .-. \\=[__]      
  `-._|\ `-' /|___\_________/___|\ `-' /|_.'     hjw
        `---'                     `---'             
                                                    
   NEXT PERSON TO MAKE REFERENCE TO THE             
    "WHERE'S MY FLYING CAR" GAG                     
     GETS A PUNCH TO THE FUCKING DICK               

#5273: PINK RIBBON

Sat, 2013 Nov 30

  _                                                                 
, L\     I'D PREFER YOU NOT CHECK FOR LUMPS SO YOUR BOOBS GET BIGGER
\/OO\                                                               
  |/ \                                                              
 /_\  `                                                             
_\  |_ AP                                                           

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