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#130: IDENTIFY ME

Mon, 1999 Nov 1

               .                                     
         .--.-":                                     
      ,-' ' .  '.  I'M SORT OF A SCAVENGER BIRD      
     '.  (o).(o):.   IF YOU CAN IDENTIFY ME YOU GET  
       ..   V  ,-'.     A STIFF DICK UP THE ASS      
       : ".' '.  .:                                  
      .''.     '  :       OR MAYBE A QUARTER I FORGET
      :    " "    :                                  
      :   -   -   :                                  
      :     :     :                                  
.     :           :                                  
:'.   :     :     :                                  
: '.  '           '.                                 
'  :   '     :     '                                 
 '  '.  .          '  .                              
  '  '.  .   :    '  ' '                             
   '.  '--//-.   . .' "                              
     '.   ''  -//-' .'                               
       .      ''   '                                 
     .' '-.        \                                 
    :      "---.    . mga                            
   '            .    .                               
   '            :    '.                              
    " " " " " " '-                                   

#496: ME AND MINE

Wed, 2000 Nov 1

                     :+""  ~<<::""+:                     
                +Xi<<<<!<  `<<!?!<<<HMti%L               
            :?HMMMM:<<<!<~ <<<!X<<<!MM88MMh?x            
          !HMRMMRMMM:<<<!< <<<!!<<<MR88MRMMRMH?.         
        ?NMMMMMMMMMMM<<<?<  <<!!<<XM88RMMMMMMMMM?        
      !88888 BE MMRMMk<<!!  <<H!<<M88MRMMRMMMRMMRM!      
     <M8888888MMMMMMMM:<<!  <<H<<488RMMMMMMMMMMMMMM>:    
   xHMRMMR888888RMMMMMM<<!< <!!<<988RMM GAY MMMMM?!<<%   
  :XMMMMMMMM88888MMMMMMH<<~ ~~~<X8RMMMMMMMMMMM!!<~    k  
  <<<!MMRMMRMMR8888MMP.n~       #R.#MMRMMRM?<~~   .nMMh. 
 !MMH:<<<!*MMMMMMM8Pu! n"       "+ "h!MM!!~   :@MMMMMMM/ 
.HMRMMRMMMH:<<"*RM M @             * "   .nMMMMMMMRMMRMMk
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMx < "      .u.        4'MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM9
!RMMRMMMRMMRMMMMMX M     @P   #8     4 MMRMMMRMMRMMMMMMR<
!MMMMM WITH MMMMMM !    '8     8!    ' MtMMMMMMM ME MMMM!
kMMRMMRMMRMMMRMMR4 H     #8.  @8     H MMMMRMMMMMMRMMRMM!
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM>M         "`      .~i <!?MMMMMMMMMMMMM9
'9MMRMMMRMMRMMP!   : %             H @ 8NRMHx<<<!!MMMMMR!
 >MMMMMMMMM"   <<HMk!i *u       .* x*xR88888MMMMHi<<<<~< 
  !RMM#~   :<:MMRMMMMH.*n:      :*.HRMMMRM8888888MRMMM!  
  !     <<:tMMMMMMMMMM8RM<::: :<<XMMMMMMMMMR88888888MM!  
   ~ <<<XHMRMMMMMMRMM8RM<<<<< `!<<MRMMRMMRMMMRR888888#   
     :HMMMMMMM AND 988MM<<X!<~'~<<<MMMMMM MINE MR88#!    
      ~MMRMMMRMMRMM88MM<<<?<<  <<<<!RMMMRMMRMMMMMM!      
        xMMMMMMMM988MM%<<<?<<: <!<<<?MMMMMMMMMMMX        
          !?MMMM@88MMR<<<<!<<<  <:<<<MRMMRMMMP!          
            "X*988RMM!<<<?!<<~  <!<<<<MMMMM?"            
                !X*MM<<<<H!<<`  <?<<<<<)!                
                     "+:uX!<<< .::+""     BA             

#861: HOLY

Thu, 2001 Nov 1

                         ___.....__                  .+''*-.           
                     .-*"          `"*-.         .-*' ,'`.  `-.        
        _.-=-._    .*                   `*-. .-*'    /    \    `.      
     .-*        `.'                ,sss.   .'       /      \     \     
  .-'  _.-=+=. .'                  T$$$P   `.      /        \     `.   
.'   .*      .'    ,ss.                      `.   /          \      `-.
   .'      .'      `TP'            _.s$$s.     \.'            *       |
 .'       /.sd$bs._             .sP*"    `T.    `            ' .      .
/        .*'     `*b           *"  _...          `          '        , 
          .    =*-.`;              _.._`          ;        /    .      
          `   .*""*+             +*"'`"*.         |       /     ;   .  
           .         ,                   `        |     .'      |      
       _.+=`     ."Ts               ."Ts       $  |   .'        |  .   
     .*     ;    s  $ ,             s  $          :_.'          | /    
   .'     .'    _TbdP :             TbdP       db   :           |/     
  /     .'     ' `":-*'           `.-*'`*      TP   '                  
 /     :        .-' _.sdP"Tb      '                /                   
.      :       |    T$$$bsd$b      `*+=.          /                    
        \      :    `T$$$$$$P        '          .'                     
         `.     \     `T$$P'        d$        .'                       
           `-.   \                 d$$      .'                         
              `---`.     .       .d$$$    .'                           
                    `.+sd$bs._.sd$$$$P   /                             
              [bug]  : $$$$$$$$$$$$$P   /  GUESS WHO'S RAPING YOU      
                     | $$$$$P*"*^T$P   /                               
                     , $$$P'       ;  /                                
                    ' :$$P        /  /                                 
                     \`$P       .'  /                                  
                      \ `-.__.-'  .'                                   
                       `.      .-'                                     
                         `*==*'                                        

#1226: BATTLECRUISER 4000 AD

Fri, 2002 Nov 1

derek smart

                             __                                        
                            /  \      __    MY NAME'S DEREK SMART AND  
.---.                  _   /   /   _.~  \   I'M A VERY IMPORTANT       
\    `.               / \ /   /.-~    __/   FIGURE IN THE COMPUTER GAME
 `\    \              |  |   |/    .-~ __   INDUSTRY !!!!!             
   \    \             |  |   |   .'--~~  \                             
    \    \            |  |   `  ' _______/  YOU WOULD BE FOOLISH TO    
     \    \           |  `        /         START AN ARGUMENT WITH ME  
 .--. \    \          |    `     /          BECAUSE I AM AMAZINGLY     
 \   `.\    \          \        /           WITTY AND CLEVER !!!!      
  `\   \     \          `\     (                                       
    \   \     \           > ,-.-.           HURRRRRRR POSTING TO USENET
     \   `.    \         /  |  \ \          AND MAKING AN EVEN BIGGER  
      \    .    \       /___| O |O\     ,   ASS OUT OF MYSELF          
   .-. \    ;    |    /`    `^-.\.-'`--'/                              
   \  `;         |   |                 /                               
    `\  \        |   `.     `--..____,'                                
      \  `.      |     `._     _.-'^                                   
       \   .     /         `|`|`                                       
     .-.\       /           | |                                        
     \  `\     /            | |                                        
      `\  `   |             | |                                        
        \     |             | |                                        
       .-.    |             | |                                        
       \  `.   \            | |                                        
        `\      \           | |                                        
          \      \          | |                                        
           \_____ :-'~~~~~'-' ;                                        
           /____;``-.         :                                        
          <____(     `.       ;                                        
            \___\     ;     .'                                         
               /``--'~___.-'                                           
              /\___/^/__/                                              
             /   /' /`/'                                               
             \  \   `\ \                                               
              `\ \    \ \                                              
                \ \    \ \                                             
                 \ \    \ \                                            
                  \ \    \ \     ______                                
                   \ \ ___\ \'~``______)>                              
              jgs   \ \___ _______ __)>                                
                _____\ \'~``______)>                                   
              <(_______.._______)>                                     

#1591: MOTD

Sat, 2003 Nov 1

               ` ^ ,   IF YOU CAN READ THIS FROM IRC
               <2 4>    THEN YOU'RE A FUCKING FAGGOT
               ,/v\`                                
                7*~               _                 
               /(16)            (\O/)               
               7*& ~            ( ^ )               
              /(23)'\            /7\                
              7`*o *~            /*\                
             /!*"(1)*\           7+~                
             7(19) & ~          /(9)\               
             /% :(5)*\          7 &+~               
             7 ^ *   ~         /+(14)\              
            /#(22)*& @\        7e !+"~              
            7 *   (13)~       /+ j (4)\             
           /*% *(2)'! *\  _&_ 7(17)m"+~             
           7*(15)*+* * ~ | | |#_*_,'98+\ _(x)_      
          /" *   * #(6)*\| 10|| %_&_>(8)[__|18]     
          7_&_ * (20) * _&_  ()%| | | _(x)_  &      
 _&_  #  &| | |  _(x)_ |11 |[//]|_|_|[__|__][_](+)  
|ejm|[3]<12>|(+)[21|__]|_|_|                        

#1957: BEYOND THE MECHANICAL UNIVERSE

Mon, 2004 Nov 1

 ('.'''.                                         
  ()/ ..)   EPISODE 37: ELECTROMAGNETIC INDUCTION
  o'.__.>                                        
  _ || _  |\                                     
 (_|\/|_)\ /                                     
 //|  |\\//                                      
(( |()\ \/                                       
 \\|   \                                         
_/_| () \                                        
   |     \                                       
   \_._._.'                                      
     \\//                                        
  mrf ))\                                        
     // \\                                       
    (x\_/x)                                      
    (_(___)                                      

#2322: PLUTO

Tue, 2005 Nov 1

pluto, topical

                    ::: =,    ;    PLUTO HAS THREE MOONS !?!?!??!?!?!    
                ;;=;;===      M                                          
   ,=YVRMBBMMR=,   :i=              MAJOR BLOW STRUCK TO GROUP OF AVID   
 :iVRRMMMMMMBMMM :=;  ==;======         AMATEURS WHO WISH TO DEMOTE      
=tYMMMMMMBBMMM;=Y ,::;==iMMMMMMMMMM       PLUTO FROM PLANETARY STATUS    
tYVBBMMVMMMM =; .,,,::;;=YVBBMMMMMMMMM                                   
tYVVYRMMM;=ti ...,,,;::==iMVMMMMMMMMMMMM                                 
=tYRBM;;tVB, ....,  ,::;====YVBMMMMMMMMMM                                
,=t =tYVRB, .....,,,,=:;:;;i=VYMMRMMMMMMMM                               
,===iYVVRY .....,,,;,,,,,:;;==t=RBMMMMMMMMM                              
...       .......,,,,,,,,,:;;==Y=tYMMMMMMMM                              
.         ....,,,,,,,,,,,,,:;;;==YYMRMMMMMM;                             
           .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;=YtVBMMMMM                              
           .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;i=RiRMMMMM   MEANWHILE .......          
             .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:::;;=iYBBMM                                
              .,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,::;;;;tVB   THE REST OF THE ASTRONOMICAL  
M               .,,,,,,,,,,,,:,,,::;;=    COMMUNITY STILL COULDN'T GIVE A
M                 .,,,,,,,,,,,,,:,::    SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!                 
                      `,,,,,,,                                           
                                     THE MAP IS NOT THE TERRITORY        

#2687: TRICK OR TREAT

Wed, 2006 Nov 1

topical

      ___      .-""-.      ___                           
      \  "-.  /      \  .-"  /                           
       > -=.\/        \/.=- <                            
       > -='/\        /\'=- <                            
      /__.-'  \      /  '-.__\                           
 jgs           '-..-'                                    
        ____                                             
      .' /  '.                                           
     /  (  .-'\      I CAN'T BEAT OFF WITH ALL THESE KIDS
    |'.__\/__  |      IN COSTUMES KNOCKING ON MY DOOR    
    |    /\  '.|                                         
     \.-'  )  /                                          
jgs   '.__/_.'                                           
            ____                                         
          .' /:::.                                       
         /  (:::-'\                                      
        |:\__\/__  |                                     
        |::::/\:::\|                                     
         \::'  )::/                                      
 jgs      '.__/::'      ................... OR CAN I     

#3052: BIONIC WOMAN

Thu, 2007 Nov 1

bionic woman

.--------------------                                               
|                                                                   
|     ,-""-.        /)   I DON'T SEE HOW THE NEW BIONIC WOMAN SERIES
|    /  c/-}       //    COULD BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN A COMPLETE,   
|   ( ,--)T-.     //     UNQUALIFIED, EXCELLENT TELEVISUAL FEAST    
|    `/ ,_) )\__,-/                                                 
|    / /.   \'_,-"<                                                 
|   / /  ) _`).__                                                   
| _/,'  (    ""-."-.                                                
|'-/   _/`-----. ),'                                                
|o!O '"-'"""----"                                                   

#3418: ECONOMICS

Sat, 2008 Nov 1

nobel prize

  __                                                       
 (`/\                                                      
 `=\/\ __...--~~~~~-._   _.-~~~~~--...__                   
  `=\/\               \ /               \\                 
   `=\/                V                 \\                
   //_\___--~~~~~~-._  |  _.-~~~~~~--...__\\               
  //  ) (..----~~~~._\ | /_.~~~~----.....__\\              
 ===( INK )==========\\|//====================             
__ejm\___/________dwb`---`____________________             
                                                           
   IN A COMPETITIVE MARKET, THE PROFIT-MAXIMIZING MARGINAL 
   PRODUCT OF LABOR IS EQUAL TO THE WAGES FOR LABOR        
   EXPRESSED IN TERMS OF THE PRICE !!!!!!!112231323FSFDKFSD
                                                           
   WHEEZE COUGH CAN I HAVE MY NOBEL PRIZE NOW OR           
   WHATEVER IT IS THEY HAND OUT LIKE CANDY                 

#3783: GEORGE WASHINGTON'S TRUE ADMISSION

Sun, 2009 Nov 1

  __.--~~.,-.__                                                    
  `~-._.-(`-.__`-.     I CANNOT TELL A LIE                         
          \    `~~`                                                
     .--./ \                                                       
    /#   \  \.--.                                                  
    \    /  /#   \                                                 
jgs  '--'   \    /     I TOTALLY FUCKED THAT CHERRY TREE INSIDE OUT
             '--'                                                  

#4148: LAWN CHAIR

Mon, 2010 Nov 1

                     (                                                   
                   ) )                                                   
                  ( (  ))                                                
                   ) )(                                                  
                    ))       ))),,    RELAXING ON MY LAWN CHAIR          
                    (       /  ///                                       
                           _ _  /       SMOKING MY CRACK PIPE            
                   _U___  <     )  ()                                    
                  / /      \_- |. //                                     
                  \_|       |,-"|//                                      
                   __     ,-"   //                                       
                  /  \ ,-"     //     I MEAN TOBACCO PIPE                
     _  .  --. ,--\," "---    //                                         
 /\_/ \| ""  -"    "-.       //    YEAH TOBACCO PIPE                     
 \  \  |                    //|                                          
,_\________________________//||      WELP ANYWAY OFF TO GO STEAL HUB CAPS
'--------------------------, ||                                          
   //                      \\||                                          
  //                  utis  \\|                                          

#4513: SAMURAI

Tue, 2011 Nov 1

                                 /)                          
                                //                           
              __*_             //                            
           /-(____)           //                             
          ////- -|\          //                              
       ,____o% -,_          //                               
      /  \\   |||  ;       //                                
     /____\....::./\      //                                 
    _/__/#\_ _,,_/--\    //     THIS IS A SAMURAI            
    /___/######## \/""-(\</                                  
   _/__/ '#######  ""^(/</    NOT A NINJA                    
 __/ /   ,)))=:=(,    //.                                    
|,--\   /Q...... /.  (/     SO YOU FUCKING IDIOT BACON ZOMBIE
/       .Q....../..\         NERDS DON'T EVEN GET STARTED    
       /.Q ..../...\                                         
      /......./.....\                                        
      /...../  \.....\                                       
      /_.._./   \..._\                                       
       (` )      (` )                                        
       | /        \ |                                        
       '(          )'                                        
      /+|          |+\                                       
      |,/          \,/  b'ger                                

#4879: YOUTUBE STAR

Thu, 2012 Nov 1

youtube

                    o                                                  
           o       /                                                   
            \     /                                                    
             \   /                                                     
              \ /                                                      
+--------------v-------------+                                         
|  __________________      @ |   I WISH I WERE A YOUTUBE STAR SO THAT I
| /                  \       |   COULD OBSESS ABOUT VIEWER NUMBERS AND 
| |             ,--, |  (\)  |   STATS I DON'T UNDERSTAND AND SUCK OFF 
| |       _ ___/ /\| |       |   OTHER, MORE POPULAR, YOUTUBE STARS    
| |   ,;`( )__, )  ~ |  (-)  |   AND NEVER AMOUNT TO ANYTHING IN LIFE  
| |  // o//   '--;   |       |                                         
| \  ' o \     |     / :|||: |                                         
|  -ooo--------------  :|||: |                                         
+----------------------------+                                         
   []                    []                                            

#5244: THE MORE THINGS CHANGE

Fri, 2013 Nov 1

                                                _                           
              __....---------------.       _.-'' |   THE MORE THINGS CHANGE 
           ,:'_ \__      '._`-.,--- `.    / _.-' |   THE MORE THEY STAY     
 _       ,'',-.`.  |_____   `-:_`-.,- \  / / _.- |   ***INSANE*** !!!!1111  
| `.   ,' : `-' ;_,'---. `--..__`-:._`-`' /,'__. :                          
|:  `.' o-'`---'  |    |     .--`---<----<:-..__ /                          
|::--._.      __.-'  _ |.--.-'---.   )-,. \\`. . \   HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH        
|:  ,.  `'`.,'  , , / |:| _|    ,' ,`-/  \ \\ `. :                          
|_,'  `-.    _.',' (_ |:| _| _,','`- /    \ \`.  |   HAHAHAHAHAHA GET IT ?!?
         `-.__  [|_| ||:|__,','`--- /      \ \ ` |                          
              `-..._______.:..-----' SSt    \_`. |                          
                                              `-.|   OKAY NEITHER DO I      

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FACTOIDS
  • number of strips: 5372
  • first strip created on: Fri, 1999 Jun 25 (14.7 years ago)
  • number of upcoming strips: 0 (0.0 weeks' worth; empty on Tue, 2020 Jul 14)
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