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"SOMETIMES I'M AT HOME ON A FRIDAY NIGHT BECAUSE MY 'FRIENDS' DON'T 'LIKE ME' AND 'DON'T WANT ME ANYWHERE AROUND THEM'"
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#5372: COSMOS REBOOT (Sun, 2014 Mar 9)
...
#1381: TORTURE DEVICE (Sat, 2003 Apr 5)
#1380: IMAC (Fri, 2003 Apr 4)
#1379: AMERICAN HISTORY X (Thu, 2003 Apr 3)
#1378: THE FISH SAYS (Wed, 2003 Apr 2)
#1377: APRIL FOOL'S (Tue, 2003 Apr 1)
#1376: COFFEE, HOT (Mon, 2003 Mar 31)
#1375: LINCOS (Sun, 2003 Mar 30)
#1374: COLD-FILTERED (Sat, 2003 Mar 29)
#1373: WORD UP G (Fri, 2003 Mar 28)
#1372: SOURCE ME (Thu, 2003 Mar 27)
#1371: TORSO (Wed, 2003 Mar 26)
#1370: PRESIDENT BARTLETT (Tue, 2003 Mar 25)
#1369: OSCAR NIGHT (Mon, 2003 Mar 24)
#1368: A SQUEAKING SOUND (Sun, 2003 Mar 23)
#1367: PENIS MAN (Sat, 2003 Mar 22)
#1366: IRAQ WAR UPDATE (Fri, 2003 Mar 21)
#1365: HUNTING LICENSE VIOLATION (Thu, 2003 Mar 20)
#1364: SADLY IMMORTALIZED (Wed, 2003 Mar 19)
#1363: CRACK COCAINE (Tue, 2003 Mar 18)
#1362: ASKING FOR IT (Mon, 2003 Mar 17)
#1361: VOTE_AWP (Sun, 2003 Mar 16)
#1360: MOUSE AND MOUSE PAD (Sat, 2003 Mar 15)
#1359: ROBOT (Fri, 2003 Mar 14)
#1358: FIREARMS SAFETY CERTIFICATE (Thu, 2003 Mar 13)
#1357: CONNECTIONS (Wed, 2003 Mar 12)
#1356: THE ICE TRAY WAS RIGHT BUT FORTY YEARS LATE (Tue, 2003 Mar 11)
#1355: CHRONIC FATIGUE SYNDROME (Mon, 2003 Mar 10)
#1354: LOCKED BOX (Sun, 2003 Mar 9)
#1353: BAT GUANO (Sat, 2003 Mar 8)
#1352: FIRST DRAWING EVER (Fri, 2003 Mar 7)
#1351: A FUTURE SUPERMODEL SPEAKS (Thu, 2003 Mar 6)
#1350: YET ANOTHER PATRIOTIC EPISODE (Wed, 2003 Mar 5)
#1349: NIGHT LANDING (Tue, 2003 Mar 4)
#1348: LAWNMOWER (Mon, 2003 Mar 3)
#1347: NOT NAPALM BUT CLOSE (Sun, 2003 Mar 2)
#1346: COME TO JAMAICA (Sat, 2003 Mar 1)
#1345: BUKKAKE VICTIM NUMBER ONE (Fri, 2003 Feb 28)
#1344: NAHEO (Thu, 2003 Feb 27)
#1343: THE ALIEN SPEAKS (Wed, 2003 Feb 26)
#1342: ROCK ON (Tue, 2003 Feb 25)
#1341: JUSTICE SCALIA (Mon, 2003 Feb 24)
#1340: I HATE YOU, NEVER FORGET THAT (Sun, 2003 Feb 23)
#1339: FRIGHTENING ACRONYM (Sat, 2003 Feb 22)
#1338: AS A HOOKER (Fri, 2003 Feb 21)
#1337: WYMEN (Thu, 2003 Feb 20)
#1336: ILLUMINATI (Wed, 2003 Feb 19)
...
#1: SURF'S UP (Fri, 1999 Jun 25)
<<< #1357: CONNECTIONS | #1359: ROBOT >>>

#1358: FIREARMS SAFETY CERTIFICATE

Thu, 2003 Mar 13

                           _      WELP !!!!!!                    
                        _-' "'-,                                 
                     _-' | d$$b | MY WIFE DIED UNDER A SUSPICIOUS
                  _-'    | $$$$ | FIREARMS CLEANING ACCIDENT !!!!
               _-'       | Y$$P |                                
            _-'|         |      | AGAIN !!!!!                    
         _-'  _*         |      |                                
      _-' |_-"      __--''\    /  AT LEAST THE JURY FAILED TO    
   _-'         __--'     __*--'   INDICT THIS TIME !!!           
 -'       __-''    __--*__-"`                                    
|    _--''   __--*"__-'`          TIME TO BREAK OUT THAT FIREARMS
|_--"  .--=`"__-||"               SAFETY CERTIFICATE AND GET ME  
|      |  |\\   ||                A NEW WIFE                     
| .dUU |  | \\ //                                                
| UUUU | _|___//                                                 
| UUUU |  |                                                      
| UUUU |  |         [Matzec]                                     
| UUUU |  |                                                      
| UUUU |  |                                                      
| UUUU |  |                                                      
| UUP' |  |                                                      
|   ___^-"`                                                      
 ""'                                                             

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